Wedding question...
By MPFountain
@MPFountain (33)
United States
June 5, 2008 11:06am CST
I'm not anywhere near ready for a wedding, my boyfriend and I have talked about getting married and I know he's the one for me. I had a dream the other night that we got married and it's gotten me thinking about our actual wedding. Even though it'll be a few years down the road. Let me explain a little before asking my question. I have very little patience for children. I'm only 21, never really been around kids until the past year or so. And I've discovered I don't really like kids. I've been spending every day with a 5 year old child, only to grown to highly dislike him. And other kids too...I just don't like them. If that makes me a bad person, so be it. I just don't like kids. I'm sure it'll be different if I have my own. But for now...no. Aaaanywho...I went to my boyfriend's cousin's wedding and it was littered with kids. In the ceremony and running crazy all during the reception. The kids didn't do what they were told during the ceremony, refused to walk, cried, went the wrong side, etc...and during the reception pitched fits about the food, about everything really. Everyone thinks this is cute...but I think it ruined the wedding. Even the preacher told the bride not to worry if the kids weren't perfect, everyone just laughs and thinks it's cute. I don't. I honestly think it ruins a wedding.
So my question...is it rude to not have children at the wedding at all? Not in the ceremony, not at the reception, nowhere. It would prevent me stress and give the parents a nice little night away. And given in ample time to make plans for the kids, of course...is that bad to do though? Because in every wedding like ever...there's kids in it, as flower girls, ring bearers, whatever. I don't want that though. I don't want the parents thinking I'm rude or it's particularly against their kids or anything like that.
1 person likes this
5 responses
@CheshireKat (564)
• United States
5 Jun 08
I'm glad I'm not the only one who dislikes children. I'm not thinking so far as a wedding and making it 'no kids allowed', but I definitely don't like the thought of ever having children.
I think my guy is the same way, though. We don't really think kids are cute. When they are annoying/do annoying things/are loud & unruly, we take it for what it is, loud & unruly, usually annoying behavior.
I think the way for you to avoid parents thinking that you have something against -their- child specifically is to just make it apparent that there will be no kids allowed. If -no- children are permitted, rather than just specific kids, they can't claim that you dislike theirs or have something against them personally.
1 person likes this
@spalladino (17891)
• United States
5 Jun 08
Another way to avoid having children at your wedding and reception is to have an evening wedding...I think candlelight ceremonies are so romantic. Indicate on the invitations that it's an Adult's Only affair and be done with it. If anyone calls and asks if they can bring Little Johnny because of A, B or C reason simply tell them that you're sorry but this has been planned as an adults only affair so, no, the child cannot come.
@nicholejade (2430)
• Canada
5 Jun 08
You are not being rude at all. Some people have weddings that are strictly just for adults with no little tikes running around. I have been to many weddings that had no kids in the wedding, the reception etc. It is ultimately up to you what you want. It is your day and no one elses. Yesme people will be upset about it but it is your day and you have and do what you want. Let no one tell you what you should have.
@azizanightshade (41)
• United States
5 Jun 08
i agree with you. i don't want a flower girl/ring bearer in my wedding. i would prefer and adult reception as well (meaning 13 and up because by then you are old enough to act properly and sit still). i think that as long as it's stated on the save the date cards and the invitations in a polite manner then there should be no problem. if the parents have a problem with not brining their kids, then they don't have to attend. weddings are only mandatory for the bride, groom and wedding party.
this is you and your boyfriends day, plan it the way you want to. just avoid being a bridezilla.....
1 person likes this
@ShealM (388)
• Canada
5 Jun 08
I am a very your day, your way type of person. I'm getting married in August and the ceremony is not kid free but the reception is kid free. We have lunatics for family members when drinking (and sober for some) and I liken that kind of situation witnessed by children as emotional, mental and environmental abuse of children. Young children do not need to be put in that type of situation at all.
I say do it your way. On the reception card you can have "Adult Reception" printed on it so there is no confusion about it at all or the RSVP cards can already have the number of people attending with a accept or regret to check off.
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