Are you sufficiently oxidized, sanitized and deodorized?
By Sparks
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
Regina, Saskatchewan
May 10, 2008 12:36am CST
This morning while shaving my arm pits I noticed I was out of toilet bowl cleaner. My shampoo is nearly gone - don't get me started on the conditioner, and the soap dish was emptier than my Lady Speed Stick. My razor is getting dull, the washer needs detergent and my box of Bounce Dryer Sheets has no bounce left. That was the bathroom.
The kitchen actually scared me to death with all it's needy greedy demands for more dishwasher soap cakes, J-Clothes, drain fluid, chrome cleaner, vacuum bags, sponges, squeegies, window spray, furniture polish, polish remover, swiffer duster refills, paper towels, scouring pads, air fresheners,.... ad infinitum!
That's it! I have enough! I can't take it anymore.
No more sanitizing, no more oxidizing and no more deodorizing!
It's not that I despise housework and the expense of smelling like a daisy. It just dawned on me that if I let the hair on my body grow, and the dust bunnies copulate to their hearts content, and the splishes and splashes that cover my counters and appliances with greasy film remain glinting in the sunlight, the soon to be ex may just vacate the premises in record time and never wanna come back! LOL Am I smart or what!
The trick of course, will be to lose my sense of sight and smell until the house is mine, all mine, and I can clean it and me to my heart's content.
Ok, ok, not gonna happen. I get it.
But hey, a girl can dream can't she? LOL
7 people like this
13 responses
@edgyk8inmomma (2157)
• United States
10 May 08
hehe, you're so funny!!
It just may work, but I'd feel bad for you till it does.
5 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
10 May 08
I feel bad for me already just thinking about it this morning in the light of day! LOL
4 people like this
Just in time too cause I had plenty to do tomorrow!!
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
13 May 08
Yep - you can stop right now! EVERY day is a me day from here on in.
I Sparks declare it, so it will be so!LOL
4 people like this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
13 May 08
You go girl!
Give him he11!
That's my girl!
Luv ya dearly.
(((HUGS)))
3 people like this
@Tetchie (2932)
• Australia
12 May 08
Its a sign!!! Clean up your act? Or clean him out before there's nothing to clean him out with. Clean sweep. Or buy the new stuff in readiness for the spring clean of all spring cleans. Down size and streamline the cleaning products.
Quite frankly I'm really good with the cleaning stuff. BUT I hate doing all that hard work to have someone else come in and mess it up. I use to be a clean addict, was my nature. But I've dropped allot of it, though I'm still into the cleaner side of life I no longer do a trip if someone messes up my space. Do a real good clean when he goes though.
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
13 May 08
Several years I thought I had downsized the cleaning products. LOL
You can be sure I'll be doing it again in spades though when the soon to be ex is finally the ex! LOL
4 people like this
@sunshinelady (7609)
• United States
11 May 08
I was laughing as I read this post. I don't know too many women who would be able to ignore that even if it was to get rid of someone. A girl sure can dream but of course that is what it is is a dream. Hmmmm or should I call it wishful thinking. Have a great day sparkofinsanity.
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
12 May 08
Thanks sunshine! Some dreams are worth it, no matter what the cost. LOL
4 people like this
@mummymo (23706)
•
12 May 08
That is a good plan sweety but I am sure that the ex could stand it for longer than you could! I do get what you are saying though and there are so many products that need replacing all the time - I am trying to cut back on them and started with a razor - got a rechargeable lady shave so I don't need to worry about running out of blades and best of all it is pink! I have to say that I was confused hoe shaving your oxters (armpits in Scottish) led you to realise that you needed toilet bowl cleaner though - or was that the voices? xxx
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
13 May 08
LOL mummy - you have more distractions running around than I do though! But when my kids were small even they noticed - at the top of thier voices too! LOL My youngest used to check my tampon box and let me know when I was down to only two left! ROFL Talk about OCD!
