Are we giving enough attention to good PARENTING these days...?

There are a lot of good parents out there who leave their children with babysitters and daycares. There are some really bad parents out there who stay home with their children. I guess what I'm trying to say is that the task of parenting is difficult and there is no perfect way to do it. I am fortunate enough to have a husband with a really good job that allows me to stay home with my kids, but I don;t take it for granted. They are my priority - not mylot, not housework (although that does have to get done). I can understand people needing to work. I don't think that they do it in the name of greed, but of basic necessity. If you want your children to have a good education there has to be money.

Parents are absconding their parent duty for the sake of money. They think they are producing money only to lose the love of their children.

When I started to respond to this discussion I had a different view on how I was going to respond. Then I read my response and reread your question and thought I didn't respond right so here is my second try. You ask why should both spouses have to work: Money - most people can't afford to live on one paycheck. There are more 'blue coller' people then 'white coller' out there meaning most people have to work HARD for what they make and still don't make near enough. Think about it who should get paid more the guy who picks up your garbage or the guy who sits at the desk and sends the garbage truck out? Guess who gets paid more - the guy sitting at the desk! If you are a family of 3 including husband, wife, child and one person works making $15.00 a hour working 40 hours a week that comes out to $2400.00 a month. Now minus JUST taxes - not health insurance or any 401K - NOTHING extra you get to take home about $1975 a month. How do 3 people live on that? They don't inless they have roommates or live with parents, have little to no car payment and use coupons for every thing they buy, they never go out to dinner, or buy any thing extra. And WHO wants to live like that??? In my opinion you can have both parents working and still give your child more then basic parenting! People that give there child basic parenting don't do it because they work they do it because children have become an inconvenious. Take my husband and I for example we both work FULL time. We changed our schedules around and I work days him evenings. Our daughter is with him, myself or grandma at all times. No day care no basic parenting - she has every thing not speaking of material things because althoght the child has that too she has it because she has 5 grandparents! My daughter has love and time and affection on a daily basis. She is given guidance and taught right from wrong - she knows that when some one says no we mean NO. Being a working parent doesn't make you a bad parent. Not taking the time to spend with your child makes you a bad parent. Not teaching your child right from wrong and guiding them through life makes you a bad parent.

I have always felt like the best caregiver for children are their parents. Unfortunately, with the economy the way it is, both parents usually need to work. People are not willing to make sacrifices anymore. My children are grown now, but I quit a really good job to stay at home with my children. I moved into a lower cost house, drove used cars, cooked almost all meals at home, and purchased some of my clothes from a thrift store. We made it just fine. Parents teach their children things they will not learn in a daycare. They also give them the love and security they will not get being away from their parents all day, every day. I believe that if people have the children it is their responsibility to ensure the child has everything a child needs, most importantly, love and attention and discipline. In todays fast paced world, it is much too easy to send the children off to daycares and sitters. Face it, daycares are in it for the money, not for the benefit of the child. Sure, some are better than others when it comes to programs and educational, but how many will cuddle your child just because he/she is feeling sad or lonely? Society is already showing signs of the millions of children that were raised in daycares. Children that were not taught respect, confidence, consideration, etc. which are things that seed crimes of all kinds. There were problems before, but they are continuously getting worse. Sorry this is so long, I could go on for hours on the subject. Thanks for letting me vent.....

In many families, it is necessary for both parents to work in order to make ends meet. I don't think both parents working outside the home is what determines good or bad parenting. Some parents who work are great and make time to spend with their children and do a great job. Some parents who are able to stay home with their children don't spend much time with them or teach them right from wrong. I do believe that parents these days don't teach their children the values parents of the past did, and they don't have to work as hard, and poor behavior seems to be more acceptable these days. but I don't think it is a result of both parents working, necessarily. If they have plenty of money and both parents work because they prefer it and the child spends more time in daycare or with a sitter than with their parents, even when that is not necessary, then they may be teaching their children to value money and things more than they value their family.

With the economy stressing so many families out and their efforts to put food on the table and work the hours at work needed to poay bills, etc..I don't think it is easy to paretn well. Still, the kids have to coe first and time has to be made to parent the kids, set firm, yet fair boundries for behaviour and..even to "play" a bit with them, so they know we love them. No one said to woudl be easy? But no..I do not think parents are doing the job well these days. But it is time to step up and make the time to "parent" kids and mentor/guide them to behave well and have good values, so they can grow to have stable and secure adulthoods.