I finally lost it on stupid parents last night.
By TriciaW
@TriciaW (2441)
United States
June 18, 2008 4:36pm CST
I have never gotten so angry at a game and never lost my cool like I did last night. As most know my daughter has dwarfism and yes people say things and I usually handle it well with a slight comment however last night was a whole different story. My daughter has played ball this being her 3rd year but her first for this experience. She got up to bat and the entire team started laughing at her. I have to say I was shocked at the behavior. I instantly saw her head go down and knew she was close to tears. I had been walking back up into the stands when I heard a mother say oh look at that little thing isn't it too funny. A little boy that is in my daughters class turned on the women and said there is nothing funny about it. I held my tongue and sat down when a mother finally said how old do you think she is. I turned to the women behind me and said she is 13 years old she had dwarfism and I have never seen such bad sportsmanship in a group as I am seeing right now. Now dare they laugh at her. The mom so they were laughing at her. I lost it and said bullsh.. and turned back around. I could feel the anger growing in me. It should have stopped there but the women would not shut up. They kept saying our girls are not rude they weren't laughing at her. This went on the whole inning. I finally said I have to go down before I hit the Bit.. I then went over to the coach of the other team and told him who I was and told him that it was bad sportsmanship and explained my daughter's condition. He instantly said he was sorry and explained he had a child with autism and he understood why I was upset. He then asked if my daughter would play ball in a special league they have in the city for kids with special needs. Anyway.. my daughter came over to me when the game ended and said mom they all laughed at me and burst into tears. It broke my heart. She had held it in for so long but she no longer could. She sob and I held her telling that I understood how it hurt her feelings and told her they were wrong for doing it. Suddenly we had all the parents and kids from our team around us telling my daughter how much they loved her and how wonderful she was. Of course I had tears too. It was just an awful thing and I was so angry and hurt so bad for my daughter. It was a good thing her dad wasn't in the stands he was out umping and had already told the girls by him to stop with the laughing but in a nice way. I can't say I regret getting mad but I do wish I would have said a few more things to those mothers that have taught their children to have no respect for others. Anyway just needed to vent again I guess. We have a game tonight and I am sure it will go much better as this team has played us before and didn't have any issues. My daughter was nervous about it until I reminded her she already knew these girls.
6 people like this
20 responses
@RebeccaLynn (2256)
• United States
18 Jun 08
Oh! That brought tears to my eyes.
I am so sorry that people can be so awful to a child. She must have been so hurt.
I too, wish you had said more. Maybe it would have opened their eyes a little bit.
You just keep on encouraging her and next time, don't hold back. People should know how what they are doing is affecting you and your' daughter.
I hope she wins tonight!
2 people like this
@latriciajones (846)
• United States
18 Jun 08
you are a very strong woman for not going all the way with your anger. I would have probably gone to jail because i hate when people are so mean, especially when they dont even know whats going on. just tell your daughter to not even worry about people like that it's not her with the problem it them for being so immature.
2 people like this
@rmuxagirl (7548)
• United States
19 Jun 08
That is terrible that some parents allow their kids to behave in such a way let alone behave this way themselves! I would have said way more than you and said something to the coach, and I Would have said something to his suggestion because just because she has dwarfism doesn't mean she has special needs.
@TriciaW (2441)
• United States
19 Jun 08
Actually she does have special needs and we are ok with that. She has low motor skills and we do have to adjust things at home and school to assist her. We don't in softball and it does make it hard for her but she gives it her all. We are actually looking forward to playing in both leagues because it will give her more experience.
@dfollin (25391)
• United States
18 Jun 08
Iam so sorry that happened to you and your daughter.Children can be so rude,but it is even more of a shame when their parents are the ones who teach them to be rude and disrespectful to others.
@Countrymom (371)
• United States
18 Jun 08
what horrible behaviour! and coming from adults too at that! I am shocked that in this day and age people aren't more well mannered! I applaud you and your daughter for even making the effort. People like that are so rude and crass and I always hope that one day they will be the ones standing or sitting in judgment like they judged your poor daughter. Give your daughter a hug for me and tell her how proud I am of her! What an honor to be the parent of such a great teen!
