Talk on your own time, not on mine??
By mommyboo
@mommyboo (13174)
United States
July 9, 2008 10:34pm CST
This is a vent. Based on a lot of threads I've seen about cell phones and usage even though I haven't experienced many headaches in real life, I would like to know why so many people have it in for regular cell phone users. I see so many comments from people who don't want others to have their ringers on, people who don't want to hear conversations from people in all manner of places, from the school when they pick up their kids to the gym, restaurants, the mall, grocery stores. There are people who maintain that cells 'should be' for emergencies only or that people shouldn't use them when driving or when jogging, etc. I don't hear this type of venom from anybody in face to face dealings at all.
All right, first of all, what gives you the right to dictate what is okay? That's right, nothing. You can have your preferences. However, did you ever stop to think maybe these things bother everybody, yet not everybody lets it bother them to the extent that they make comments like this? As much as I don't really want to hear some chick argue with her ex-husband about which weekend he's taking the kids, sometimes that might be what I hear. It's her conversation, it's her phone, it's her right to talk on it. Big deal. I'm not going to go knock the phone out of her hand or screech and complain that she shouldn't be allowed to talk on her phone.
I think this would be a good topic to apply 'live and let live' to. You do what you feel is appropriate for YOU and let others determine what is appropriate for them. They may and probably will NOT be the same. Live with it. I get really hot under the collar when people who are legally my EQUAL (i'm talking about the average joe) go around trying to control or indicate what is okay for me to do. I do not do this to others. I won't accept it happening to me.
4 people like this
10 responses
@soooobored (1184)
• United States
11 Jul 08
I'm pretty much "to each his own" on the cell phone matter... EXCEPT!
Has anyone ever been out on a date with a guy (not a boyfriend, someone you're just starting to see), and the guy takes his phone out and starts talking during a quiet dinner for two??
THAT is grounds for up and walking out! Text messaging during a meal is rude, but something I can get over, but having conversations about the party last weekend, or yeah I was so drunk, on a DATE?!?
Total pet peeve of mine!
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
12 Jul 08
Ok ok, on a date it's time to not answer calls - but more or less because you are the center of the guy's attention so he has no attention left for the phone =) Obviously on a BAD date, the new thing to do is have a rescue ring so that you can make up an excuse for having to leave early. I've actually had my kids call me before to get me out of something earlier without having to make anybody feel bad. I don't want to make people feel bad but sometimes that's the only way to make a quick appearance and leave.
@SViswan (12051)
• India
10 Jul 08
Though I agree with the 'live and let live' part, sometimes I feel that people with cell phones do not realize that part of it.
I'm not saying people shouldn't have a conversation anytime they want....but try to keep the volume down so that no one around is disturbed. I particularly do not like people who talk on the phone when they are driving. They are not only risking their lives...they are also risking the lives of innocent others.
It's just the same as people smoking in public places. They are free to smoke when they want....but please don't blow it into my face.
At my workplace....I find my colleagues on the phone most of the time and hardly any work gets done. And I end up doing most of the work because they are 'busy' with their phonecalls.
It's not the fact that they are talking on the cell that bugs me....it's when it affects me that I get bugged.
But I don't rant about it all the time to everyone.
1 person likes this
@SViswan (12051)
• India
12 Jul 08
I work at a school...and we stay back for around 2 hours after the kids leave so that we can organize and plan for the next day. I have an assistant who is either feeding her daughter or talking on the phone the two hours and I end up doing all the work. Fortunately, the teacher of the other class (who I have to co-ordinate lesson plans with) talks on the phone rarely and even if she does and I need to plan something, she tells the person she will talk to them later. That makes sense. She's accessible in case there's an emergency but she also gets work done...which is not the case with everyone who has a cell phone.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
10 Jul 08
I agree with you for the most part. I overhear conversations all the time, whenever i am out and about in the public whether they be live conversations or someone on their cell. I don't have a problem tuning them out and I also don't see what the big deal is. While driving...it is a distraction. I work in a store and it is downright rude when a person comes to the counter,gabbing on their cell. they are not paying attention. they'll put their money on the counter and I'll ring up their stuff only for them to realize they wanted cigs. Then it is a matter of gaining their attention again to find out what brand. It is worse if they have a credit card that has to be rung twice simply because they were not paying attention. It holds up the line etc. It happens all too often. Time and place for everything.
1 person likes this
@DonnaLawson (4032)
• United States
10 Jul 08
I disagree with you on parts of your topic.. We have almost been run over, and would have been if not for my husband being very careful, many times by people talking on their cell phones while driving.. I don't believe that you can safely drive and talk on a cell phone.. People drive like maniacs nowadays, whether on a cell or not, and it takes all of your attention to make sure that you get safely to your destination.. I also like to have a quiet meal and really do not like to hear someone having an argument or a huge fight with someone on the phone.. I also think that cell phones should be taboo in certain places, such as church. I do believe in everyone having the right to talk on their phones but have manners, do not take the chance on killing someone, do not air your dirty laundry in public and don't disrupt church services with your cell phone.. I have heard many cell phones ringing, enough to not pay any attention to them, and we do use ours quite a bit, but it is just a matter of having good manners when using your phone, then it should be no one elses business but yours.. I am not sure what you have heard about using your cell phone, you do have the right to use your phone, but no one has the right to abuse it and step over into someone elses space.. A lot of situations can be avoided by just using good manners and good common sense.. I have never been bothered by anyone using their cell phones unless, as I said in the beginning, I am almost being run over by someone who is on their phone and running a stop sign or a red light because their attention is on other matters.. Cell phones can be a life saver but need to be used responsibly.. Have a great evening and keep on ranting, it keeps you from going crazy.. 
