I had to do it!

My son had a friend who once stayed at my place after a week 'you did better than me' I asked him to leave. He was a little shocked to say the least, however he was not doing nothing to help himself and sleep all the time, A couple of years later I saw the boy again, ' oh I have to say it was a snowy day', he told me that was the best thing I ever did for him, he meet a man that was a Christian, and this man was able to do things I could not do, We I saw him, I was so proud, he had a job, clean cut, and back on track, I was guilty feeling for a long time, but I too had to do it, and at the end, God fixed it for him, I was so blessed to know he was on his journey, after such bad he had gone through. In the long run smallT, it is tough love, and I feel it is best for them.

Feel NO guilt but I understand why you would. You were there when he needed out of the rain sort of speak. I have been down that road myself. It was a hard decision to make but you did the right thing. Trust me!

Well its but natural to feel guilty about the situation. i think he overused your hospitality to him. What is maybe wrong was that you harshly done it. Maybe you could have made him aware that he is long overdue in his stay there and gave him a deadline when to leave. But anyway I think you just do what you think was necessary and the guilt feeling would be gone in time for sure.

You have nothing to feel guilty about because it looks like you were scammed. My kids have had friends like that, too, and the sad stories and empty promises never end until you end them. It's hard making the decision to stop letting someone take advantage of you and then acting on that decision but you weren't doing that boy any favors by letting him stay and stay. Maybe now he'll stand on his own two feet. At 20 years of age he should be.

You have nothing to feel guilty about. Some people will take advantage of you if you let them. I had a similar problem. However my guest who overstayed her welcome was my grown stepdaughter. She was to stay only until she could get on her feet after her divorce. Whenever the subject of her finding an apartment, she conveniently "lost" her job. Her father and I finally gave her a one-way ticket back to her mother.

There is nothing to be guilty. Though you were late, you did correct thing. You let him stay in your house for three long weeks and that it the maximum one can do. If you haven't asked him to leave now, he would have stayed for some more days and this might have resulted in his stay for many more days.

Don't feel guilty, people like that usually just move on and find someone else to tell a story to and mooch off of. Once a couple stopped at my house to use the phone and ended up staying for 4 days. They had one excuse after another until I finely told them they had to leave. They ended up living in a car in a field close by, for the summer. I felt like crap when they walked by every day, but I was a single mother and could hardly feed us let alone two more adults with no jobs and no intentions of getting jobs. I did invite them in for meals now and them. They eventually got on their feet and moved out of their car, something they might never have done if I continued to take care of them. Your guilt will pass..

You did the right thing.From your story, I'm wondering if he really DID have a brother who existed? There's something wrong with the scenario. What did your son say about his friend? Is he a good influence on your son? What you did should've taught him some responsibility in life. Nothing is free today. It's a dog eat dog world out there, he should learn to survive. Hmmm... I wish him well also.

I think you did nothing wrong. Actually you did the right thing. It might make him a little more ambitious. I have some relatives who still live at home. One doesn't even work not even to mow the grass. If their parents would have kicked them out they would probably be better people. Now its like they think they are owed something.

sometimes we need to do it though i will feel guilty as well never knowing what will happen to him once he left..but asking for 3 days only that turned into 3 weeks that is somehow abusive i think..

Poor kid probably doesnt have anywhere else to go, but what are you going to do? You're not his mommy and he wasnt paying rent I'm sure. My son is almost 20 and if he gets kicked out of his dad's place he may be in a similar situation. he went to grandma and grandpa's before.

I also wish he'd be fine. I think it's ok though. It was real nice of you to let him into your home. However, I don't mean he would but he may abuse it as such for staying longer than expected. I understand though that it does feel bad somehow to let him go but it's ok for me, I'd do that as well if it happens to me. Take care!

I don't care he was wearing my sneakers and using my washcloth and towel. Yuck!! I don't even use my toothbrush any more (got a new one) because I think he might've used that. I think he'll be fine and if not at least he won't be here. Thanks MA!

I could imagine how hard it was for you to do that but I think what you did was just right because we should actually teach others not to take advantage of the kindness of others. If he had said before that he would be staying for that long maybe you could have really allowed him to stay that long. Unfortunately he said only two days so I suppose that you feel that you were somewhat have been taken advantage by his friend. It's really very hard actually to drive away a person specially if that person is a friend or a friend of a friend but still it's just right that you to do it because it's your house and they must learn no t to take advantage of one's kindness.

Surely at that age they must realise that some communication is necessary so everyone knows what's going on. And young adults should also realise that they can't just sponge off people. You did the right thing because these situations get more complicated the longer they go on. You don't help these people when you help them....helping them means making them stand on their own two feet. It was kind of you to help him out.

i dont think u should be feeling guilty about kicking him to the curb. he deserved what he got. u know his actions have told u that he had alterior motives. he was just out to use who ever he could to get what he wanted. people that are out for self. u did the right thing. have a good day.

You did have to do it, don't feel guilty, why should you have the feelings when he didn't have respect. Chalk it up to a learning experience.

If it was only a 2 day stay then I suppose that he never offered to pay his way ??? I think that you should NOT feel guilty about his leaving as he should not have put you in this position, certainly without discussion.

I wish them get new home, but they could have asked permission to stay for some more time, they never thought for staying long time with you, as per your action it was not wrong step from you, after that you felt very emotional and thinking about them,means you still love them, god will help them, don't worry for that.

I'm sorry that this happened to you. I guess sometimes people just look for good hearted people to use, I know I've been through it many times before. I think you did a good thing, it's hard enough to support yourself and your family now days, let alone an extra person. Don't feel guilty, he should feel guilty for doing that to such a nice person! Take care!