A broken promise...

we have a saying that if there's a will there's a way... I know you didn't mean to break your promise but the way I see it... your promise to that old woman was not one of your priorities... it wasn't exactly an empty promise but you should've given more priority to it if you really meant saying it... specially considering that she was already of old age and anytime she'd be taken away... but I believe you realize that now... I don't mean to criticize you in any way... I believe you mean well for that old woman... but you happen to have a family of your own that you have to take care of... I know how you feel or felt about that old woman... I'm currently a nursing student and sometimes I also get the chance of being in such situations... I seem to get attached to my patients as I get to know them... but there is one thing I learned... I have to be realistic... when I care for my patients I really do care... I do everything I'm supposed to do because I want them to become better... but once they're already ok I should learn to let go... everything ends there... honestly it's hard specially if you've taken care of that person for a really long time but you should know your limitations... I remember my professor telling us before we even had our duties in hospitals that we should tell anything to the patient that is not realistic... we shouldn't give them false hopes... just like saying they will become better if we know that patient is terminally ill... because in the end it would be us that would be blamed and would be haunted by our conscience... But aside from such words said I guess another lesson here is to do everything now and not later... it reminds us how short life is that we should make the best of every moment... it's like saying I LOVE YOU to your loved ones now before it's too late... I hope my words made sense... by the way welcome back to mylot...

Hi Dhangski, I'm 44 and I am sure I have broken many good intentioned promises. I think it's part of life. I have also had many promises made to me that were broken. If I even remember them all, I think I have forgiven those people. I have also forgiven myself, which is what you should do. Treasure the memory of this woman. Don't forget her but do forgive yourself. We are only human.

Don't be too hard on yourself, by blaming yourself for breaking a promise you were unable to keep. To be able to devote a life to caregiving, and take care of the less privileged and those who are unable to take care of themselves, is already a very noble calling, one that demands self-sacrifice on the part of those who answer such a call. You can feel proud that you took up that challenge, because not many people have this self-sacrificing spirit. You had given your best to Lola and poured out your love to her in the short time you cared for her in the hospice. You had done more for her in this short period what many others had never done for her in their lifetime. I'm sure you had touched her deeply, and even though Lola had left for a better place, I'm quite sure in her heart she will remember your goodness and kindness. What you can do in keeping her memory within you, is to continue in the same tradition of giving your life and care to others like Lola whose life and spirits can be lifted by what you do a a caregiver. Continue to do what you do, and God will reward you for the blessings you pour out to others.

Lola Idad is surely very very happy wherever she is now. You might broken your promise with her, but the time you spent with her while she was alive, is already a treasure to her. Just pray for her... I was separated with my first wife when our son was still 4 years old. I told him that I will be back for him as I have to move back to Cebu for work. I promised him that the two of us will remain together and I will never have another woman in my life. I don't know what happened. And I came to meet another girl which is now my wife. But even I broke the promise of not having another woman, I came back for him, bring him back to Cebu. And we live again together, together with our new family.

I think she was a bit disappointed with you but if she knew what your reason for breaking what you had promised her I think she would understand it..you had reasons but that was not a selfish reason..circumstances did not agree with what you have planned..it was a good intention though it did not came through but i think she is still happy 'coz you have given her hope..she had clanged to your promise happily..she had happy days with you and that she will remember even in her after life i am sure of that..you have cared for her so much you had treated her as your own..you are not bad..circumstances were the hindrance..if not for that circumstances i know you will not break your promise..and if she will see you now i know she is happy for you..and she is very thankful for the memory you have left her..

Aww that is so sad. I almost cried when I read it. :( I am sure she understood your situation. May she rest in peace.

Sometimes we make promises that can not be kept no matter how hard we try. They are made with good intentions but like I said they can not be kept. I'm sure she knows you would of came if you could but hun you need to remember you had a life of your own and a family of your own to care for. Yes we can and do get attached to others but it is not our job to take in everyones family to care for. You never know her daughter may have put her in there and well yes you were there for two weeks but that doesn't mean the daughter didn't come before then or after. Older people when put in a home sometimes forget when a family member even comes around and loses track of time. See you promised her to visit her and your life got extremely busy and other things got in the way. Maybe her daughter lived far away and could only come ever so often or she had children and couldn't get someone to care for them so she could check in more often with her mother. But if I were you I wouldn't beat myself up over not going and well think of it this way, you gave the woman some needed love and companionship for a couple of weeks you were her bright spot.

i had broken once but not really a promise but a duty to pray a sister..shes a Benedictine sister..i had joined an organization when im still in high school its like a prayer or something or whatever..but i did pray for her for a few months on my joining..and i have even seen here in the church..but unluckily i forgot her name!! my gosh!!so that i cant forget to pray for her i choose a date where i will never forget her and that was every 10th of every month...and since i got married i was not able to pray for her..and its this discussion that i had remember it..regarding of the broken promise you had done..well i guess the best thing you can do to her is to pray for her soul...by doing this i guess it will feel you good ...

Well, you didn't break the promise because you wanted to. It was broken because of the circumstances of your life. Besides, the old lady is the responsibility of her own family, not yours. At that age, of course, you can pass away anytime and I'm pretty sure that if your circumstances had changed you would have gone over and kept your promise. So its not a blamable situation, you did your best, after all, you're just a trainee in the home. No blame to you at all.

In life most promises are made to be broken. For whatever reasons we have we should avoid making promises so as not to dissappoint people. For me, things are better be done when we have time or when we are capable to do it.

hi there..thanks for the best response appreciate it. hear from you soon. thanks again.

I think that, the old lady will frogive you because you did not came to visit her due to difficult circumstances. Luckily I have never came to such a position.