learning another language, as seen on tv, the rosetta stone, eye-q, speed-read

oh, believe you and me, when i first found out,or should i say "figured it out", i was fuming inside, but i knew that would get me no where...i had to find a healthier way to channel that energy than into fury and feeling sorry for myself or for wanting retribution...i had to pray on it, had too, and ask for guidance on a different point of view and perspective that brought me back to love and peace as best as possible, and yet realistically, so as to not be lying to myself an thusly entering into denial...kinda tricky...takes some soul-searching and admitting to things that you might not necessarily like to admit that you possess as feelings ( and or in my case - visualize ) towards another, but i'm LEARNING -too- that in accordance with the laws of the universe, espically pertaining to "the law of attraction" that if you believe and give more than you expect to receive, the universe will bring to you more than you ever could imagine...or something like that...a saying referring to love initially,...but i think it also applies to receiving the keys and tools for success and abundance ( in all aspects of life) the hardest part of this is "following through" with the right intention that brings about the blessings. So for my sister, yes, i was ANGRY, and that's okay, that's a normal initial human reaction, i acknowledged it, i accepted it, i didn't have to like it, i welcomed it , felt it, prayed on it and delt with it, as best i could, can for now, most of it is gone, i still have some residual disappointment or something yet, i can feel it...not quite sure how to phrase it...but whatever it is i will take it to the universe and express it and ask for the strength to neutalize change it into something positive, change my focus and attention, so now i try my best to focus on the fact that although she is human and made a choice that hurt me a was selfish (again), i must remind myself that she isn't in the same place in her head or heart that i am in, she is focused on "the world" and "survival" and she is thinking that she must do these kinds of things because otherwise if she doesn't "take it for herself" no one is going to give it to her...so she is CLAWING her way to the top...some would say..(plus i know that deep down inside she has some jealousy issues or something with me , this has been an ongoing thing, she loves to play people and she is thinking that this will undermine my self-esteem and shake up my confidence, lead me into mental and emotional confusion and thusly into an ugly state of mind and way of being and as a result if i'm negative then others won't like me, then we'll fight, she'll be able to point the finger at me and say "see...blah, blah, blah" taking the attention off of her and direct it towards someone else's bad- hoping they'll forget what started it all in the first place and what she had done. So when you try to defend yourself you come acrossed as judgemental, hypocritial, self-righteous, and just basically the a**hole.--does it show that i've been down that road a time or two, actually i went 3X, the third time just to be sure i wasn't just making things up in my mind...it sure was a trip to see and come to the conclusion.."uh, yep holly you really did see that correctly" ...and then the "WOW" hits you and you have to step back and reevaluate the situation. i don't want to live like that...i've been there and i didn't like it and it really wasn't me, who i really want to be...like begets like...so i'm rethinking how i want to invest my energies and direct my focus...so i'm going or coming out of a transition and working on building a firm and solid foundation in more alignment with the truth of what i'm discovering (the ever-changing) about who i am...and hopefully that is just what they call "gettin better with age" and although there's a battle going on between me and my sister, i'd rather win the war waged within myself and with this world, because then in the end i've really won both.

oh, by the way, uh, yeah let me know if you do get the rosetta stone, i'm not even sure how much it costs, the eye-q was four hundred with the advanced spanish, the confidant conversationalist, the listening to win, the speed-reading and i think there was one or two more things in there, supposedly oprah got it for the school she started in afica. i really hope some others chime in on this subject; i'm really curious if these work as efficiently as i hope they do, if there are other methods out there, maybe some less expensive(?)gfc=got fingers crossed...and if anyone out there is actually using them, how they are, come on people...imwtk= inquiring minds want to know...holly1129