Should custodial parents receiving support have to report how it is spent?

In this particular case - no, the children were not being well cared for. They did not have the things they needed. They were not to eat certain food in the refrigerator because that supposedly "belonged" to their step-father. They were told not to eat too much because she didn't want them to out-grow their clothes (one daughter is now battling anorexia). When we saw that they didn't have proper clothing, we would take them shopping for clothes, but then she would object to the clothing we purchased for them and say that she wanted us to give her the money (in addition to the support) and she would purchase the clothes.(NOT!) I do think, however, that as long as you are receiving money from the other parent to support the children, you are going to be under some scrutiny, either from the other parent or if required, by the court system.

I don't agree with child support not including some housing/other costs. The father of my three children walked away and gets to live as he wants. ******If I were not the custodial parent, I would live in a much smaller, much cheaper place. I'd probably be living in a one bedroom apartment instead of the three bedroom we live in now. I aslo would not drive as much, taking the kids to school, etc***** When someone is not the custodial parent (especially when they walk away and have nothing to do with their kids), they are able to live as they want. When you're the custodial parent, you have to live differently. Now I wouldn't change it for the world because I love my children but the custodial parent has to do a lot more for the child for the non custodial (in a case where the father isn't involved). As it is now, I pay more towards their living and needs then the little support he is forced to pay out of his check (which has dropped to $49 since my last post). So besides paying to take care of them, I am there to offer emotional support, I'm the one that is up all night when they are sick, etc. Yes, I CHOOSE to do this because I believe in not abandoning your family and after being with them since birth, I don't see how anyone could walk away. So in the case where the non custodial parent isn't involved, I do think some of it should go towards housing and gas (I run the kids all over town to various activities so they'll have some semblance of a normal life.) as well as clothing, food. The custodial parent has to do a heck of a lot more then the non custodial parent.

It would be an interesting study to pursue - to see just how many can account for how they spend the support and how many can show that they're also spending a substantial amount of their own funds to support the children. In my opinion, it should be about a 50/50 split where the custodial parent pays for half of what the child needs with the support but provides the other half themselves. Since the custodial parents has to provide a home, utilities, transportation, etc. for themselves regardless of whether or not they have custody of the children, I do not feel that those expenses should be covered by child support.

So what part of providing for the child is the custodial parent's responsibility? If the child support is supposed to cover the expenses to care for the child - what financial obligation does that parent have?

If the courts has ordered 35.00 a week child support, the custodial parent has every right to apply that money where ever it is needed. If it is an electric bill so be it. To have people account for the support to the court might be a good idea in theory but its going to be easy for the Custodial parent to account for the money. all you would have to do is produce a rent receipt.. I am not sure what you are asking? The custodial parent has the remaining obligation past the $35.00. 35 is just a number I am using as an example.

It is my opinion that when a parent is granted physical custody of a child, that parent takes on the responsibility of providing at the very minimum - food and shelter. They, themselves, must have a place to live and pay the utilities and expenses of that home, whether or not the child lives with them. Why, then, should the non-custodial parent be responsible for paying for those expenses?

I'd say it would depend on the reason. I only know this from my experience of being my kids sole support, the laws are totally screwed up when it comes to child support. The wants of the parents seem to overtake the needs of the child at times.

I tend to feel that if the non-custodial parent is being required to pay a substantial amount of child support plus buying clothes and other necessary items for the child in order for them to be properly cared for and clothed - and the custodial parent is doing little or nothing to provide for the support of the child - why not just give custody of the child to the parent who can provide for them?

You are to be commended for not letting your son know that his father wasn't contributing to his support. I also received very little from my children's father but preferred it that way - if he didn't pay anything, I felt that I didn't owe him anything - include explanations as to how I spent my money! It really makes you wonder, if you're paying half of everything plus the support - what exactly is she paying for, and is she using the child support to pay her half of the expenses - which would actually mean that you are paying for everything!

I have to agree that I don't think its a good idea for the custodial parent to become dependent on the child support to meet their expenses - the money is for the child - not to pay the parent's bills.

That's probably another area that should actually be outlined by the court. When you file for and receive custody of a child, what obligations do you actually have - what things should you be providing from your own funds.

I feel that when you take custody of the child, you take on a certain amount of financial responsibility to provide the home for the child - and that should come from the custodial parent's own funds. It should not be up to the non-custodial parent to pay for their house, utilities, food, or vehicles.

I would also think that they would be more than willing to do it if they're spending it correctly. It may be that the courts also need to outline for the people receiving child support just what it should be used for.

I totally agree with your position. We experienced the same thing - the kids would come to our house with absolutely nothing, and complain that mommy didn't have any money to buy them clothes or shoes. On one occasion, she took DH back to court for more child support and when the judge asked her why she needed more money - she actually told him that they had purchased a new car and needed more support to make the payments - he laughed in her face and refused her request! We were required to provide health insurance coverage for the children, but rather than take them to the doctor's office when they were sick, she would wait until the middle of the night and take them to the emergency room (when it wasn't an emergency). Our insurance company picked up on what she was doing and canceled our insurance - including the coverage on my children as well!

Oh wow Newtondak, How did you resolve that situation about the medical insurance? That had to have been a big blow to you and your family from what your son's ex did to create that mess for you.