How do you deal with this?
By thuynhu
@thuynhu (661)
United States
May 15, 2008 12:38pm CST
Today I found out that a very close friend of mine tried to commit suicide the other day. I was in complete shock when I contacted him and he told me he was in the hospital. I didn't know what to think and then he told me he overdose on some pills. He took 75 pills of something, he didn't tell me what, but still. He told me he doesn't want to be here anymore that he just isn't happy. I stayed on the phone with him for about 2 hours until he needed to sleep since he was at the hospital and they gave him medicine to relax. I tried to convince him that he's suppose to be here. I just don't know what else I can possible say to him to make him believe he should be here. He's only 19 years old.
What do you think I should say? What would you say if it were your friend? Have you ever been in this situation before?
Help me please, I don't want to lose my friend.
2 people like this
4 responses
@Remembering1996 (2219)
• United States
17 May 08
Well first off someone needs to find the root of the problem of why he's not happy and wants to die. He says he's not happy but there is a reason why he isn't happy. Does he have any hidden bad feelings that you are aware of? has he ever talked about anything that could possibly drive him to this point whether family issues, something that has happend in his life, feels like no body cares, anything at all?. I will say he is a lucky kid for takeing that many pills could of done him in but something stopped that from happening and to tell you the honest trueth I don't think god was ready to take him home and wants him to stay and get the help he needs for he still has a purpose on this earth what ever it may be. All you can really do is just be a true friend and talk w/ him get him to open up and say what ever it is that is wanting him to be the way he is. Get him to go to counceling and go w/ him for he would appreciate that you are willing to see him get help and be there when it takes place. If you truely care about him and don't want to lose him do this for and with him. I wish you the best of luck and let us know how he is doing from time to time. Hang in there and take care.
1 person likes this
@thuynhu (661)
• United States
17 May 08
It's pretty much every single thing that you have listed here. I talked to him about everything. I asked what could possible make him happy now, and he said his dad but that is something that can't happen. I try to tell him that he's not suppose to leave yet and he needs to be here for a reason or they wouldn't have been able to revive him. I love him dearly. I wish I could be with him and take him into counseling but I can't because I've already moved and I don't live near him anymore. I am however coming down to his area for my younger brother's graduation. And I'm going to go see him then but that's still a couple of weeks away. He's having problems and no one there to be with him that really cares about him. I just hope he doesn't do anything else before I get there. I just know if I was face to face with him it would be so much more useful. But I do appreciate your response in trying to help me help my friend. I will let you know how he's doing once he calls me back. Once again thank you.
1 person likes this
@thuynhu (661)
• United States
15 Jun 08
I just wanted to let you know that my friend is doing a lot better now. He has his days when he feels pretty down again, but he knows now to call me and talk to me. I just continue to be there for him as much as I can. I just hope he will stay safe, cause in a few months it will be hard for him to get in contact with me. I have to go to Korea cause my husband is getting stationed over there and I will be going with him. But I'm sure he will be fine and if not we always got the internet. I just wanted to let you know and thank you for you help.
@Remembering1996 (2219)
• United States
26 Nov 09
hey it was so good to hear back from you. I am glad to heat that your friend is doing better and i hope he continues to try and stay strong. I think with you talking with him is helping him keep positive. I do wish you the best of luck when you have to go over seas w/ your husband,just stand strong for you and your friend there and i will keep you both in my prayer take care and good luck!
@chivolaski (969)
• Philippines
17 May 08
maybe as a friend you can be the one to make him happy.
1 person likes this
@thuynhu (661)
• United States
17 May 08
I am trying my hardest to be that friend that can make him happy. I'm trying to convenience him of so much that there is still left for him to be here for. He's just so stubborn and difficult. I won't stop working with him of course. I just wish there were more people that would step up and be a true friend towards him. The more he has the more he's going to believe. But no matter what I will be there for him as much as I can.
1 person likes this
@teka44 (3420)
• Brazil
15 May 08
Hi thuynhu. I think that you need to give support to him and give time to him. Talk with him without force any confidence about what happened with him. Try to talk about good things and the beauty of the world and life. With the time he will say what happened and you can do something about or not, depending the case. But try to make sure that he understand that he make the difference for his friends and they need him.
good luck
1 person likes this
@thuynhu (661)
• United States
15 May 08
Thank you for your response. It's just so difficult. I was trying to talk to him about other things other than what he tried to do. He just kept bring it up and I would try to change the subject. I mean I will continue to try but not push him pass his limits. But I care for him and he knows that but he needs someone there with him. I'm trying to see if I can get a flight out there.
1 person likes this
@NuclearRabbit (650)
• United States
15 May 08
Just be a good friend. That's all you can do. I've been in this situation before both as a the friend and as the person. Depression is extremely hard to deal with and the biggest help is in knowing that you are loved and valued.
1 person likes this
@thuynhu (661)
• United States
15 May 08
Yeah, that's what I'm trying to be. I kept trying to tell him that I'm here for him. It's just so hard that I can't be there with him because I live somewhere else and I believe if I was there to comfort him it would be easier for him. I will pray for him at the most for now. And I hope to see him soon.
1 person likes this