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
12 May 08
Not the voices - just a really small bathroom with no storage, so everything's rather obvious to the eye! LOL
4 people like this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
13 May 08
spark the trouble with all of that is while
it may get the ex out quick you will have
to live with the grease and gunk and the smell
too. but maybe worth it at that lol just to
see him gag and suppter and take off like
a prodded cow. sure is a good dream. more
practical than my idea of the bee hives lol
course you could pass him with stuff to dump in
the garbage can and just sort of have you wrist do
a flop and You could cry as the garbage drips down
his chin. oh I am so sorry, my dumb wrist gave out on
me. haha ha
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
13 May 08
Hatley! I do believe you have an evil streak! LOL Good for you - and great idea too! ROFL
3 people like this
@gabs8513 (48686)
• United Kingdom
11 May 08
Lol I was going to say you would punish yourself to there so no not a good Idea lol
I do not run out of things like that as I will always have spare ones
Once I run out and start the spare one I will on my next Shopping list replace it lol
And I guess you do to
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
12 May 08
I usually always keep back ups of everything (I buy everything in twoes.lol) but over the past few months, I haven't been able to get to the city to shop. Hubby controlling purse strings and all. This past weekend though he took me into town on Mother's Day and I stocked up - I even bought a new BOOK right under his nose and he didn't say a word! WooHoo! Making progress for sure, I am! LOL
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
10 May 08
Now that's what I call 'going commando!' LOL
4 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
10 May 08
LOL - You're hired Olive!
2 people like this
@skinnychick (6905)
• United States
10 May 08
I'm a freak when it comes to sanitizing and deodorizing.
But your idea is brilliant. That has to be a sure way to get rid of an unwanted man. I'll have to keep this for future reference. Thanks for the great idea.
3 people like this
@skinnychick (6905)
• United States
12 May 08
LMAO! That's the best present a girl could have!
2 people like this
@cynicalandoutspoken (4725)
• United States
10 May 08
I only buy laundry necessities when they are on sale and I stock up for a whole year. I currently have 4 boxes of 120 count Snuggle Dryer sheets, 6 bottles 60 wash loads each of snuggle fabric softener, and 3 bottles of 300 oz liquid laundry detergent. I should be all set until at least school starts in the fall.
I never run out of Lady speed stick or sure because I buy 2 pack deals of it every time it goes on sale as well.
I can never keep trash bags and dish washer tabs though. Those grow legs and walk out from under my kitchen sink. It may have something to do with my daughter washing 4 plates 2 bowls and one pot and saying that is all that will fit in the dish washer every time it is her turn to wash the dishes but I will have to do more research into that theory before it can be stated as fact.
Let the hair on my body grow? I could do that but then I could never come to visit you. Someone would see me walking in your back pasture and call the local news that they have spotted a baby Sasquatch.
And I would look funny in my wedding dress if I had beards under my arms and enough hair on my legs that it could be braided.
You say a girl can dream can't she. I think I've just succeeded in giving myself nightmares. lol
@cynicalandoutspoken (4725)
• United States
10 May 08
Anything to make you laugh darlin. Even at my own expense 
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
10 May 08
LOL - me too! Thanks a lot Cyn! ROFL
3 people like this
@p1kef1sh (45681)
•
10 May 08
As you know I have just been visiting my ancient aunt. A feature of the dribble house that she lives in is incontinence pads on all the chairs. These are placed there shortly before the aged ones plonk there derrieres down and lifted again, by an orderly wearing latex gloves as they leave. Perhaps you might like to try this at Chez Sparky's for the STB Ex? Well, he's been so unreliable in other areas...... "And the smell my dear......."
3 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
10 May 08
LOL, I actually have some of those pads, from when his Mum used to visit!
And I did say I'd have to lose my sense of smell - clothes pin on the nose you think? ROFL
2 people like this
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
10 May 08
Send it with the bra! LOL I'm still waiting for that. I can hardly wait to tell the postmistress what's in the package! LOL
2 people like this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
13 May 08
HA! You're using one of MY TACTICS I have used to train my stubborn SO!
By letting the dishes pile up, I FINALLY got my husband to start doing dishes after 15 YEARS together of me doing them.
By not vacuuming any more, because I was just sick of doing it and having him waltz in with his dirty boots on MINUTES AFTERWARDS, I have finally gotten him to use the vacuum and care about people wearing boots in the house.
3 people like this
I thought I smelled brownies but it was all the sweet in here
@sparkofinsanity (20471)
• Regina, Saskatchewan
13 May 08
*Sigh* I KNEW it wasn't an original idea! LOL See --- you HAVE influenced me! LOL
3 people like this
@AnnieOakley1 (5596)
• Canada
13 May 08
My dear, I think we have influenced each other so much over the years, that we, neither of us knows for sure where one begins and the other ends.
We are often just alter egos of each other. Or of one, maybe.
2 people like this
