WHICH HURTS MORE? I am in that position now... :(

That so called friend was never really a friend to you anyway or they would have never done that to you. You have seen that person for who he really is. He doesn't deserve YOUR friendship.

good day. Betrayal would always cut the deepest because it came from someone that meant something to you, the least expected enemy so to speak. It's like what ceasar said you too, brutus?. At least with a known nemesis you can expect nothing but ill will however you can still have a degree of respect from each other. You can hate each other openly but can openly respect each other as well, Whereas from a traitor you can expect neither.

I have had friends in the past that have done this to me. Or traders two faced people I hate worser then anything. So I agree with you on this.

Having a friend turn their back on you is the worst position there is. But, there's also something else you should think about and ask yourself. There might be truth as to why your friend would like to take the enemy's side, maybe you're wrong.. or maybe, she's not really your friend in the first place. A friend may not take your side all the time but she never should take the side of another person, specially not your enemy ~ that's so immature. So you should be glad, because finally you see your so-called 'friends' color. But try to think too, why does she need to take sides? Maybe you're being a B*tch that's why she took the side of your enemy. Well that's just me.

I am sorry that this has happened to you. It is sad when things like this happen because you find out the one you thought was a friend is not really one at all. I had problems with my friends as well, until I found out they weren't truly my friends. I hope that you heal from this betrayal soon, and remember you'll find better friends. As for which hurts more, I would have to say that the second one would hurt worst. Have a Great day.

hi jhordie i fully agree with u as it is an enemy is expected to be rude so we r more or less prepared for it and to some extent it does not bother as well but someone whom u trust and love turns his/her back on u that really hurts a lot it is like stabbing someone in the back...i dont expect every friend of mine to support me in every decision of mine..i m always open to suggestions but if i see my frind join hands against me i will feel terrible..probably not the right friend..w come across all kind of pp in our lives just take it as a learning experience...take care..

the friend turning is worse. who cares what an enemy thinks,they were never your friend. but a friend doing it is more of a betrayal.

i agree with you. .. maybe they're so insecure about you that's they they do evil things like that. just don't mind those losers but instead try to find ways that you think will make them more jealous at you.

having your friend turn against you is the worst agreed, but why did your friend turn against you? have you'asked yourself that question? How did this enemy bit come about' in the first place? did you have anything to do withe making this person your enemy? for everything there are reasons. and I do not see the reasons here.why does that person hate you? did you do anything to make that person hate you?

Hi Jhordie. I am sorry to know that you had this kind of treason happened with you. It is the worst thing that can happen with someone. The same happened with me some times and it is the worst pain we can feel because you love your friend and trust him. We feel much more pain with a treator friend than any thing other person can make for us. But now you know that this person never been your friend and it is good because you can avoid for another treason. When I am a friend of someone I ever stay side by side with him/her no matter what happen. If I desagree with something I tell him/her when we are alone, but NEVER in front of a enemy. Seems that your enemy is better than you friend. Your enemy have a honesty to be your enemy openly. Well my friend I really am sorry for you but it happen in life and all is a big lesson for us. Learn with your pain and pick better your friends the next time. Cheers and good luck. PS. You have a friend here maybe not very good but ever your friend.

it is oki jhordie,,,i will feel more pain knowing my friend sided with my enemy...but if she is truelly your friend then just let her be...everything will be fine sooner or later!God Bless!

I'm sorry to hear about that. I haven't been in this situation but the feeling of being backstabbed by a friend is as good as being backstabbed in reality. I think it's very painful. It's ok to be emotional and people here in myLot are willing to share your load. We're one big happy family after all. So how have you been doing and how did you deal with your friend? God bless you! Cheers!

i cant choose because both of them have no rights to be called a friend anymore... but id rather avoid them.. and just pray for them....

don't fret jhordie! if you're meant to be friends with your friend forever, things will work out fine and things will become better... if you are not meant to be friends for life, just let things be...a better friend will be coming your way!!!

Betrayal- something dat one never xpects frm a frnd. Truely to say, its a bliss to have worthy , gud n loving fnrd aroung us. World is so big n people are so many that one's lyf tym is never enough to knw n understand a person totally. Let frnds come n go, learn gud frm them leaving all the bad behind, because there are lotz of thing to b done n u r never given enough tym n never waste tym who doesn't know ur value n never waste ur tym for those who are not worthy of it.

Hello Jhordie, I will also choose the second one like you. That is truly painful to think that we need this friend most in this moment, but, on the other hand, if this will happen to me, I will be thankful too since I found out his/her real color or attitude and will not ever trust this person back. I will continue to fight for my right and pray that soon, they will both realize that they are wrong!