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
11 Jul 08
Here is my take on the driving issue - I agree that some people maybe shouldn't be talking if they can't do two things at once. However, if you have handsfree, it's no different (in my opinion) than talking to a passenger or two and having your stereo blaring at the same time, or trying to settle fights between children in the backseat who are punching each other because 'HE touched me MOM!' while you are driving. Only, if I'm having a conversation with a friend while I'm driving, I don't have to turn to look at anybody or pry anything away from another person or hand out snacks etc. This is just my view, of course - and in an emergency when I have been upset about something, I have pulled into a parking lot and stopped my car in order to talk. I tend to use the cell to get directions, and I do a lot better having someone talking to me, telling me where to go as I am going. I don't have a gps in my car and I don't know when - if ever - I'm going to purchase one, so this is another reason I rely on using the phone in the car. I have never hit anything or run over or into anything as a result of being on my phone, not even a trash can or a runaway cart. I have actually had MORE trouble when I am not on my phone, as in someone walking right in front of me in a parking lot without looking and then getting mad at ME for being there even though I stopped, having them scream and cuss at me as if it's their right to just walk in front of cars willy nilly. Sometimes I think people should not be on phones walking around in parking lots because it's like they don't SEE the cars driving around!
I suppose my point is that people should learn and know their own personal limits and then stick to them. Everybody's are different.
1 person likes this
@fluffnflowers (1594)
• United States
10 Jul 08
I do think people should be courteous, but it's not my responsibility to instruct others in that sort of behaviour. I use my cellular phone as my primary phone (I don't have a landline), so it's not a just for emergency thing. I don't talk on it in restaurants, rarely in stores, and never in places like movie theaters or libraries.
My father LOVES to talk on his phone in restaurants and I always ask him to hang up or go outside to talk. I can, though -- he's my dad and someone I can nag! 
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
12 Jul 08
I've never had someone ask me to hang up or go outside. I have on occasion chosen myself to go outside or away from people because *I* do not want other people hearing the conversation. When this isn't the case, I don't feel I should have to go away, know what I mean? I have never, and I mean never, asked another person to get off their phone or go outside, as I feel this is ruder behavior. I guess it depends what your priorities are and how good you are at filtering things out.
I have apologized to friends before if I'm on the phone while visiting, but for the most part we have all done it interchangeably to each other and it's never been a big deal. To me it's simply a fact of life now.
@mescue (64)
• United States
12 Jul 08
So I agree with the typical; not in movies, not in church, not while driving (although I am guilty of this one from time to time). I love my cell. I would be lost without it. I also have email on it so it's very convenient. My husband has a work cell and a personal cell so I can always reach him! When I leave home, I have all my calls forwarded to my cell so I am always reachable. I had one bad experience standing in the return line at Walmart. The guy behind us was talking on his cell and his language was very nasty. I had my daughter with me so I did get extremely irritated. I ended up asking him to please watch his language. I guess that's not really connected to him using his cell. If he had been speaking to someone standing next to him and was using that language, I would have reacted the same.
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
12 Jul 08
I try to make sure my language is appropriate for the company I'm keeping. If something escalates then I try to be alone. It's hard when you have a kid arguing with you on the other end though. I have email on mine too but I don't use it very often. I do send photos to my home email so I can store them on my computer.
@luvstochat (6907)
• United States
10 Jul 08
There are some places that a cell phone would not be appriotiate church, court, school, but if someone wants to let their entire life be heard while they are talking on a cell phone while walking down the mall they are not hurting anyone. I guess I don't mind when somone is talking on one like that. But please people pay attention if you are talking on one while you are driving.
@moonlitmagikchild (22181)
• United States
10 Jul 08
the only time i think it should matter is if its at a meeting or a movie.. but other than that who cares?? people just want to be irritated at something and well it seems like they have thrown every argument in the book against cell phones and it hasnt worked yet so they should just stop already!!
1 person likes this
@pheonixstar1982 (2307)
• United States
10 Jul 08
I totally agree with you on this. Just thought i would let you know.
1 person likes this
@mommyboo (13174)
• United States
11 Jul 08
Much appreciated! Based on the complainers who were clogging up the 'cell phone' category of discussions, I was starting to feel like I was being crucified for enjoying my phone! What is the point of having something that you don't use? I try to purchase things that are going to make my life easier, more enjoyable, etc, and I want to make sure they are worth the value - if you buy something that costs $300 but you use it every day, well then that's less than a dollar a day. If you buy something that costs $300 but you rarely use it, which was the better value? Right, the thing you use every day! I try to apply this to things I purchase whenever possible.
@latriciajones (846)
• United States
11 Jul 08
i agree with you a person should be able to talk about what they want to, because it is there cellphone and their the ones that pay the bill every month. but then again at the same time sometimes depending on where you are you should take it in to consideration and know that people may not want to hear what you are talking about. and i know that i wouldnt even want anyone to be in my business so if i get a call and i know it is gonna be one of those calls then i ask the caller to let me call them back.