1 person likes this
@flatlander (45)
• United States
19 Jun 08
OOooooohhh,this really rags meto no end!!! I have a younger brother who is handicapped and I have gone to bat for him both verbally and yes even once or twice physically in my younger years!! So I know how you feel!! I Hate ignorant people running their mouth.. My opinion- God listens God will punish! It may take time, but he does address the problem..My advise,Stand firm, chin high, carry on!! good job!!!!
@flatlander (45)
• United States
19 Jun 08
Sorry, This makes me so mad that I mis-spelled soldier, sorry, but its the message right!!!! Carry on little one..
@Thoroughrob (11742)
• United States
19 Jun 08
People can be very cruel. Sometimes I wonder where they were brought up. I hope she does not let this get to her too bad. You have every right to lose it sometimes. I think you handled it the best you could without being real nasty.
@CrashO (698)
• Romania
19 Jun 08
really dont know about dwarfism so sorry about that but I can imagine it, saw something similiar maybe it was like that, Its hard not to laugh about anything this days this kids or stair at her, I have no words i dont know really how I could react, probably I wouldn't laugh at her but I would give her a smile or a happy face :p
I have some problems with my eyes from birth and onces a girl same age at me was staring at my eyes and she kept screaming "don't look at me.." "omg, dont look at me, you scare me" .. thats after we have met a few times, and I liked her a little, of course she said it in a "happy 1v1 situation" of course, but she made me feel really wrong, like a monster or something, wasn't polite of her, probably the same thing felt your daughter, wish her the best plaing and may she be the best player out there!:)
good luck!
@miamilady (4910)
• United States
19 Jun 08
I really do feel for you and your daugther.
So many people are just so insensitive.
I never have understood that.
Sure, we all stick our foots in our mouths at times, but what those people did was inexcusable.
Even though the coach of the other team was more understanding once you went to talk to him. I'm suprised he hadn't shushed his team without being told anything. Adults should know better and they need to teach their kids.
I come from an insensitive family in many regards.
I have a tiny bit of understanding of what it feels like, but nothing like what you and your daughter have experienced.
You handled youself well in the stands. Those mothers were morons for denying what the kids were doing. As I said parents need to teach their children that we are all different and that we all deserve respect.
I hope your daughter doesn't have too many experiences like that.
I'm going to make a suggestion. You can decide if it works for you or not. You could request that the league that your daughter is in have your coaches explain your daughers situation the kids before the first games and tell the kids how they are expected to act and NOT act. In the future it might help avoid a situation like that.
My kids play sports and I think that at least one season something like that came up and that is how it was done.
Good luck and take care.
@TriciaW (2441)
• United States
19 Jun 08
I think that is why we were shocked this is her third season and have no clue how we have never played this town before now. In the 3 years we have never encountered this so never would have thought we needed to inform them in advance. Usually I get a parent saying how old is she or oh she is little how old is she and I tell them the situation and that is that. I did think that maybe I need to go and do a talk to their school on children with special needs but not sure if I will or not yet.
@Margajoe (4747)
• Germany
19 Jun 08
Hi!
It is not easy, but then again these people don't know what they are laughing about.
They are laughing because they don't understand.
The cannot put there selves in the situation.
I hope you don't have to go through that again.
Good thing you said something, and people were nice to her again.
Take care,
margajoe
@Elixiress (3878)
•
19 Jun 08
Many children are not mean as they do not understand that some people have difficulties, but then again can you really blame the children when they have people like that Mam for role models? I think not. By the time you are a mother you should know that some people are born different and have problems out of the usual. I hope the game tonight goes okay.
@Remembering1996 (2219)
• United States
19 Jun 08
That is aweful how your daughter was laughed at like that. I know it can hurt her feelings tremendiously. Just because she has dwarfism doesn't mean she can't be just as a good player if better than the other players. I give her credit for stepping up to the plate and standing her ground to bat proudly even though deep in side she was crumbling. People can be so mean and hurtful and this just urkes me for who do they think they are? I'm glad that you were there to reassure her that those people were wrong in what they said and tried to help her feel better. I have seen some people like your daughter and I feel bad for them for I know that they get comments by others but in my mind they are special and god created them in his own image and loves them no matter what. I hope your daughter really can see the bright side of things when things like this happen and just try and smile and let what these people say go. I wish her the best of luck and take care.
