Affairs
By rhodges691
@rhodges691 (11)
United States
August 6, 2008 6:56am CST
What do you do when your sister has an affair and you know about it? I, knew but did not tell and now her husband and daughter that I have loved for so many years resent me. They do not understand that my sister is not only my sister but my best friend and is my hero. My sister raised me and I consider her to be like my mom too.
Not that I agree with what she did but I could only be there to listen and let her know that if she was not happy in her current situation that she needed to move on and not drag anyone with her.
Now the guy that she was cheating with is passed away and she is grieving for him,plus going through the pocess of letting her family know that there was someone else for a little over a year.
I, want to reach out to her and the rest but I feel as if I am being put in the middle and do not know what to say or do. I love them all and feel like the only stable people that I have known in my life are falling to pieces and I can not fix them.
It is a sad story.. But would you tell your in-laws??
5 responses
@dragonfly242 (1060)
• Bahamas
6 Aug 08
Hi!
NO i would not have told.
You were in a tough position, you love your sister and want to be loyal to her, but you also love your in-law and your niece.
You did the right thing by staying out of it,and allowing them to work through this themselves.
I can see where you would feel: showing compassion for either side can be construed as picking sides.
Just try and be there for all concerned, without openly favoring anyone.
I hope that things work out for the best, for all of you.
@rhodges691 (11)
• United States
6 Aug 08
Thank you and there is so much to give to this but I appreciate all that you both have said.
@hailie17 (448)
•
6 Aug 08
No i wouldn't have told my Brother In Law. Like you, my sister is one of my best friends and even if you love your extended family and do not agree with what she did I still think you did the right thing by not saying anything. You could have spilled the secret, your Brother-In-Law may not have believed you and then you could have lost all of their trust and love.
I think that once the hurt and angers goes away they will see that you were trying not to get involved and you had to show some loyalty to your sister.
@patms1 (521)
• United States
7 Aug 08
At one time I would have agreed with you about not telling. What I would have done is talk to her and tell her if I know its not going to be long before some one else finds out. When I told my daughter this she blew a fit at me. When I explained that I would have a hard time hurting her like that her response was would I rather see her with some awful STD? In today's world its not only hart that could be hurt but her health. I am sorry you brother in law and niece are angry but I can see their point. You do not say what he passed away from. Maybe she should let ever one know what it was and this may lessen their angry. If it was something that could be passed on then you are wrong and there is no way you can change that.
