My son

This is just plain mean of the other children that are doing this . It happens all over and I don't believe that you not beign around is causing this to happen because children will always find something to pick on another child about and if it wasn't this they would find something else to pick on him about . Have your tried discussing this with his teacher or the pricipal ? I realize this is hard for both your son and yourself because no parent wants to see their child hurt but other then talking to your son and explaining to him that these other kids are just trying to get a reaction out of him , I can't think of what more you could do other then talking to the teachers at the school and the pricipal . If the teachers would be willing to do something they could put in play some kind of program that would reward children for doing something nice for others in their classroom that they would not normally do . Either saying something nice or helping somebody out that was being teased . This would encourage other children to come to his defense when he was being picked on but would not single him out because those that were helping out would reciee some kind of reward for their behavior . It wouldn't have to be a big reward but something . In the school where my children go they have this in place for the children . For the younger children it might be a pencil , eraser or sticker that they would be rewarded with while in the older grade it might be something bigger like a day to play the teacher or a box of donuts or just something that would make them willing to try to be nicer to their peers . Best of luck and I wish I could offer more because it really is so hard when your child is the one being picked on for any reason , but I don't think you should blame yourself for not being able to be with him as often as you would like because these bullies would find another reason to pick even if you were around .

Honestly, I think the best thing for you to do is just to make sure that your son knows that you love and support him no matter what. You can talk to him about the teasing, and let him know that it's not his fault, and that he didn't do anything wrong. Even if your son is gay, or acting effeminately, it shouldn't give other kids the right to treat him that way and he needs to know how much you love and support him. I imagine it's been hard with you having been gone for the last year, but don't beat yourself up about it. You've been away working hard to provide for your family, and that is a very commendable thing.

How old is your son?? IS the also the eldest in the family or the youngest?? Because that plays an important part on his behaviour too.. Maybe what your wife should do is that, let your son be exposed more to the outside world, let him explore with his friends, let him hang out with his frenz more.. And also, how does he react when his frenz called him 'gay'?? If he is angry or showed his temper, then it's not as bad as what u think ^_^

Kids can be so horrible. How old is your son? If you think his effeminate behavior is affected by your absence are there any other males that he could hang out with while you're gone, another family member, a best friend, or a god parent. Perhaps even the father of one of his friends. I think what is most important is that your wife instill in him a good sense of self confidence to help him learn to ignore the stupid teasings of his peers.

Kids can be so cruel. Maybe you could try spnding some one on one tim with your son when you can. Just you & him talking man to man (I'm sure he thinks his at 9! LOL) and doing father son activities. Seperate him from the girls on occasion and if your scehdule doesn't allow this often enough talk to a good friend of yours and ask them to stop by on a certain day and take him out. It's probably easier for your wife to just include him in the girls activities rather than try to seperate it. Not faulting her or anything just saying if you or a friend could it would make it easier on her too! Also make it a point to share those activities with the girls and allow them to share their girl events with him.