What's your LOVE language?
By divinegwapa
@divinegwapa (914)
Philippines
September 12, 2008 5:17am CST
Ever heard of the five love languages? I encountered the concept in a certain book (sorry, forgot the author). But according to the book, there are five love languages namely touch, service, words of affirmation, gifts and lastly quality time.
How would you know yours? Well, just pick among the five the one which makes you feel loved the most whenever other people do that to you. For example, if someone spends quality time with that's when you feel that you are loved.
As for me, my primary love language is touch. I always want my family and friends to give me a hug, a kiss on the cheek or a pat in the back because that's when I feel I am truly loved.
According to the author, all five are our love languages but there is one or two that ranks higher among the five. So, which one is your primary love language? ^^
3 people like this
19 responses
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
12 Sep 08
[i]Hi divinegwapa,
Now that I am married, I will choose quality time! Sometimes for couple who are both working and tried, it is hard to spend time together since one of you wants to nap and the one one wants to unwind while watching movie or whatsoever! SO, it will be hard if the two will not be able to find ways to be together so for me, quality time is very significant for me to feel that I am loved and he needs me and vice versa![/i]
1 person likes this
@checapricorn (16061)
• United States
16 Sep 08
[i]I agree divine...hubby and I also try to dine out once a month and strolling in the mall also once a month as our way to change the daily routine!
When you are married, you will feel that that is most important specially when job is stressful and when you are home, you are both tired and all you want to do is sit down, relax, watch TV and ready to sleep![/i]
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
I have friends who are married also and most of them say that the best love language for married couple would be quality time as well. In fact, some of them have a once a month date with their hubby, just the two of them dining in a fine restaurant and enjoying each others' company. ;D
1 person likes this
@kun2349 (23381)
• Singapore
12 Sep 08
For me, my priamry love language will be service ^_^ I dun really care for hug or pat on the back, all i want is to have somebody to listen to me ^_^
Just listen.. Because i know i won't listen to anybody's advice, but i will still know what to do, and thus i only want that particular person to listen to me ^_^ I just wanna let go of everything that's troubling me or bothering me, and i also allow myself to be vulnerable at times ^_^
ANd once, i manage to do that, i will be ok and fine again ^_^ hehe
1 person likes this
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
You are indeed a person who loves to receive service. Sometimes, all we really need are people who will listen. They don't need to offer any advice at all. To listen would be more than enough.
1 person likes this
@p3halliwel2005 (3156)
• Philippines
12 Sep 08
hmmmm..I just heard this from you but for me words of affirmation and quality time tops it all off on my list. Touch can be given by anyone..hugs..kisses..that's common for me although I love to be hugged and kissed. Service..I don't know what you mean about that one though...Gifts are also something common and I do love gifts as well..words of affirmation for me are sometimes not easy to say...sometimes you get loss for words..when someone tells me how much they love me through words and how much I am important to them it touches me deep inside..and time spent together by the person you love with you is showing that he'd rather be with you than with anybody else..
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
Service would mean you feel loved the most when your loved ones cook for you. Basically, serving you. Actually, we all want to receive all five.
@austere (2812)
• Philippines
12 Sep 08
guess, that would be touch for me.. action speaks louder than words as they say!hehe but really, i appreciate being cuddled, kissed, and embraced by someone i love... when you make me feel loved by how you treat and hold me, then there is no need for me to hear the words..:) the second in the list for me would be words though.. because somehow hearing the words of affirmation makes you trust more, especially when you see the sincerity in his words.. ohh.. i love loving!hehehe
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
12 Sep 08
same here..^^ keep lovin' coz life rocks when everybody loves everybody! :D
1 person likes this
@Jezebella (1446)
• United States
12 Sep 08
The book is called The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman, I just finished reading it. It is a wonderful book. My language is touch: holding hands, hugs, kisses, his arm around me in public etc. along with quality time and the two go hand in hand cause you can't hold hands without being together right haha.
the five are:
Words of Affirmation i.e You look great, I appreciate you taking out the garbage etc.
Quality Time i.e playing games, talking (without tv) hiking, biking etc
Gifts
Service
Physical Touch ie hugs, kisses, massage etc.
1 person likes this
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
Thanks for the info. ;D I think I encountered the book a few years back. I so agree with you. Quality time and touch do go hand in hand. Time would be my second love language. ;D
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
12 Sep 08
Hi, divinegwapa,
I love a good hugs and a kiss from my family and friends too, I am a touchy person because my mother always used to hug us so that is why we are like that.
Tamara
1 person likes this
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
I'm a touchy person as well. That's how it is in our family. But I would love to receive gifts as well. ;D
@mimpi1911 (25464)
• India
12 Sep 08
Hi divine
I think mine would be quality time. Nothing like giving or having or enjoying quality time with your loved ones. It means the world to me. "touch" is also important but I would stress on quality time and for me material things would come last.
