How does it make you feel?
By santuccie
@santuccie (3384)
United States
May 23, 2008 9:00pm CST
Minutes ago, I came across a discussion in which a member asked if it was possible to update information in their profile, because one of the fields gave a rather offensive impression by the way it was being displayed. One of the responders tells the OP exactly where to go (not yet certain as to whether this is the correct answer), and the problem is solved. There is a thank you, and a little dialogue between the two; but several hours later, this helpful myLotter has yet to receive BR!
To each their own, but I feel that a situation like this makes one's decision quite easy. If the question you ask involves a problem, and someone gives you an answer that visibly solves the problem, you pretty well know they gave you the right answer. In addition, resolving your discussions promptly is a heads-up for new visitors, who might otherwise think the problem still exists. Both the OP and the responder had "10" stars, so I doubt the OP is unaware of the BR script.
As few discussions as I have started since becoming a member, I still have some that are unresolved. But I am still waiting for someone to come along who answers my question, and will be happy to click that script when they do. When someone gives you exactly the answer you are looking for, do you give them BR? If not, is there something in particular that you are waiting for? How does it make you feel when you come across something like this?
6 people like this
8 responses
@Stiletto (4579)
•
24 May 08
I usually take ages to give a BR - months sometimes. To be honest this is mainly due to my tendency to procrastinate but I do also like to wait awhile to see what other responses will appear. There again I don't start many discussions which are looking for a specific answer. In fact I think I've only started one like that in which coincidentally you got the BR! I think on that occasion I did wrap it up quite quickly because the BR was going to the person that gave me the right answer. Usually it's not so clear cut.
2 people like this
@santuccie (3384)
• United States
24 May 08
Oh yeah, I think that was when we became friends, wasn't it? Thank you again. And yes, it's not always so clear cut as the instance I'm talking about, and also procrastination certainly does account for a lot of misunderstandings.
Perhaps I posted this discussion a bit too soon, but just look at the turnout! I'm not entirely sure, but I think this may be the very first time I've gotten two pages of responses...let alone in mere hours!
-santuccie
P.S.: Laughing at dumb jokes is still good for your health!!!
1 person likes this
@santuccie (3384)
• United States
26 May 08
I'm with you. I also have a discussion or two which remain unresolved, as I'm having difficulty choosing BR. In this case, I find it perfectly appropriate to wait and see if something even better comes along.
The case in point here was a discussion in which the OP was asking for technical assistance. In cases such as this, my personal inclination is to resolve the discussion as soon as a working solution is presented. That's all I was getting at.
I am pleased that most of this discussion (at least the second-tier responses) have been quite civil, when in fact this may prove more sensitive an issue than I'd anticipated. Perhaps I'd do well next time to make it clear that I don't feel so very strongly about this that I think the unnamed myLotter in question should be dragged out into the street and shot. It just occurred to me on the spur of the moment that I could start a discussion on this topic. Thanks again for commenting!
-santuccie
P.S.: Laughing at dumb jokes is still good for your health!!!
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
25 May 08
I don't tend to start a ton of discussions. Sometimes I just respond to a slew and comment on other posts in the thread, as I like to read everything to see the whole tone of responses. I am guilty of not choosing a BR for some of my discussions because when I look at them, there isn't really a best that stands out. I have a discussion I started just this morning which is sort of like that, just asking for input about how others would feel about a situation. There's no right or wrong there, so I don't know that I'll be choosing a BR right away even though I've noticed a lot of responses coming in.
1 person likes this
@mentalward (14690)
• United States
24 May 08
It doesn't bother me not receiving a BR. They're nice to get, but if I don't get them, it's okay. I believe the member who posed the question may have plenty of reasons why they didn't give a BR. They may be new and haven't discovered that yet. Or they may have other, more pressing things that they have to do right after receiving the response. Their house may have caught on fire (heaven forbid!). You just never know.
I'm here solely for the comeraderie. I love talking to people, meeting new people, and discussing ideas and concerns. Points, stars, best responses, they're insignficant compared to the real reason I'm here.
2 people like this
@santuccie (3384)
• United States
24 May 08
I really like the points you make here, very perceptive. Thank you for the response!
