Babies: Help! the rules have all changed!

@madasp (563)
United States
August 27, 2008 5:57pm CST
Its been 15 years since I had my last baby and so much has changed as far as what the "experts" tell you is right. When I had my older kids I was told to get them on a schedule and keep them on it(for feeding,sleeping,bathing, etc). Now with this pregnancy everything I'm reading and hearing says not to. When my older kids were born it was mandatory that they sleep on their stomachs now thats a huge no-no. Put them on their backs. All the rules have changed and I feel like a first time mother again. So how did you/are you doing things with your babies and why?
4 people like this
10 responses
• United States
28 Aug 08
First of all, Congrats on the new baby! I have 2 children, a girl who is 2 years old and a boy who is 9 months old and with both kids I had them on a schedule. I mainly let them figure thier own schedule out first though, since I was up every 2 hours with a newborn, it wasn't until about 4 months old that they were on an actual routine. Both of my kids also hated sleeping on thier backs, but I kept them on thier backs till they had good control of thier heads and could push up a bit on thier arms (prob around 4 mos), before I placed them on thier bellies. I thought that it was safer. But, Once they were on thier bellies, they slept all night! I say use your motherly instinct. I think you'll be more relaxed with this one being your 2nd, I'm also sure your 15 year old would be a lot of help! :) goodluck.
2 people like this
@Sillychick (3275)
• United States
28 Aug 08
A schedule is nice for you, but not necessary for baby. What I did was keep track of when my son ate, slept and wet and soiled his diaper, and developed a (flexible) schedule based on that. I noticed that he seemed to get hungry about every 3 hours, so I was prepared to feed him in 3 hours, but waited if he was still sleeping or content playing, or rejected the bottle. I started a bedtime routine when he was about 3 months old, which seemed to help and now at almost 2 he does a great job of going to bed every night. I bathe him when he needs it, not on a schedule. When he was an infant it was no more than every other day. It has been shown to be safer to place infants on their backs to sleep, with no blankets until about 9 months when they are able to pull them off their face. Also no crib bumper or soft toys. I used Halo sleep sacks instead of blankets. Search for them or 'wearable blanket' to find them. I looked to books and other mothers for advice, but took all that information with a grain of salt. I ultimately did what felt right to me. I found a great pediatrician who is wonderful with him and answers all of my questions when I have doubts. My best piece of advice is to look around for someone you are comfortable with who doesn't rush you. That way you always have someone you trust to turn to. Congratulations! Relax and don't get too caught up in all the 'shoulds'-- believe me, you are going to hear plenty. It's enough to make you crazy if you let it.
2 people like this
@sedel1027 (17846)
• Cupertino, California
28 Aug 08
I never did follow all the rules. I put my son on a schedule because a) it makes life a heck of a lot easier and 2) kids thrive on structure. Why would it not be good for them to be on a schedule? I did what I felt was right for my son. I see all those guidelines as just that. Every kids is different, what works for one, may not work for the other.
@andak2007 (3229)
• Philippines
30 Aug 08
When i had my first baby, i have no idea at all what to do..everything is first time for me...so to help me out and to erase my anxiety..i attented seminars and forums on how to better take care of the baby..it really helped me a lot and i had been educated and well-informed. Now i laready have three kids, aged 3, 17months and a 2 month old...their gaps were just in a matter of months so its not that hard for me at all in terms of adjustment..i just used all my knowledge and my instincts as a mother in taking care of my babies.
@tlb0822 (1410)
• United States
28 Aug 08
I just did things the way I think is right. I do sleep my daughter on her back, but she usually rolls to her stomach anyway. They overwhelm you with all the new regulations, and safety changes. My daughter is 8 months old and my first. I just did what was instinct to me, and she is turning out wonderfully. Don't let all the new mumbo jumbo frighten you, or make you feel like a bad mother, trust me you'll know what to do.
2 people like this
@pehpot (4762)
• Philippines
28 Aug 08
just a question. why is it that now sleeping on stomach is a no no. my baby is 3 months old and he could only sleep through the night if he would sleep in his stomach. now I am worried..
• United States
28 Aug 08
I also hear that when they suck on a binki while sleeping, it reduces SIDS because as they suck, they breath. SIDS is caused from suffocation, right?
@di1159 (1580)
• United States
28 Aug 08
Wow, congrats on your pregnancy! You are very brave to have another after a 15 year stretch! I know what you mean, my niece is having one and I'm helping her set up the nursery and am amazed by all the "new" information and gadgets. First of all, stop worrying! You and the baby will adjust to each without the advice of the so-called experts. Obviously you did a good job the first time around! I think that Mother Nature provides parents with a special instinct that tells you whats right for you and your baby. Everyone is different and not everyone is comfortable with different systems. My mother tells me when I was a baby I slept on my stomach, had 'unapproved' stuffed anmials in my crib, (which had gaps between the rails which are now considered way to big), didn't have best formula due to money issues, etc, etc. It's a miracle I survived! Lol...... Trust yourself and what you think. You'll make all the right decisions. Good Luck!
• United States
28 Aug 08
Both my kids kind of had their own schedules. I listened to others about what I should or should not do, but when it came right down to it, I did pretty much what felt natural to me. You will be fine. Follow your instincts, they are still there. Enjoy your new baby and don't worry too much about what you are doing wrong, think of all the things you will do right.*S*
• China
28 Aug 08
i think they are maybe right for science is forword forever .it changes .i think you should use the new rules
@heaven11 (1159)
• United States
28 Aug 08
congrats and dont stress to much but the only sechdule i would really try to stick to is the feeding you know as well as i do they will make there own sechdule and there is nothing we can do about it also wait til they tell you to start taking your babies bottle away at 9-10 months old that they should be completly off the bottle ny 1 yr old that was strange to me and what about milk now they are saying after 3yrs old put them on 2% no mor whole milk things change so quickly i have a 3 1/2 yr old and a 2 year old they were 16 months apart and in taht short amount of time i was told so many diffrent things by drs it wasnt funny so do what you think is best dont fret everything will work out