Thanks for a nice discussion.
1 person likes this
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
quality time is my second love language. yes, i agree with you. nothing compares to having a quality time with your loved ones. :D
@sweetcouple (221)
• India
15 Sep 08
to me more than anything a patient ear is more important. always be a good and patient listener to your partenr. and then looks. you look at a person is an iritated way the other person gets hurt and will seldom want you ot htem to see your such looks. then spending quality time, and even in the little time just a love look, or a love wink, or even a love smile is enough to boost the otehr person' spirits.
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
Yes, true. Each one of us need someone who will listen to us. ;D
@LoovesAmethyst (351)
• Philippines
13 Sep 08
Hi Gwapa :) I'd go for three: quality T-I-M-E & words of affirmation. These are most important languages that I consider and my primary love language. I needed to hear that some people would care and love me and I never miss an opportunity to tell some people that I care for them and I love them. And spending quality time also makes me feel I am loved, so whenever I am free from work, I spend most of my time with my family as much as possible. :)
@LoovesAmethyst (351)
• Philippines
17 Sep 08
I just heard it the way rappers sing in their song about "T-I-M-E". I find it kinda cute though, so..:) LOL
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
Good for you that you're making everyday count by spending time with your family. Indeed, love is spelled T-I-M-E. ;D
1 person likes this
@senjacob (124)
•
12 Sep 08
as per my law,touch is the most wonderful thing in the world...
we can show our love to everyone if we are touch with them continuosly..
suppose if we far away from us means w cannnot show our love to them...
secondly words is the main thing.because god creaed the world by his words only and now thw world is still exists by his words..
word is the most essential releif factor of our life.
suppose if we feel lonely,someone come and express his love to say some words means we become happy at the moment..
every problem we have is solved by sharing this to others by our words..
and we can come out from the problems by our neighbour's lovable words...
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
12 Sep 08
what you said are so true. Sometimes, I do want people to appreciate me with words. It's comforting and refreshing. ^^
1 person likes this
@iyah10 (4115)
• Kuwait
14 Sep 08
For me the first and primary love is the quality of time of the person which is the number one category for me for it is not easy for someone to give us their quality time and the rest are follows like touch, and affirmation of words are the third one and the rest are follows.
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
18 Sep 08
So true. Everyone seems to be really busy nowadays, with so much thing to do we seldom find time to spare for the people we love. I really appreciate people especially friends who take time to go out with me despite their busy schedules. ;D
@rina312 (296)
•
12 Sep 08
Hi there. For me my primary love language would be quality time. I always feel love the most if someone spends quality time with me frequently. To me, it shows that other person wants to be near me all the time. If I love a person, I'd definitely want to be with that person all the time or else I will feel something is missing. :) Happy mylotting!
1 person likes this
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
12 Sep 08
That's my second love language. Even if you don't say anything to each other as long as you're together. ^^ thanks for sharing.
1 person likes this
@mitiy6065 (74)
• China
12 Sep 08
I think it's touch at first.I love that feeling,touching,kissing.But I think quality time is great,we can touch in the quality time,do so much things more than touch.
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
yes, you can actually do all five with quality time. nice insight. :D
@carmela0210 (1591)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
hmmm, can i choose two??i love the combination of touch and quality time!!!touch because im more on actions, and quality time cause if a guy spends time to a girl he should be really loving that girl.
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
Sure. ;D Actually, we want to receive a combination of all five. That's my two as well, touch and time respectively. Happy lovin'!
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
12 Sep 08
Hi divinegwapa,
Yes for me its the same I love hugs from my family and friends and kind words as well, but I do like a big hug and and kiss.
Tamara
@wiseshopping1 (679)
• China
13 Sep 08
my mother language is chinese, my second language is english, i have learned it well, i can use it well.
but i still want to learn more japanese, because i used to touch it, i have learned two years when i was in university. i want to learn more in order to get more business chance in my life.
as for other languages, i know some of them are very important in business, but i won't plan to learn, because i never get near from it, i never know about it, if i learn, i have to cost to much time and energy.
@manjalvaanam (272)
• India
12 Sep 08
words of affirmation , is the one which i feel the best love language...some small appreciation,scoldings,motivating words, from family members is what i expect to be felt loved.....as you said touch is one of the best but i like words rather touch....happy myloting
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
12 Sep 08
That's a good point. Even if we are scolded we also feel loved because that only means they care. :D
@rahulrome2002 (5)
•
12 Sep 08
according to me love words are those which not only fill you with joy,happiness,arousal n respect but also the feel for life.i think love plays a vital role in our mlife n it should be done in the right way.
@divinegwapa (914)
• Philippines
15 Sep 08
We should always make sure that are loved ones know how much we love them. Thus, expressing love in words would mean a lot. Thanks for your response.