I'M BEING CHASED BY GIANT LAMB CHOPS FROM JUPITER.

Fortunately there is a way that this can be stopped. What you need is a jar of 'mint sauce'. Lamb Chops cannot tolerate the thought of mint sauce. In fact one of the better rural pasttimes is to go round fields identifying baby lambs and waving a jar of this substance at them, as their cowardly mothers look on in awe! Give it a try, you'll feel better.

Perhaps the Flying Spaghetti Monster can help!

Hey Port:) I am asking the pirates and the noodle people now to stop those flying pork chops from abducting you! Those are Jupiter inhabitants who had to come to peek on earth after a part of their planet was crashed by some giant size meteors.. they may even be "planetarian refugees"!

wooooow...u must be crazy..lol..jkjkjk! good luck!