How am I going to cope being single??
By abibramwell
@abibramwell (23)
June 6, 2008 3:39am CST
Hi all,
Me and my boyfriend have been fighting for months now since i lost our baby at 11 weeks, There are no words to explain how I have been feeling and all i wanted was some support from him or some kind of understanding....We have a beautiful son who is 3 next month and i have felt so strange towards him since I lost our baby...I love him more than anything in the world hes such a little angel and i hav ried so hard not to let his see me upset so i think it has made me pass all my anger to my boyfriend....I need him to love me and understand how i have been feeling....After bleeding for a week sold while we were on holiday at disney land i gave birth to the dead baby and i held her...She was so tiny and had no legs left but she had a face and her ears and arms were there still...I was so brave and burried her under the tree i planted for her all alone he wouldnt come..But now he says he doesnt want to be with me he says i am horrible to him, useless and i need to go to a mental hospital...I feel totaly devistated and i will admit i do snap at him but only because he acts like a teenage boy..He works 12 hr shifts and i know he is tired but he does nothing to help, If I have been at work or out for the day with our son he is furious because I have not tidyed the house, he has been going out after work and not comming home till lunch time the next day and spendin all our money which believe you me we dont have very much at all.
Now he says I have to leave because his is his house and he pays the rent..Im totally devistated, that was 2 days ago and now he just physically wont talk to me...I feel like an imposter in my own home and dont know what I am going to do...I have never felt so empty before i carnt get over it...I always thought wed be together forever and I never wanted our son to have to go through this.
What shall i do stan me ground not leave? I dont have any energy to grovel to him or just stay with my parents but i have just found out i am 3 weeks pregnant....What shall i do?i carnt tell him because he will just think i am making it up. im a mess
1 response
@weepinwillow (107)
• Philippines
6 Jun 08
Hi Abibramwell. Please be strong. And keep the faith.
You need to think about things for a while. You need a clear mind before making a decision. Spend some time alone, talk to a friend, or be with the people you love aside from your boyfriend so that you'd have a relaxed mind and heart. Then think of how you feel, what you want, and how you will tell your husband about these. It's important that you get some space at the moment. I think you're both suffocated by a lot of misunderstandings. What you're both going through is really tough. You may both be breaking down.
This is just a phase. You both must get your act together because this is your family at stake. Maybe you're both burnt out because of the little and big problems that you have -- bills, rent, then the loss of a baby girl. You must get past this. It just takes patience and a lot of thinking, good timing and serious talk.
So get away for a day or two. Think. Then talk. Don't push it if he doesn't want to yet. He will come around. When he's ready to talk that's when you tell him everything. And that you're pregnant again. Don't give up. But don't push it too.
I am positive this will work out. Please keep us posted okay?
@abibramwell (23)
•
6 Jun 08
Thank you weepinwillow that message was loverly....I will let you know whats happening
xx