@fluffnflowers (1594)
• United States
19 Jun 08
I'm sad to say that I'm not shocked to hear that adults acted in such a shameful, immature way. People wonder why they're not respected and then they act like that in front of their children. Talk about teaching respect and kindness!
Your daughter is going to grow up to be a very strong woman, and it sounds like she's stronger than just about any 13 year old that I've ever met. I'm sure you're very proud of her, but I must say that I'm extremely impressed that she was able to hold out until the end of the game! She must be a very tough cookie, and it must be very tiresome to have to constantly 'educate' people on tolerance and respecting differences.
@flatlander (45)
• United States
19 Jun 08
Me again.. Tell your Daughter she is one of Gods Children, here for a purpose, Hence she is one of Gods soldgers!! CARRY ON SOLDGER!!!!!!!!!!
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
18 Jun 08
tricia w that was so awful, how stupid can people be to laugh'at
a child because of her size, so terribly terribly unkind and to think parents seem to encourage our kids to make fun of anyone who is in any way different from themselves. Parents need to be
educated to think outside the box of waspism and know that different is not bad, and is not to be mocked or scorned but to'
love all people as themselves. None of us are really perfect but a lot of us do try to do unto others as we would have them do unto'us. I am crying as I type for your little daughter and how'
hurt she must have been.I do hope that this next game goes well
and that your daughter ends up being proud of herself. good luck and God bless.
@sudalunts (5523)
• United States
19 Jun 08
It breaks my heart at what you and your daughter went through. You would have been within your boundaries if you had said everything that was on your mouth.
How dare, them laugh at her.
Parents need to start teaching their children respect, and if the parents are acting like children, what do you expect from the kids.
Let your daughter know that she is very special, and can do everything anyone else can.
Please give her a biggggg hug from me.
God bless you and your family
@Nana530 (286)
• United States
19 Jun 08
This makes me so sad, and so mad. I was crying before I finished reading this. It's so hard to believe that in this day and age people can still be so cruel and so ignorant. I know when my granddaughter was still living, as her disease(Spinal Muscular Atrophy) progressed and she lost more and more movement; people would stare at her. It is infurating. Wonder why there are people who act this way? Don't they know how special your little girl is? May God bless you dear lady and all your family.
@honeydew82174 (1720)
• United States
19 Jun 08
You have some will power girl! I would have never been able to keep my mouth shut! I would have said what was on my mind. I happy to know your daughter knows she is loved and respect even when mean people tease her. Good Luck!
@nutthouse3 (63)
• United States
18 Jun 08
There is that old saying that the "apple doesn't fall far from the tree"! And I can guarantee you that those parents would be the first one to say their kids do nothing wrong or if someone did something to their kids they would be all hot and bothered about it!Your daughter has more class and will teach people the true meaning of
strength. What a precious gift you have. And we wonder what is wrong with kids today. It starts with the parents!
I can only hope that the coach pulled those girls from the next game.
You, yourself are very special, I don't think I would have been able to control myself. Your daughter is very lucky to have you for a Mom. I live by the rule of what comes around, goes around!
Believe me those ladies will get theirs in the end!God Bless you Both!!!
@Johnnypenn (237)
• United States
19 Jun 08
Gosh, I hate people like that. The only reason why they laughed is because they don't understand. I am glad that the team and the other kids parents tried to help your daughter feel better. I have a feeling this won't be her first experience with that sort of behavior.
I understand this too, I have a brother who has a disability in the head. The doctors told my Mum to put him in a mental isntitution because they said he wouldn't be able to live a normal life. My Mum said "hel.." to that and took him to therapy for seven years. He can do things well on his own, though we do have some problems. But not much.
I want you to know that I am glad you're in your kids corner. Always stay there and let her know that she can talk to you about anything. Open comunication is key! and love, lots of love..but your her Mom...so I expect that!