how to bring a friend back up when he's feeling down?
By wisconsin26
@wisconsin26 (3859)
United States
July 7, 2008 5:18pm CST
Really how does one try and bring there friend back up when they are totally down... Here's the story..
Last week a friend of mine was let go from his job that he had for two years, not to mention it was a really good job he loved it.. He was told to clean out his office and he was being let go or laid off temp. he has two kids 20 and 16.. He's so down I wish there was something I could say or do to him to make him happy again.. I know losing working is a hard thing to deal with.. Anyone know anything I could say or do to bring him a smile again? Well ok he does smile but I think they are fake lol.. It's weird cause it brings me down to see him this way.. Not sure what to do.. Help please!!
2 people like this
7 responses
@Feona1962 (7526)
• United States
10 Jul 08
Just let him know that you are there if he needs to vent..That is pretty much all you can do...It is sad to hear that he has lost his job..
Everything happens for a reason and better things are yet to come for him...
@wisconsin26 (3859)
• United States
10 Jul 08
Hi Feona that's what I tell him.. Not much he can really do when the company being as small as it was just needed to get smaller i guess you can say.. However I wish it wasn't him being that he has two kids he needs to take care of and feed. but they do have jobs themselves which is a good thing so if all does fail they can help pitch in for certain things... Thanks for your reply..
@Feona1962 (7526)
• United States
10 Jul 08
Downsizing sucks..It is sad that is the reason..He will be able to find new work..
@checapricorn (16060)
• United States
8 Jul 08
Hi wisconsin,
This moment, he needs you to be just around even no words..We can't control the feeling specially if no notice prior, I mean it was just an abrupt laid off..He will do fine and when he is ready, for sure, he will be talking and smiling back. I am sure he can find another good job with his experience!
@wisconsin26 (3859)
• United States
8 Jul 08
hi chep and thank you for your reply, I am sure he will be again soon... I do talk to him alot on the phone.. I just don't like seeing him sad and upset like that.. He did have a great job and he just needs a boost in which he's already done.. He is already looking for new work.. He did call me today he was giggling so that makes me happy! Again thank you!!
@checapricorn (16060)
• United States
8 Jul 08
That's good to hear and for sure, you're one of the reasons why he was happy and with your sincere sympathy for sure he will recover from feeling down soon!
@lilaclady (28207)
• Australia
7 Jul 08
I think to just be there for him but not to force him to be happy, if you lose your job and for other reasons it is ok to be down for awhile but the main thing is that he knows he has a good friend who is not going to force him to be happy when he has nothing to be happy about...throw in a little humour to see if he wants to go that way but just be there.
@wisconsin26 (3859)
• United States
7 Jul 08
For sure yes, he knows no matter what happens even before he lost his job I was always going to be his friend... He did ask me after wards.. Do you think bad of me? Of course not I told him, things happen and it wasn't his fault they just couldn't afford to keep him there that's was all.. He did a great job doing what he did do and worked hard.. I told him that when he does get another job and the ex boss is contacted they will give you a good word unless for some reason they lie and don't want him to get one.. He knows no matter what though he has a true friend that will be there no matter what time of day it is just to talk.. Thanks for your reply!
@lucy02 (5015)
• United States
8 Jul 08
I think just calling and checking on him regularly will help.
He's naturally going to feel bad after losing his job but I think its important for him to know he still has his friends.
I know its got to be hard (with prices rising every minute) to be without a job right now.
@wisconsin26 (3859)
• United States
8 Jul 08
Oh I do that, He's a wonderful not to mention a great person.. No matter what and I did tell him this I'd be there for him, job or no job... A job doesn't make a person that's for sure.. he's very important to me.. Thanks for your reply!
@steve9737 (918)
• Colombia
7 Jul 08
it is really hard to find something that help to bring your friend back up when he is felling down because even when you would make him smile for some moment it will not fix the problem he has, maybe when he find a new job he will start to feel well again, but I am sure he will appreciate it if you just talk to him or invite him ot hang out, because he would be feeling alone and depressed, even maybe just chatting with him at msn would made he forget for a moment his problems, when I have been depressed and some friend come online and I start to chat with him it made me feel better, but you would try don't speak about his job or something that would made me remember his bad luck, I don't know what more would you do to help your friend back up.
@wisconsin26 (3859)
• United States
8 Jul 08
The hardest thing is that he's in PA and I am in WI so there is a distance between us.. I mean I'd take him out and let him have fun and forget his problems if I could.. Or just find something that will make him happy and forget his problems for a little bit.. I do try and do that on chat with him.. But seeing him like that is just sad.. Honest though I feel like I did something wrong he did ask me that today because even I couldn't smile cause I feel sometimes I over talk things or something but he tells me I didn't do any wrong.. He's working on a resume so he is looking for work, he must be going crazy with nothing to do all day but cleaning house LOL.. Poor guy that's all I have to say..And thank you so much for your reply it means alot!
@alialsaad (2)
• United States
17 Sep 10
Hey, I read the situation.... the thing is.... I am making an english paper about a similar situation....
and I think I have the solution to your problem....
What you can do for your friend is to make a mix tape for him.... which will help to make him feel better about him self and about the relationship between the two of you as close friends....
If you want the five stages and the songs that correspond to these stages .... you can give me your email and i can send it for you, i just don't want my homework to be on the internet.... good luck
@jallyjoe (12)
• Jamaica
10 Jul 08
well there nothing much you can do than just be there for him. encourage him to continue because it's not the end of his life. God has given him that job and i'm sure he will help him to get another, all he has to do is put this trust in God and look for a next work. make sure he doesn't feel like he is alone in the world. we have this saying in my country that says good friends better than pocket money, so be a good friend.