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
25 May 08
Despite this being a question and answer type forum, it's a social site. People who are not social are not likely to come here or if they do, they won't enjoy it. I have been surprised and gotten warm fuzzies from receiving BR, although I never came here with the intention of trying to get them. You never know who is going to find your response helpful or not, who is going to agree or not, and what people may take away from a discussion. It's just nice to have a place to do this and share and read openly. The recognition is a perk but not the most important. The friendships and social things are what keeps me logging in here time and time again.
1 person likes this
@santuccie (3384)
• United States
26 May 08
I agree, but in this instance I am speaking from the OP's perspective. As a responder, I too value the discussion itself and the relationships. If I didn't, I wouldn't be here. I've posted in over 1,500 threads here in myLot, and not so much as 50 of them are my own discussions.
But when I am the OP, while I do take for granted that responses by and large come from genuine interest as opposed to self interest, I think it goes without saying that the reason we have the BR links are so we can recognize outstanding posts. And again, when the opening solicitation is essentially for a solution to a technical problem, the responses in this case are pass/fail.
As soon as someone provides a working solution, the discussion has been officially resolved. In this case, the BR is good not only for recognition, but also as a heads-up to new visitors that the discussion has in fact been resolved. Anyway, to each their own. Thanks for the comment!
@wisconsin26 (3859)
• United States
25 May 08
sometimes people including me are looking for a certain answer and if someone hasn't gave that answer they won't give best response... I don't find anything wrong with that and or they are giving more people chances to reply to the topic.. Sometimes people won't reply to a discussion if there is already a best response... Those are the only things I can really think of right now...
1 person likes this
@santuccie (3384)
• United States
25 May 08
Hi wisconsin26,
Thank you; these are good points you make. It's good to see you around. Lots of luvs!
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
24 May 08
I am driven by instincts and when ever I come across a good response I mark it the best. But there have been times when I had to wait for long until I come across the right one. And some other times I have to bite my hands when I get just right on responses after marking the BR. I wish I could give more than one BRs.
Having said this, even though it feels great to be marked the best it doesn't bother me much on not getting any.
Thanks.
1 person likes this
@santuccie (3384)
• United States
24 May 08
It sounds as though you think a lot like me. I too sometimes wish I could recognize more than one person, or even give two or three "kudos." Also, what really vexes me is when the person to whom I would like to give BR has only posted a comment on someone else's post!
Like you, while I appreciate validation, I don't expect it. But from the OP position, I try to give it when I can, and using my best judgment. Thanks for your response!
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
24 May 08
Yes that makes two of us certainly. And yes I agree, some ppl make good points as a comment to others' responses. That is even more nail biting. lol...
BTW, Santuccie, what is OP? I couldn't get it. I'm kinda dumb...lol..
1 person likes this
@minnie_98214 (10557)
• United States
24 May 08
I think some people have their routines they like to follow. I for one will usually give out Best responses after a few days. Most people I know on Mylot dont always pay attention to if best response was given or not. I think I know of which discussion you are talking about and this person will give that person the credit without doubt.
1 person likes this
@santuccie (3384)
• United States
24 May 08
A quick glimpse at your profile suggests to me that you would be among the first to have seen the discussion I refer to. I'm glad to hear it. Thank you for responding!
-santuccie
P.S.: Laughing at dumb jokes is still good for your health!!!
P.P.S.: Is that you in the avatar?
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
24 May 08
Are you publicly talking about me behind my back? I am such a procrastonator. I have a discussion right now that gave me some very very good and helpful advice that I need to return to and give a BR on. It is obvious...like you say. Why do I procrastinate? I have no Idea but your discussion echoed my bad habits. I'll go fix that right now. sorry.
1 person likes this
@santuccie (3384)
• United States
24 May 08
No, I wasn't actually talking about you. But thank you for responding!
@kenzie45230 (3560)
• United States
24 May 08
I haven't been here that long, and I honestly didn't know at first that there was such a thing as best response. I've not seen that done on any other site where I've been a member.
When I did find out, it was from a discussion like this one. I had never noticed it on discussions I had joined, nor on the ones I started. After having it pointed out, I started doing best responses, of course.
But I also liked some of the people's responses to that other post. They said that they usually waited a day or two before giving best response. I think that makes sense.
1 person likes this
@hcpoirot (1562)
• Indonesia
24 May 08
OMG, if I havent read this discussion, I will not know that I havent check my Unresolved discusion for over ten days. usually I wait for a few days before giving any BR. sometimes I do not get the response I hope in my topic discussion. Now must go to check a few BR.
1 person likes this