are you afraid of death

When he was sixteen, my son asked me two questions. Seeking and finding the answers became the second biggest life changing event of my life. Sure, I answered his questions, but I wasn't satisfied with the answers.. But yes, I don't look forward to leaving my family until I have [#1] paid any bills I have, or have enough insurance to bury me and pay my bills, and [#2] done the things I think I should accomplish, and [#3] I want to die when my husband is too old to be much interested in a new wife :)) can't help it.. wanna be his only wife in the resurrection. The two questions my son asked? He was being bitter and said, "why did God put the tree of knowing good and evil in the garden? (and) "isn't it great we get to be an ant farm..? - Well, I realized we're not an ant farm, and that's the very reason why life is difficult and the world is as it is.. But how great is that? Next, as soon as man and angel were endowed with thinking ability (and choice) a whole new world (or tree) of possibilities 'came to be' and God only being able to be true, and honest, well, there was that tree in the garden.. and how wonderful, that God isn't creating an ant farm.. he's creating the best, a family.. and has done all things in order to bring about the best possible of outcomes.. the best 'end' result. I'm not afraid, I've come to understand that God is life itself (of course) and also Perfect.. to be life/alive, he can only be Excellent.. and ultimately, life can only be perfect..