Do others come to you for advice?

Hello munchkin (nice name there), I think you are being honest about it and there's nothing bad about that. I have been acting as 'uncle agony' before, so I know how you feel, LOL. When times like this occurred, usually I just go with the flow, I give the best that I can and when I just couldn't take it anymore, I just tell my friend that is in need of an advice that that's the best I could give her/him and I am having some sets of problems right now, so I hope they can understand and give me some space. Normally, that rarely happens, but when it does, my friends normally understand. Perhaps you can try to be honest about it to your friend, hopefully she's able to cope with that fact.

Dear MunchKin547, (WOAH THIS ISN'T A LETTER O_O) Well this happens to me alot, I've gotten depressed from it... But I'm starting to feel a bit better, normally I meditate... Or just let it all out in my pillow or tell someone. Even though I normally don't tell someone it helps. Some times when your feeling blue you need another person for advice.. We are all human and it happens Thank you, JP (ZOMG YOU NOOB)

Now that you mention it I wonder why they don't come to me. I think I give pretty good advice but hardly anyone comes to me for advice or comfort. Its probably the way you put yourself across. Or your personality. Check it out.

it's all in the way you begin to view it or think about it. I have people come to me all the time but it doesn't affect my days. If you are getting down, twist your thought around and remind yourself that you just helped someone with something they were uncapable of dealing with at the time. You changed what could have been a really bad day for someone into one that now has possibilities to be much better. Remember that the reason they come do you is because they trust you and you are a good person. You are caring, you value their friendship, you are a better person for it. Take what you can out of it for a learning experience, what happened that may have taught you something new and how can you use that to help better your life, maybe a lesson learned that may not otherwise have been?

Hay Munchkin I am new user in this website and this is the first discussion for me befor I ll post response to you could you tell me some informations about you to get know . I would appreciate an early answer

hi.. nice to meet you here.. i had experienced that my best friend come to me and need for a advice from me... some of them need my advice on their study... this happened it is because my friend is very stress on her studied and need some way or advice from me to reduce her stress.. some of them need my advice on their love... they need my advice maybe because they believe my and treat as their best friend also..I'm very happy my friend can share their problem with me and solve it together... thats is a real or true friend does... maybe i can give the best advice to them but i help them to analyze which thing can do and which thing cannot do..... have a nice day and happy my lotting!

some friends yes, they come to my house just ask for some advice about the relation, and i ever have story like all night long my friend called me just for to share about his girl friend and make me so bored and tired.

Yes, actually my friends, officemates and even old buddies would ask me for suggestions and advice about their problems. I love doing it though. I feel like I am a teacher or a preacher perhaps. I also seek advices from them somehow.

Yes, they do. Sometimes even with very private things, even if i dont know them very well! Either because im trustworthy or i look like i give good advice :P. But yeah, i guess, i am happy to do this when i can help. I guess you can approach the same people for advice too, or different people! I mean, they got to use your shoulder to cry on, you should be able to use theirs too ;). And sharing brings people together! It's less painful that way, being able to tell your friends something thats hurting you or making you feel sad. You can tell your close friends. Also if u don't feel like being an agony aunt, u can say something like 'Hey you know, ive actually been pretty sad myself', and then start talking about ur stuff and see how they react. i mean it should be a two-way thing, they shouldn't always have to just use u as their agony aunt, u need someone too!

yep,but not many,just a few. But sometimes I really need my friends' advice,you know,it's very useful to me.

Yes Munchkin i know exactly how you feel ever since primary school i have always had a mature head on my shoulders and have constantly been the one to listen and give advise. My boyfriend once commented that he was going to kidnap me one new years eve because he could never find me for the midnight kiss cos i'd be in a corner consoling and advising someone. Nothings changed lol even when i try to distance myself i still end up the agony aunt. I'm sorry you feel a bit down in the dumps babe! Whats bothering you work? home life? bit of everything? *gives big hug* anytime you need to talk just pm me at the moment i have so much time on my hands i really don't mind. When i'm down usually write in my journal as often it's an unusual times during the night i feel most fed up either that or i start a craft project or read a book to take my mind of it. I tend to then tell my friends afterwards when i feel a bit better and have given my head a bit of a wobble so to speak as it makes me feel more composed and sorted. Are you feeling any better today?

i think its a good thing that they come to you for advice. it shows u that they trust you. i have buddies come ask me for advie but with guys its a lot simpler since neither one of us like to talk its a one two word answer thing. girls like to talk on and on and on so i can understand why that would be frustrating for you. but still friends coming to you for advice show that they vlue your opinion...think of it that way

Well, you are a trusted friend and a good adviser. It is a blessing from God to have that kind of skill of listening to other peoples problems. So far, I have not yet experienced things like that, but if I would like you do I am also a human being who tends to also feels tired and sick of listening sometimes.

First of all you don't sound nasty at all. You have helped so many people with their issues and gave them advice. That does not make you a nasty person at all. It's hard to constantly help others and then when you need someone there might not always be that same helping hand. It's great to know that your opinion and advice is looked for and it makes you all warm inside to know that you are helping someone out. It can get frustrating because although you like helping others it soon starts to look like they don't even realize that you have problems of your own and that they seem to be running to you all the time while you try to figure your own stuff out. Sometimes I suggest going out for coffee. This way conversation is 2-way and it doesn't seem like a visit to a counselor. You both can talk about what is bothering you while still listening and providing feedback. You don't need to tell them to call someone else...rather give them the hint that they need to start listening too!

It's okay to tell people you need to take a break and only to call you if it gets really serious. It's not always okay to be an on call person. We need love too and I can totally relate to your situation. I am frequently the on call, the s-word is hitting the fan person. The trick is to have people who will return this favor when you need them to as opposed to people who only want you to take care of them.

Hi munch, [i]I play that role also with my friends...when I was in our Country and even up to this time, they always talk to me about their problems, cry to me and express their depression over the situations..There are times that I need to get away to give myself a break but, I know lending my ears will help them a lot! So, that is great that your friend trusted you and you make a difference in their lives..It might be so simple yet it means so much to them![/i]

i know exactly what you mean. It seems that i'm everyone's go-to-guy. So i'm constantly hearing their problems. Which i don't mind for i am a good listener and i usually don't truly give advice to them. i make them decide on their own with only a few minor pushes from me. i lead them to where they want to go in other words. Last year my best friend was going through some rough times financially and emotionally. Her fiance decided that it was over a few months before their wedding. i was there for her. Which again is fine by me. But there was a point that i myself was dealing with some issues that needed purging. When i would try to bring them up to her so she could hopefully return the favor, it never happened. i thought about bringing it to her attention for months. Then decided not too. Her perception of me was someone strong she could rely on during her weak points. i decided to let her continue seeing me in that light. i have my own ways of dealing with certain things.

ya all my friends come to me for advice, i've always been a person with more life skills learn and alot of advice to give out. the main reason my friends come to me is cuz i'm a very logical person, tht can give then may way to solve a problem and tell them wht might come of it. plus my friends seem to open up to me easly allowing me to advice them better.

my friends told me im a good listener. i dont know if i gave them good advise. hahaha but yes, they come and ask advise about their problem.

Hi,there and, yes, people sometimes come to me for advice and i dont mind but giving advice is a big responsibility and sometimes i wounder if im giving them the right advice because whats right for one my not be right for the other and like you say people dont think about the person giving the advice and they only think about there own feelings and don't realise that we might need some help and advice or we might just need a rest from all the different problems we hear every day so i totally understand from what i read you seem like a really caring person and theres nothing wrong with needing a little rest from things.