would you give a birthday gift to the person you like but doesn't like you?

i am actually laughing while i was reading your response! *peace* and then i told myself, here is the statement of someone who has a lot of experience with this kind of thing. *peace again* ^__~ but i must say, you do make a solid point and strong sense there sir. i must agree, people do kind things to others unconsciously expecting for something in return in the future. yes, good deeds are investments. supposed to be for our fate in the after life. but at times, those are investments for us to use in the future while we are still living. its kinda shameful but its human nature. its even stated in the golden rule, do not do unto others what you don't want to do unto you. you reap what you sow. so we can't be blamed for that. anyway, going back, now i don't know know what to say exactly. ^__^;; i do give gifts to guy friends but only during Christmas and not during their birthdays. so you would see what idea or impression this act would create to others especially to him. still, i want to give him something for him to remember me by always. something he can use everyday. not very special and flashy gift. would you be kind enough to make a suggestion sir??

well yeah, i am the one close and familiar with him. that's why its hard to think of a gift! its because his interests are so general. like watching movies, sports. i do know he likes Spongebob but i've given him a Spongebob towel before (it was easier for me then to give him a gift because there's only a few people then who knows i like him and we were teammates in volleyball and the gift was a practical gift). i mean, movies and sports are too general interests. what can i possibly give him that is sports-related or movie-related?

I see that while you were laughingly agreeing with what I have said, you even simplified what I have stated in better and simpler terms. Be them philosophical or innately from natural behavior that we often take for granted or not really think about when we toil in the things we do in our daily existence, you only blame if there is fault and their is fault when one's actions is considered wrong by not only the one who enacted it but, to others as well. So you look at birthdays more personal compared to any holiday. If you are clear with your intentions, it doesn't matter what ideas or impressions this self gratification would create to others, more so to him. Continue with what you want to give as something that would remind him of you which could be something he can use everyday. If I knew what that person familiarly does, I'd have a good idea on what to give but, since your the one who does know that person, your the one who should be having that good idea. (^_^")

you got me there kun. i will admit it. yes, there is still this little flicker of hope inside my heart that he might have a change of heart. its embarrassing but i cannot deny it to you! ^__^;; and i still don't take him as a friend. i still take him as the guy i like.

yes! girls are like that when it comes to love. takes a long time to forget. or until someone better comes along. yeah. you're right. but hey, i am really trying to get over him. i restrain myself from chatting with him, from seeing him. i just want to give him a gift so he can remember me in the future, that there's one secretbear who fell for him, once he went abroad.

lol =D Looks like i din know u for 1 yr, in vain.. lol =D Gals will be gals and when it comes to relationship tyoe of things, gals are much more sentimental and they dun forget easily till there someone better whom comes along ^_^ hehe TO gals, every guys will be special in their own ways and they can melt your heart and make it flicker in every little way they can.. lol

thanks for the encouragement lordwarwizard. if he was a tough guy, i think it would have been easier to give him a gift. but he is the guy who likes to "play" games. and his ego swells a lot if he learns that someone likes him. and i made the mistake of inflating his ego before when i told him i like him. unfortunately, no matter how he behaved stupidly, i still like him. ^__^;;

i am doing that actually. after those embarrassing moments, things i did that show i like him a lot, i lie low. i restrained myself from seeing him, going to places that i might see him, chatting with him, talking to him. but i still chat and talk with him once in a while only it would be chit chats and not long chat and talk so it wouldn't be too obvious that i am avoiding him. but i just couldn't let his birthday pass without me doing or giving anything. i still haven't gave anything yet. i'm still hesitant.

Oh gosh, you chose a challenging guy to love. Now now, I am beginning to think that playing hard to get might work better on him. Good luck!

one reason why i want to give him a gift is because i want him to remember me when the time comes that we won't be seeing each others again. he'll be working abroad you see. but i think you're right. i shouldn't put malice on it. but i'm sure other people would put malice over it! lots of them are teasing us after all.

well, then, it's there should be no problem why you should give him a gift. if that's something you want to give him as a remembrance or a souvenir, then he will appreciate that. just a small gift that would me good luck to all his endeavors and take care wherever he will be going.. so do it girl.. you can do it!

thanks austere. i already did. bought him a t-shirt. it was a very late gift and i forgot to write "belated happy birthday" to the card so he was asking why i gave him a tee-shirt. ^__^;;

there's really nothing wrong with it. but people's reaction would give meaning to it.

i'm way past that. i think. i have tried my best before to make him like me but to no avail. but i think i haven't given up. i'm giving him a gift not only to make him think of me but also in the hope that he might like me too in the future. i know nothing good will happen if i always think of what others might say but i just can't simply avoid it.