I cried when I read your post. I have been in such a similar situation, before. And there are no easy answers. Please do not fear to share your feelings. Often times, when you keep the sadness inside your heart, it feels like a heavy stone pressing against your chest. I do not know the particulars of your situation, but my heart goes out to you. But, I have been in the same spot as you. My best friend was also in a similar situation and I will use her situation as an example, if I might. My best friend's sister in law makes her life miserable daily. She constantly harrasses my best friend and holds accuses her of infidelity. She says that she is a bad mother, though that is not true. She doesn't give her any peace. My best friend has often confided to me how much pain this other woman causes her. She says that she would leave, but she doesn't believe in divorce and might lose her children in the divorce. It's a very harsh situation. She is always sad. Her husband, makes the problem worse. He should be on his wife's side and defend his wife (my best friend). But, instead, he stands back and allows a stranger into his marriage to do damage. He used to be her best friend, but now refuses to make his sister behave and treat his wife with respect. I have always believed that secretly he enjoys watcheing his wife being harrassed, because he doesn't love her anymore. He's not a very nice man, from what I hear. But, he stays in his marriage because of his children. I have tried to advise her not to deal with her sister in law at all. But, the woman keeps coming over to her house. And, she won't cut ties with the woman. This past year, my best friend allowed her sister in law to baby sit her children and while at her house, she slapped one of my friends children because she asked for candy. And, then she stormed over to my friends home and threatened to call the police and report her and have her children taken away, because she allows them candy. It took that horrible situation for my friend to see that she could never do anything to appease her enemy. The worst part of this whole thing is that my friends husband, who should be on her side, defends his sister. She needs support. But, she does not have any. I am not sure if you are in a similar situation. Or, if your aggressor is a family member, friend or employer. But, it is not fair that you would have to put up with a bad person in your life and then have a friend betray you, too. Perhaps your friend could not see any way out of the torment, but to step into the fire. Once I was bullied by a school girl in my class. And, she would push me into the mud daily and call me bad names. And, then another girl started doing the same thing. So, one day I made friends with the one girl bully and told her the bad things that the other girl was saying behind her back. By befriending my bully, I got peace from both. Neither girl bothered me again. I am sorry to say that was the only method that I had for handling the situation. I had to betray myself and not stand up, because I wasn't strong. I felt alone and abandoned and could not simply allow myself to be bullied or pushed down anymore. I feared for my life. So, I made the choice to side with the aggressor. And, by doing so, she stopped hating me. Perhaps this is what your friend is doing. Maybe he or she does not see a way out and thinks that being friends with your enemy will allow them relief. I cannot say. What's in your friend's heart? Maybe you'll never know. You will feel the sting of betrayal for a good long while. And, nothing but time will heal that wound. My best advice would be to accept what has happened, pray for guidance and allow Him to lead your path. I am a spiritual person and this has always helped me in my worst times. I have survived some of the meanest people on the planet and worst friend betrayals. I hope that this advice helps you. Be well! I wish that I had the words to soothe the pain of hurt and rejection and betrayal. I have felt this sting of rejection too when my family members have turned against me and sided with people that have hurt me. All I can say is that maybe God has a bigger plan for you that does not involve either the aggressor or your friend. Maybe he is working the situation to allow you to leave or make a big change that would put you in charge of the aggressor. Perhaps events will work in your favor sooner than you believe. This is often the same true with many other people's situations. Often a person will have a sister in law or brother in law whom they must see everyday. And, that person torments them with insults and hurtful comments. They cannot simply leave town to avoid the person, because they would have to leave their children and family. My heart cries for you. I will keep Jhordie in my prayers. And, ask God to keep Jhordie safe from this aggressor and to return lost friends and family. Be well. Blessings upon you.

I don't know the whole story, but if you are correct in the story than perhaps the friend was not your friend after all, right ? Take care friend, and the only advice that i can give is... don't worry about that too much - relax, take it easy.

I know this feeling even too much. Mine best friend done the same thing once. I've trusted him for all those years and all he done then was abbandoning me without any word of goodbye. Just like our friendship would never exist. Talk to this friend and ask him why is he doing this. Maybe he is manipulated, or he was seeing something that you can't but should. Mine cases hurted me so much that I've jumped to conclusions first time in my life and I trully regret it today. Don't make such mistake like mine and find the true reason why this happened. I hope you will feel better soon. Cheers.

i agree with you and i prefer the second one.