Do you really tell your partner everything?
By katsmeow1213
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
United States
June 30, 2008 5:47pm CST
I was thinking about something the other day. Thoughts that I have on a regular basis, and it dawned on me I've never told my husband of these thoughts. I won't either. It's nothing bad, as they're just thoughts and not something I'm actually doing behind his back, but I just choose not to share these thoughts with him, they're rather personal.
I had always said that I share everything with my husband and vice versa, but now I realize I don't. I do have my own private thoughts and feelings that actually nobody knows about.
So, think about it really hard. Do you really share everything with your partner, or do you have your own personal thoughts and feelings? You don't have to share those thoughts here, I just want to know if you have them.
5 people like this
36 responses
@wintersnow (1)
• China
1 Jul 08
In fact, I have personal thoughts and feelings. I think it's nature.Everyone have their own space. You needn't share evrything with your partner, but you should be honest to your partner. You can have your privacy, but you should be royal to your partner.
1 person likes this
@pillusch (1147)
• Mexico
1 Jul 08
Gee, no, I don't. And I do that for a simple reason: I want to keep my marriage intact. The same would apply with friends, aqcaintances, whoever. The saying 'Nobody is an island' is wrong, we are all islands, at least in some parts of our heads, and this is good so. As a man, I find it natural to fantazise about other women (the same applies viceversa, I guess.) My wife would hang me if I'd tell her. Now, I'm a faithful husband, but I'm still a man. So I'm pretty grateful for my privacy. It just wouldn't be healthy, for any type of relationship, to tell everything.
1 person likes this
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
31 Aug 08
honestly i do try to tell my partner everything he needs to know, there are just some minor things i think is not even worth talking about and that is what he is not aware of... if he asks by chance then i tell him, if he dont then he is not interested to know, so why bother.
@bobet17 (158)
• Philippines
1 Sep 08
My husband and I talk everything that happen to us everyday,We have a time for this because this is very Important in a relationship to know everything,we always talk before bedtime,I dont want to have secrets that I dont want to tell him,because he is the only one who help me,and understand me anytime,so for me Its better to share it our partner.
@GreenMoo (11834)
•
1 Jul 08
I'd be happy to admit to anyone, even my partner, that there are thoughts that I don't share. There are thoughts that are just idle ponderings and not worth sharing, there are those that might hurt feelings if shared, and those that would display a part of me that even my partner doesn't need to know about. I think that's perfectly normal isn't it?
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
1 Jul 08
Well I hope it's perfectly normal, cuz that's me in a nutshell.
@kat_princess (1470)
• Philippines
2 Jul 08
Not really everything but I tell almost everything to him.He and my friends are the only one who understand what I'm going through.Well sometimes he misunderstands me but I do my best to make him understand my point.But one thing's sure.I'll love him always.
@chrislotz (8137)
• Canada
29 Aug 08
When I was with my husband I never told him everything. I needed some privacy and so it was my thoughts. I mean, if it was something important then I would tell him, but if it was something little I just never bothered him with it. Also if it had anything to do with a male I never said anything to him because he was a very jealous man and any little bit of attention another male gave me, he would blow it out of purpotion and take it way too far. So I just never said anything to him about it, I learned not to. I am no longer with my husband, left him 5 months ago, so I don't have that problem anymore, thank goodness, not that a lot of men pay any attention to me, but that even if it is a stranger that talked to me, he would flip out. Now I can talk to anyone I want.
@sharra1 (6340)
• Australia
2 Jul 08
Yes I do. I may not always tell him straight away but I do tell him everything. It is my nature to discuss what I think and feel and he likes me to tell him. I am glad that he does like it. I would never be happy in a relationship with someone I could not communicate with.
Everyone has private thoughts and I do not share every thought I have every day but if someone keeps cropping up in my thoughts I would talk to him about it.
My parents had a relationship of not talking to each other much at all and often when they did they just argued but they never really communicated or shared thoughts and feelings. For me sharing thoughts and feelings is important. I cannot bottle them up. I feel lucky to have a man who is happy to listen to them and share them with me.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
1 Jul 08
katsmeow no I think we all keep some of those private thoughts private, I always shared most everything with my husband, but some I kept to myself. none were bad, or outlandish, just my'
own private thoughts. those are things you would not care
to share with anybody, they sort of make you who you are in
a way.And who I am is a person who respects others and expects
to be respected the same way.
@Bluepatch (2476)
• Trinidad And Tobago
1 Jul 08
Everybody has their own private thoughts. Your husband has them too.
Basically, you shouldn't hide anything from your husband that he should know. What you tell him of your own private thoughts depends on the level of relationship that you have.
If you want a really deep relationship then you can go deeper into what you think with him. If not, then don't.
It depends on you.
There's nothing wrong with private thoughts.
@cinderella2007 (2662)
•
1 Jul 08
No i dont share everything!! Some things we need to keep secret or it feels like theres no point in telling them about this, that and the other.
It is good to have some secrets about us, it keeps us a mystery. as long as its not a bad secret, then why do they need to know!?
@BINETTIRAFFAELE (68)
• Italy
1 Jul 08
THE DIALOGUE BETWEEN PARTNERS HONEST IS FUNDAMENTAL FOR HAPPY LIVING! IF THERE ARE BIG PROBLEMS TO resolve is BETTER NOW, BEFORE OR BOTH THEN REPRESENTING BACK AND THEN IT MAY BE TOO LATE!
MANY REPORTS MAY BE IMPROVED CERTAINLY NOT WITH THE SILENCE.
HELLO!SINCERO
HALLO!
@deepyasu (8)
• India
1 Jul 08
i think there is no harm in telling the truths to each other. this is the relation which depends on trust and only trust.if u have trust and faith in each other there is no harm in telling the truths to each other. we keeps on telling all the thoughts and feeling to each other.
@academic2 (7000)
• Uganda
1 Jul 08
No, there are certain things that had better be kept away from your partner, lest you spoil your day, take this case scenario, you are in your office, a young lady/man storms in there and comes right to your mouth and planted a deep kiss, without your invitation-you didnt push her/him away, you seem to have liked it a bit moreover, yet knowing it was bad-will you go into your living room and start telling /him/her how you got kissed? Certain stories are better off untold!
@SHAMRACK (8576)
• India
1 Jul 08
Dear friend,
I had not said everything as some of things are my frieds told to me only becasue they trust me that much and they do want it to publicised and they told to keep it as a secrets and there are some things that could hurt our partner. May be the reaction could be more worse or may be the relationship could become more worser. Even though our marriage was not successfull. I never used to say eveything to the women whom I married nor she did not say everything.
@sk66rc (4250)
• United States
1 Jul 08
Personally, I do tell everything to my girl friend no matter how private the thoughts & feelings are... Sometimes she gets mad at me but on the other hand, she know I'm not hiding anything from her & she knows she can trust me absolutely with everything because of it because I'll be completely honest with her & tell her everything... She says she tells me everything & I see that she tries... That's all I can say about her because I'm not inside her head so I guess I don't truely know if she is or not... I hope she is...
@honeydew82174 (1720)
• United States
1 Jul 08
I Do not share everything. You have to have your own place sometimes just for you.Some of my thoughts are none of his bussiness. Some of my thoughts would hurt his feelings so I do not tell him. I think it is ok to have your own place inside of you for just you.
@Muelitz (1592)
• Canada
1 Jul 08
One ingredient of a good and lasting marriage or relationship is communication. You have to be open and honest with each other. On the other hand there are things that is better kept as secret because you know it will hurt your relationship with your partner. It is really your call whether to tell everything or not. I prefer telling all.:)