living together before marriage
By clandestinef
@clandestinef (88)
Philippines
June 14, 2008 7:54pm CST
Living together before marriage?
Who's for it and who isn't? I'm for living togetehr so you can see if you can stand each other under one roof haha. What I HATE is the people who say you living in sin even though they did teh same thing at a younger age.SO guys give me some of your view, if your are for marriage rather than living together first? Which is which for you?ALL response are welcome.
4 people like this
18 responses
@webeishere (36313)
• United States
15 Jun 08
My wife and I lived together for 5 years before we married. We have now been married a great 30 years and together 35.
www.asstr.org
2 people like this
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
15 Jun 08
I think that living together before marriage is a great idea, and it enables the couple to see how they interact while in their home. I live with my fiance and his parents, and I would have to say that living here with him has enlightened me to his daily habits and who he is while in his own sanctuary.
I actually moved in with him about a month after I met him, give a few days. We knew from the beginning of our relationship that we had found "the one" but living together has really made the icing on the cake that much more sweeter.
I can understand where people might say that it is sinful, and can also understand where older generations would disagree, however I have also wondered how they feel this way if they have lived with their husband before their marriage. Times have changed, and people do too but one must learn from their own mistakes.
1 person likes this
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
16 Jun 08
I agree that without consent from the parent's. I have consent from his parent's, and I did make sure that it was okay with them before I moved in.
1 person likes this
@danishcanadian (28955)
• Canada
15 Jun 08
Had my husband and I not lived together first, our marriage would never have lasted!!! We needed to know how well we would work together, before making any commitments.
1 person likes this
@Elixiress (3878)
•
15 Jun 08
I am definitely for it. Even if you manage to find "the one" then you should still be aware that they will not be perfect as no one is, so you should live with them to see if they have any bad habits that you would not be able to put up with for the rest of your life. The rest of your life is important here as people that do not live with their partner before marriage tend to be the people that believe in marriage for life and would not dream of getting a divorce.
@clandestinef (88)
• Philippines
15 Jun 08
yeah... this gives the opportunity of both person to know each others well and it reinforce them to be a stonger person with all the ups and downs on having a permanent family life being a couple.
@azizanightshade (41)
• United States
15 Jun 08
i'm currently living with my fiance, and i'm glad that i am. it gives both of us a chance to get used to being together and figure out who is going to do what (like finances, grocery shopping, etc).
i know some people that literally believe that you should stay at your parents house until you are married, whether or not you are single or in a relationship. of course this is my grandparents generation (the ones that had the baby boomers).
personally, i think that the best way to know if the relationship will work on a 24/7 basis is to be together 24/7; ie live together.
1 person likes this
@awapak (1275)
• Pakistan
30 Jun 08
I think all sorts of pre-marital relations are harmful to our society and morality.Complete Chastity is the solid base of a successful marriage life.Temporary relations should never be recommended and encouraged at any stage.
@maryannemax (12156)
• Sweden
16 Jun 08
my boyfriend and i just want to take things slowly and not pressure ourselves into getting married at the moment. we're living in for about a year now. everything's doing fine. we're able to know each other more day after day.
i used to be against the idea of "live-in" but now, i realized that's it's actually good for you and your partner and the future as well.
anne
@magnel (2263)
• India
15 Jun 08
Actually I don't agree to it that marriages has higher success rate if you stay with your partner for sometime before marriage.
What if you don't find him right, will you go on staying with everyone from time to time to find out the right person.
I don't think its necessary to stay together in one house. You can stay in touch, meet up everyday, share all your thoughts and views with the one you decide to spend your life with, that should do it.
@SheliaLee (2736)
• United States
15 Jun 08
Dear friend I know you aren't going to like what I say, but living together before marriage is sin according to the Bible. I am against living together before marriage because of this. I was a virgin when my husband and I got married. I am very proud of this fact, but that doesn't mean that if without prayers things couldn't have gotten out of hand because I was human. But I was determined in my heart to remain pure for my mate. When my husband and I got married I was very thankful to be able to look him in the eye and say on our wedding night was the first time for me. He has told me more than once over the 24 years that we have been married that he is glad I was a virgin when we got married.
@vaishalik (237)
• India
15 Jun 08
I will never agree with living together before marriage. There are so many other ways to understand eachother, sharing thoughts, dicussions, daily meeting, even calling on phone etc. I think marriage life is not like a piece of food, taste & through. I know some(here) are lucky, continued to living together. But what about others? Taste & through? Then how will you know the taste of HONEY & MOON?
@kun2349 (23381)
• Singapore
15 Jun 08
I'm for it.. As it prepares a couple the difficulties they are gonna face when they are married.. As with an additonal person living with u, everything is gonna change and be different.. Other than taking care of yourself, we will have to care about our partner's feelings and space too.. So it will be just nice a tiem to get used to all this things b4 marriage, solve them b4 it becomes worse after marriage..
@doctorgenius (558)
• India
15 Jun 08
Well..M all for Marriage..No Live Ins
I dont believe in any Live in sorta relation..N i share a common view wit my girlfriend
The institution of Marriage is a bond..A strong bond of Togetherness..Which cant b broken jz like that..Its a strong attachment..An emotional attachment n i dunno wat not
Basically marriage is a union of two sols..An Inseparable Union
Ofcourse there are Divorces but then there are negatives to everythin
ANywayz..I SUPPORT MARRIAGE..Coz of wat i sed n for a host or other reasons:)
@lazeebee (5461)
• Malaysia
15 Jun 08
It's fine (provided you are over 18, and so legally responsible for your actions). It's better than finding out that you are unsuitable for each other, after getting married and having kids. But then, there is no guarantee, that even after living together for umpteen years, that you will stay together after marriage. After all, people change through the years.
@hellcowboy (7374)
• United States
15 Jun 08
I think there is nothing wrong with living together before marriage,as long as you love the person,and plan on being with them forever,because it helps you and your partner learn to be a team,especially when it comes to getting used to expenses and stuff,me and my fiance currently live together at my parents house,and we have been engaged for like four months,and we are planning on getting married,sometime next year.
@slyvixen42 (926)
• United States
15 Jun 08
My fiancee technically lives with me. He needed a place to go after his living situation changed and my parents were kind enough to let him stay with us. I don't think it's necessarry though. Love is not being compatible in every way, it's a choice you make. If you love someone you'll be able to put up with the things that you don't like.
@wangchunlin (155)
• China
15 Jun 08
living together first then marriage.
living together first can let the two sides know whether they match or whether they can manage to get along.
but, be careful. not let a lovely baby appear before marriage...