Say it isn't so!!!

Eh what a dilemma... I will say this in regards to him being very plain, looks don't matter in the long run because they fade. Does he treat her good? Does he love her? Is he is nice guy? I can definitely understand your concern, don't get me wrong and I DEFINITELY think that you should voice your concern to your friend because you don't want to see her walk into this knowing that you did nothing to voice your warnings or concerns before hand. If you see that a friend is headed for some train wreck, you want to be able to save her from it. I think that she should not marry him if she doesn't love him. Marriage is nothing something to fool around with. It's not a game. In fact, it's a lot of hard work and giving and sometimes, it's even sacrificing. She doesn't want a divorce on her hands because it's something that can physically and emotional draining. Trust me, I have been through one and it's not something that I would recommend... I think you need to talk to her and express the importance of all this. Too many people these days go into marriage with a very casual "whatever happens, happens" attitude. They think that if it doesn't work out they can just get a divorce but that's why there are so many divorces in this world, because of this attitude. Trust me, you want to talk to her because you just may be able to save her from the biggest mistake of her life...

Thats a tough situation. But just be sure to find out if she really is in love with this man. If she is, even if you say something about it, she would take it as an offence , and you might loose her freindship too. But if she isnt sure about it, just speak ur heart out, in a more gentle n subtle way, in a sense of you mean her just to be happy. If she gets the point, well and good 4 her. But please whatever you do, just do it fast, before anything happens, where she cant get out of the situation....

As long as he treats her well then I don't think there is any problem with him. Dunderheads need love too. If she is having second thoughts i would be concerned about that. I was ask her if she is sure she is ready to get married and tell her its not too late to change her mind...much better now than after they get married. I would avoid saying anything negative about her fiance.

ah love, its definitely blind and deaf! i know a girl that got married (she worked at my company briefly) and everyone told her she was making a mistake, but did she listen? NO and they got divorced WITHIN THE YEAR! you can try and talk to her, but chances are she wont listen anyways!

Let me ask you, how close are your relationship with your friend? Do you know her well inside out? If you know her well enough, you should be able to know whether she can handle anything that you want to tell her, good or bad. Honestly, I think you should tell her about what you think. Find a good time and tell her.

In my lifes experience I have always thought that friends tell friends everything. If you have concerns bring them to her, just don't call him names lol. A real friend respects your opinion, after all you love her and I am sure she knows this. There may be many things in her relationship that you do not know, yes including really good things. Opposites do attract. If you believe she has a self esteem issue perhaps joining her in a social group would help her to get her esteem. It does sound from what you have said that she is just settling. I would tell her that you believe that it would be better to wait until she knows herself and what she really wants. After all if they really love one another waiting to get married would not effect the relationship as a matter of fact it should make it stronger.

If she will listen to your opinion without getting her feelings hurt, it won't hurt to explain your concerns. Be sure to remind her what you are telling her is from your heart because you care so much about her and her well being. Unfortunately, some people have to learn the hard way and follow through with poor decisions only to find out later it was a big mistake. Good luck with this situation, carolbee

i think you should tell your friend how you feel if she is marrying him just too marry him then i dont think that is right if she is not in love with him or does not have strong feeling for him then i feel that she should not do it because if he is not her true soul mate then she will be miserable and unhappy for the rest of life and i dont want that for her and i know you dont want that for her either but i would be gentle about it but i feel that if you are true friend true friends tell there friends the truth no matter the cost!!!!!

Maybe she is waiting for someone to say something to her about it, sometimes people will shrug off a bad feeling but then when someone else notices it they are happy to open up and finally talk about it.

i support you to tell your friend your worries. i don't think this will ruin your friendship. you have worries that's all because you are concerned with her. a good medicine tasteds bitter. maybe it's hard for her accept different opinions, but absolutely it does good to her. anyway, marriage is very important in a woman's life. it's good for her to think it twice before getting married. you can tell her why you think that guy is not the one for her and ask her why she wants to marry him. of course, please don't call him dunderhead during your talking. she may get angry. :) oh, your friend is so lucky to have such a perfect friend like you. hope both of you can be happy everyday. :D

Hi there, My advise is: ask your friend if he really loves the guy and will take the risk of marrying him. Give your friend a preview of possibility and be watchful for her reaction. If she is in doubt she can't answer you sincerely and be aware of that. But if she said, she loves the guy and willing to take risk of everything, then hold your hands off, it's only your friend who knows better but still insist to her the precautions. Goodluck

i think you should speak to her and let no how you feel about the marriage. but to retain a friendship you give her support. sometimes you have to let that person make their own decision. joey45

Get in der and save your friend ship. you never know how important friends are until their gone