The power of silence

@kiwibee (240)
New Zealand
July 11, 2008 9:22pm CST
I need input from fellow MyLotters! Please respond with your own experience... I have found over the years that if I get a good idea, then I really need to keep silent about it, because if I discuss it with friends/family, the power of the intention is diluted and it just fizzles out. Example... years ago, I had elderly neighbors. I hadn't had much to do with them, but when I heard they were moving I thought it would be a kind gesture on my part to take my longhandled squeegee over to them and clean their outside windows for them. Well, I told my kids I'd had that idea, and the upshot was, I ended up not doing it at all. I was a bit disgusted with myself. Later, with a diet, for example... I would go well for a few days, then I'd tell my daughter, or one of my friends, what I was doing. With days or even hours, I would have broken my diet... Just recently, I noticed my coffee tasted a bit too sweet. I hadn't put much sugar in it, so next time I decided I'd use no sugar. I quite happily drank my coffee sans sugar for about a week, then when I was making coffees for me and my grandson, I casually mentioned it to him, what I'd done. Well Hello!! The next time I made coffee, I found myself reaching for the sweetener again!! And using it! Right... I have to get to the bottom of this. Is it just me, or have you noticed this sort of effect too? Is this a personal foible of mine, or is it a general human "rule", that talking about something dilutes the thought, and tends to reverse any good intentions? I am keen to see what responses I get here. I don't start many discussions, but I thought this to be the perfect forum for this question!
1 person likes this
2 responses
Ruth Belena
@paid2write (5201)
•
12 Jul 08
I think talking about something can have a positive effect, like the way you ended up helping the old couple next door. If you had said nothing about your idea, they would still have dirty windows! On the other hand you broke your diet and sweetened your coffee, which was not such a good thing, but maybe you feel more shame because you had spoken about it. If you had said nothing no-one else would know if you failed. I think once I have told someone my idea or plan I have to keep to it, so it's a way of making sure I do something I have been thinking about for a long time. Otherwise I could go on thinking about it and never actually doing it.
1 person likes this
kiwibee
@kiwibee (240)
• New Zealand
12 Jul 08
I think you read my post a bit too hastily. I was explaining that I had the IDEA of helping the old couple, but spoke to my kids about it and ended up *not* doing it. And I didn't feel shame for putting sugar in my coffee (actually it was Splenda, and the whole thing was unrelated to "diet", it was more to do with not wanting the taste of sweetness until I talked about it, when I went back to wanting it. But thanks for your poast. Your last few sentences are telling... they show me that for you, and presumably other people, the "silence to keep powerful" effect does not hold true ... that you actually feel *more* inclined to follow through if you DO discuss it! Anyone else?? Thanks!
2 people like this
Ruth Belena
@paid2write (5201)
•
12 Jul 08
You are right I did misread the first paragraph as you doing it but I did know what you meant about the diet and that you were drinking unsweetened coffee but saying it made you want to go back to using sweetener. For you there may be more power in silence, if speaking about things means they don't get done.
1 person likes this
Marja
@buenavida (9984)
• Sweden
11 Sep 10
Hi, kiwibee An interesting thought, maybe we should keep at least some goals to ourselves maybe some important ones... Have to test this. But as God knows what we think, we can at least talk to Him about our plans. He may also help us to fulfill what we have thought to do if it is according to his will. Interesting discussion..