Anger Management 101 HAHAHAHAHA
By mygirls9901
@mygirls9901 (338)
United States
July 13, 2008 6:09pm CST
Check this out!!! Don't you wish we could all think like this guy did??? It would probably help some of us out on an everyday basis:D
Here's how he did it:
When you occasionally have bad day and you and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know -- take it out on someone you don't know.
I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I had forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it.
A man answered saying, "Hello."I politely asked, "Could I speak with Robin Carter?"Suddenly, the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude. I realized I had called the wrong number. I tracked down Robin's correct number and got a hold of her. I accidentally transposed the last two digits of her phone number. After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.
When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled, "You're an a**hole!" and hung up.
I wrote his number down with the word 'a**hole' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer.
Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an a**hole!" It always cheered me up.
When Caller ID came to our area, I thought my therapeutic 'a**hole' calling would have stopped. So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John Smith from the telephone company. I am just calling to see if you are familiar with the Caller ID program?"He yelled, "NO!" and slammed the phone down.
I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an a**hole!"One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I had been waiting for that spot. The idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his car window. So, I wrote down his number.
A couple of days later, right after calling the first a**hole (I had his number on speed dial), I thought I had better call the BMW a**hole, too.
I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?""Yes, it is.""Can you tell me where I can see it?""Yes. I live at 1802 West 34th Street. It's a yellow house, and the car is parked right out front.""What's your name?" I asked.
"My name is Don Hansen," he said.
"When's a good time to catch you, Don?""I'm home every evening after five.""Listen, Don, can I tell you something?""Yes?""Don, you're an a**hole."Then I hung up and added his number to my speed dial, too. Now, when I had a problem, I had two a**holes to call.
But after several months of calling them, it wasn't as enjoyable as it used to be. So I came up with an idea. I called a**hole #1.
"Hello.""You're an a**hole!" (But I didn't hang up.)
"Are you still there?" he asked.
"Yeah," I said.
"Stop calling me," he screamed.
"Make me," I said.
"Who are you?" he asked.
"My name is Don Hansen.""Yeah? Where do you live?""A**hole. I live at 1802 West 34th Street, a yellow house, with my black Beamer parked in front."He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying your prayers."I said, "Yeah, like I'm real scared, a**hole."Then I called A**hole #2.
"Hello?" he said.
"Hello, a**hole," I said.
He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are...""You'll what?" I said.
"I'll kick your a**," he exclaimed.
I answered, "Well, a**hole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now."Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying I lived at 1802 West 34th Street, and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover.
Then I called Channel 13 News about the gang war going down on West 34th Street.
I quickly got into my car and headed over to 34th Street.
When I got there, I saw two a**holes beating the cr@p out of each other in front of six squad cars, a police helicopter, and the Channel 13 News crew.
NOW, I feel better - This is "Anger Management" at it's best.
1 response
@momalisa65 (1971)
• United States
14 Jul 08
Oh my gosh!!!! I am laughing my head off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am so glad my boys aren't home or they would have run over here to see what I was laughing at!
That is Waaaaaaay too funny!!!!!
I only did something similar once but it wasn't near as funny as yours.
There was a guy who came into the restaurant I worked at, and he was a real jerk who thought he was great because he was good looking. I couldn't stand his attitude. When he left a tip for his waitress, he put his phone number on the dollar bill...assuming that she wanted to call him! I thought he had some nerve.
Well, she didn't want to call him, and she brought all her ones to the cash register that evening to change them in for bigger bills. I was the cashier that night and the dollar bill went into my drawer. I copied down the phone number and decided that in the middle of the night when my baby woke up to be fed, I'd dial the number and hang up. I did this every night for a week. Several times each night.
One night a girl answered the phone and told me to stop calling. I told her to tell her boyfriend not to be putting his phone number on dollar bills and leaving them for the waitress!
@mygirls9901 (338)
• United States
14 Jul 08
Lisa, nicely done!!! I don't think I could ever think that quickly on my feet. Good for you!!! I think if a guy has a girlfriend he shouldn't be leaving his number on dollar bills EVER!!! I am glad I put a smile on your face. Thanks so much for the reponse :D