Yet,there are some actions you will get for sure .But that doesn't mean you can stop sending flowers to he or her,surely you should try you best to do something to get his or her heart.No pains no gain,it is a simple rule staying in many fields .Actions? Somebody's actions? They are just giving you some meanings,but they don't help you gain something you want.

hi m_sm! that's the problem with me. i think of the negative things the gift might do so until now, i haven't bought any. ^__^;;

you're right. there's nothing wrong with it. we are not hurting anyone with it. its just that in our conservative society, people are so judgmental especially on women. its hard to fight it especially if the guy doesn't like me back.

its just okay girl. I was once like you before. But as time passes by, I made to realize, why do I care of what they will be thinking as long as Im not hurting other people and it will not ruin the rules of women!

hi shaun! well that's not really embarrassing since he gave you a gift too. i am hesitant in giving the guy a birthday gift because he might laugh at me secretly for being head over heels over him. ^__^;;

That is true at the same time maybe he will think later on this girl must really like me a lot. He might feel differently later on so it's worth taking a chance.

right. there's always other possibilities. but its scary to look at the positive possibility. i might get disappointed.

i wasn't really expecting for something in return. i actually kinda felt bad because he gave me a keychain gift in return. i would have preferred if he didn't.

hi grecy! i'm glad you are having fun reading about my lovelife. ^__^;; at least you are not sad for me. i don't want people to be sad of me because i already am sad for myself but i'm happy too to have this kind of feeling. ^__~ i still haven't seen him wear the shirt i gave him but its fine with me. we chat once in a while over ym but i really don't see much of him since i kinda of avoiding places where i might see him. ^__^;;

i was amused when i learned the first time that he likes Spongebob. it was a coincidence because i like Spongebob too. ^__~ yep, i gave him a tee-shirt. i just hope he takes it as a belated gift from a friend and not from a girl who likes him.

Yea I'm sure. It's normal for friends to exchange gifts.

thanks for the response john. although i wouldn't want to expect something like that after giving a gift. it hurts to get disappointed.

the sad thing here is, what if he/she doenst want to take it and even insulted you. i think i would just turn back and forget it.

then i should be thankful that he didn't refuse the gift. he accepted it. ^__^

hi hatley! ah! but you have a different case! i would understand if you wouldn't want to give that mean lady a gift. she doesn't deserve any gifts! anyone who doesn't know how to appreciate things given to them doesn't deserve to be given anything. yes lordwarwizard. i like the guy. sige, ipagdiinan mo pa.

But Patsie, secretbear loves that guy so that's what important.

awww.. that's the ideal thing to do and to think. i truly like him but i don't want to be laughed at too. i have lots of pride in me and giving him a gift is like admitting to him and to whomever would know about the gift that i am head over heels with this guy and i'm hopeless and i just can't bear the thought that people might pity me or laugh at me.

act naturally? now that's hard to do. i always get shy whenever i'm near him. ^__^;; i can't even talk casually. and oh no, i don't give heart chocolates! not even if its Valentine's day. i've never done that.

well, act naturally, even though you think everybody will now, they probably wont, just try not to blush and give him a normal present, not something that could be like a heart or valenteins day gift. belive me, it's emberrasing, but it'll show him you care and that you don't care if anybody else laughs at you for loving him.

he is stupid enough or just playing dumb. ^__^;; he still asked why i gave him a gift. isn't it obvious??

that's what i thought too! it would feel like i'm forcing my way into his life. forcing him to notice me. but i erased that thought and gave him a gift anyway. ^__^;;

thanks for the response switlyf.

hi jill! i did. thanks.

yeah. i lost money but i was happy with it. ^__~ i actually feel like buying another t-shirt whenever i go to the men's section of a department store. ^__^;;

hi kethy! i do hope i am not an unwelcome person in his life. i'm slowly trying to accept that we could only be friends, just as how he only wants it.

then he's probably nice because he said thank you and gave me a keychain as a return gift.