Chewy is so weird.

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My pug Chewy is so weird. He does not like to be held or cuddled. He would rather play than get petted. I would really like it if he would just come up and wanted to be petted, or come up in my lap and lay down and let me pet him. He will come up as long as it is beside you and you can pet him like that but then he gets to where he wants to play. I think it is because of the way my husband has always just played with him most of the time ruffely. I kept telling him when he was smaller that I would like it if he would teach him to be more calmer or not to be so ruff. But he is hard headed and wont listen to me. How can I get Chewy to calm down and be more loving? He is 4 1/2 years old now and I have had him since he was 6 weeks old.