Would it be wrong of me to tell off family members?
By LordTimber
@LordTimber (287)
United States
July 2, 2008 2:04pm CST
Some people in my family are really pushing my buttons, and going out of their way to make me mad. And not just "messing around with me", either. They really are pushing my buttons. I think that they are trying to get me to snap, or yell. And I'm about ready to. But do you think I should? It's getting to the point that I'm starting to not care about them, as family. And I know that's not a good thing to say, but I don't deserve to be treated the way I am.
1 person likes this
6 responses
@fwidman (11514)
• United States
2 Jul 08
If they are pushing your buttons, let them know that you don't like what they are doing. You don't have to yell, just calmly tell them you don't like their attitude towards you. Then, if being diplomatic fails, then yell! But, don't keep yelling. Leave the scene and let them wonder about what they are doing :)
@LordTimber (287)
• United States
2 Jul 08
Being calm about things with my family, is like trying to force a needle through a metal plate. It just don't work. If I tell them I do not like what they are doing, they give me the whole "I don't give damn" attitude. Hence why i was considering yelling. But if I yell and walk away, they follow me wherever I go. It's like having angry stalkers. Lol. but seriously, they need to stop being rude and mean. I never did anything to them, I shouldn't have to put up with this.
@LordTimber (287)
• United States
2 Jul 08
I agree. They aren't nice. Sometimes I wonder if I've been adopted, because I don't act like any of them.
@jimbomuso (950)
•
3 Jul 08
hi LordTimber!
there's a saying 'you can choose your friends but not your family'. If there really pushing for a fight ..give em one .. but not the way they expect it. Take your stuff and go to a friends house (If you can or consider moving out altogether). you've not explained what started the situation and I'm not asking you.. but try a calm tactic like stating where exactly you stand and saying something along the lines of 'I cannot tolerate your company anymore, you are my family and I love you but everyday you are making my life miserable to the point where I dont want you anymore.' and dont worry how you feel , its only natural to have disagreements. take care
1 person likes this
@jimbomuso (950)
•
4 Jul 08
Hi again!
just a cautionary thought.. don't put yourself in a situation that could be harmful to you.. make sure you stay with a dependable and stable friend. dont say to yourself 'anything is better than this' because quite often things can turn sour. I hope you find the peace of mind your looking for, and good luck with your independence.
1 person likes this
@LordTimber (287)
• United States
3 Jul 08
Thank you! I might do exactly that! I love them because they are family, but living with them really is miserable. You took the words right out of my mouth. I will be taking my things, and I will be finding a new place to live. I will not yell, but show them that they have gone too far, by leaving them behind and moving on with my life.
@irishidid (8687)
• United States
2 Jul 08
Are they trying to get a reaction out of you? Sometimes the best way to handle these sort of situations is to do nothing. Don't let the things they say or do get to you. Harder than it sounds, I know but better than being like them.
1 person likes this
@LordTimber (287)
• United States
2 Jul 08
Sometimes they do that, yeah. But I already give them the silent treatment, or the lack or response/action to their behavior, and it only makes them angrier. And the more mad they get, the more they treat me badly. They just want to vent their anger on me, when they're mad at someone else. because I'm the pushover in the family, and they know that I don't fight back when they start crap. So guess who gets crapped on? Me. And far more than I normal, too.
@scorpiobites (298)
•
4 Jul 08
You mean they push you to work?Then get out and get to work ,then maybe they will be happy with you. Find out what makes them do what they are acting..
1 person likes this
@scaflone8 (190)
• Philippines
16 Jul 08
Try speaking out to them and discuss this situation in a manner wherein everyone is calm and in a correct mind set. It's ok to set your boundaries. Learn to voice out how you feel but i don't mean it by yelling or shouting but in a good manner and make them understand what and how it makes you feel. As a family they should understand.
