My close friend she is still not talking to me.She wants me to go away..
By brisk123
@brisk123 (2823)
India
August 30, 2008 1:41pm CST
Hi,few days back I wrote about my friend and her mother and her abusive and drunkard husband.How he had tortured her mother for so many years and the mother finally decided to quit the relationship.I helped her mother to shift to new place with the help of one of my cousins and supported her decision for divorce.Due to this my friend is upset with me and I guess,she hates me too.
Today,I had a talked with her mother, but the daughter(my friend) she is still angry with me and not speaking to me.Still I am happy that her mother has found a new life again.She sounded happy and relax for the first time.I don't know whether my relationship with my friend has come to an end or yet to begin but I just wanted to speak with her for just once then she can decide whether to completely end this friendship or start a new beginning.I am feeling bad and sad.This is disturbing me a lot.I feel like some way down the line I had made a big mistake.This feelings won't go away easily.All I want is to say how sorry I am and hurt too,is there a way to make her understand or should I just end up the friendship with her,she had already told me to get lost and go away from her life.What should I do?
3 people like this
9 responses
@Tianna2 (1273)
• United States
30 Aug 08
It sounds like she needs time to sort things out. She's probably going through quite a bit right now with her parents just breaking up. I'm sure in time she will relize that you were doing the best thing for her mother and in the end it might bring you even closer.
I know how hard it can be when you feel like you are inbetween your best friend and her mother when her mother needs your help and your friend is blaming you for her parents breaking up. Just give some time and hope that she will relize that you did what was best for her mother.
Hugs, Tianna
1 person likes this
@brisk123 (2823)
• India
30 Aug 08
I just hope and pray that see realizes this.I am not saying she is making a mistake but I don't want to lose our friendship.I know,she is upset and mad at me,I can understand that but what I don't understand is how could she have forgotten our friendship and all these years I never did any wrong to her.I always had helped and supported her to go through and move on in life.I was always there for her like a sister,I guess,I am over reacting but it hurts.It is hurting me a lot.
2 people like this
@Tianna2 (1273)
• United States
30 Aug 08
I think she needs time to calm down. Right now she probably feels betrayed but when she calms down and thinks about everything she will come back. I relize you miss her and right now she probably doesnt feel as she can talk to you but that should change in time.
Hugs, Tianna
1 person likes this
@clocks123 (1225)
• United States
30 Aug 08
You did the right thing for your friend's mother. As for your friend, give her some time. If not, then move forward in knowing you did what you thought was best, and in my opinion, the right thing to do. best to you.
1 person likes this
@iyah10 (4115)
• Kuwait
31 Aug 08
No,you were doing good and great on this part my friend for I will also do the same thing if someone need my help very badly and even like this situation I also do the same thing you have from my friend in which I also remember before to whom both of my wife friend and I was so confused also but my wife keep on telling me that they were both our friends and I cannot manage to see on my wife friend to sleep in the road so we offer for her a place to sleep until the Husband know that the wife is in our house at first he is angry for me on why I step on their life but my wife and I keep on insisting to him that they were both our friends but on this time we need to choose and we see your wife(friend)need more help than you so he did not talked to me and to my wife for a week until they were both decide that be together again and my friend ask also forgiveness to my wife and to me as well but tell him to forget for if the person is angry things will happen so fast that are not in our hands so to your situation right now and to your friend the things I could tell on you is just to leave him for the meantime and give him space to think on the right way.......
1 person likes this
@sumiirajj (1983)
• India
31 Aug 08
Hi friend,What I feel is you talk to her and explain to her the reason behind your action.Tell her about how her mother feels and ask her mother also to talk to her about this.I know how much hurting it is to lose a good loving friend.Its unforgettable too.Dont worry ,she will realise soon.Have a great day.Happy mylotting.
@brisk123 (2823)
• India
31 Aug 08
Only if she is ready to sit and talk,then only I can tell her how I feel and make her see things right.I know how upsetting it must be.I can see how much her abusive father has an effect on her.I guess,she is used to seeing her mother abused and find it normal and doesn't bother to care how her mother feels and how much this is making her life miserable.
All she can think of right now is,false hope that things would have been good if her mother tolerated for some more years.This is foolishness,I mean this is how I project.Her mother has been suffering ever since she married him.Finally,she decided to get divorce which I believe is the best thing to do.She is not speaking with her mom too.Mom is upset because of her behaviour.Well, I will just have to wait till things gets bit better and see calms down.Wish me luck!
@CJay77 (4438)
• Australia
31 Aug 08
Hi brisk123, That is so nice of you to help your friends mother from being tortured with her husband! I can't believe that your friends let her mother to be abused by this man! I think you shouldn't feel bad of what have you done, what you did is absolutely right, and if your friend choose to be ignorant for your kindness, it's her lost not yours. I guess talk to her and try to explain your side, for sure she loves her mother and she would realise that what you've done is great. She just probably scared so much with her husband to step up, she may also needs some help as you said that her husband is abusive drunking man.
1 person likes this
@shana123 (2095)
• India
31 Aug 08
I can understand your feelings for your friend but you have not understood what is in your friend's heart and her feelings because she might have thought to live with her husband but you might have spoiled it , im sorry to say this but then why should your friend not speak to you if you feel you have done something right to to her? was she not speka a word by syaing NO when you protested to apply for the divorce? she must have done or else i dont know what is really bothering her.. try to speak to her mom about this try to understand what is really bothering her not to speak to you.. dont worry...
@Elixiress (3878)
•
31 Aug 08
I can understand why she is annoyed, because you have taken her father away. That being said I think you did the right thing and with time she will come round and thank you for it. If she lover her Mam then she will love the fact she is happy and I am sure she is still able to see her Dad whenever she wants. I think that there is very little you can do, except for give her time and she will eventually come round to agreeing that you did the right thing.
@brisk123 (2823)
• India
31 Aug 08
Well, I am, I guess a bad and one of the mean person's in her life now.I cannot tell her how hurt I am feeling.Neither I can understand what is inside her heart and mind.Maybe someday,she will come to know that I had my best intention not just for her mother but for her too.I don't want them to live with a guy who is less of husband and father and more of ferocious animal who can attack anytime.She loves her mother,but the thing is her mother wants divorce from her father and this is getting hard to digest for her.I just hope she grows up and thinks like a matured lady, and not like a 2year old kid.
