fosamax and osteonecrosis of the jaw

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Help...Help...Help!!! That's what I'm pleading for...When I was 30 I had to have a radical hysterectomy and a few years later I was given a bone scan to be a base-line result of my bone status and was horrified to learn that I already had Osteoporosis. A few years later a study was being done on FOSAMAX and I was lucky to be given it. A further bone scan revealed that it was actually working to strengthen my bones and reverse the damaging effects of the osteoporosis. HOWEVER... I read an article on this drug and the fact that it can cause Osteonecrosis in the jaw (jaw death) if any dental treatment eg., tooth extraction, implants, surgery were done. I stopped it and low and behold the next week I got a tooth absess. My dentist referred me on to the dental hospital to get an Apisectomy done ( a procedure at the tip of the root where they have to remove a small portion of the bone). However, when the surgeon found out that I had been on Fosamax, all-be-it I had stopped taking it, he refused to do anything (quite relieved)..He explained about the real risk of this necrosis and was actually dealing with a woman at that time who had had a tooth extracted and was badly affected. Luckily after some antibiotics, the absess calmed right down but the problem is still there waiting to flare up again at any time. I also have a back tooth which was crowned and I've been getting some problems with it and it looks like it might have to be extracted in the near future.....but, how can I let them take it out if it means that I might end up with no jaw left???!! I'm worried sick. I had to start taking the Fosamax again because my bones were suffering from not being on it and apparently it doesn't really matter - once you have it in your system it stays in for 10 years anyway so it's not like I could get the treatment done if I don't take it for a few months. I am only 40 and have osteoporosis which at my age NEEDS to be treated quite aggressively but I've never had good teeth and get absesses etc., frequently but am terrified to let them touch my teeth for fear of the outcome. Anyone got any good advice out there for me?