Sweet turned sour

This is simple... The sweet man had the inferority complex from the beginning. His jealousy is a symptom of his insecurity and most likely he has been abandoned in the past. This is what he fears the most and his insecurities worsen as he feels threatened that she too will abandon him. If she Loves him then she should shower him with Love and affection and she will in time see his insecurity fade and the sweet guy will re-emerge. He simply wants to feel secure in the relationship. Once he feels secure he'll be like most men wanting their space. Then she'll wonder what happened to that Love sick clingy guy.

would get out as soon as I could break that engagment now! MAybe he thinks it is getting close to getting papers on her. as some men think that is a licence to treat the woman any way they want to and they own the woman which isnt right!. So I would get her to leave him now!

get rid of him someone that possessive and dependant becomes violent most of the time!

I would tell her to leave this relationship as soon as possible. There is not one reason that she should stay with him. she is lucky she saw who he is in this stage of the relationship, if she had married this guy it would be alote harder. so..i do hope that she finishes what she started and get out of this very big problem.

I'll do exactly what you advice her to do...there is no way I'm gonna be living with a monster and live my life to hell with him..I'd rather cut it off now that I still got chance and choice rather than regret it and hope he will change and tied up with the piece of paper already...that's better to do than get married...

Good day.. There is only one way to react. If she thinks that he could never change and he's behavioral changes is more psychiatric than emotional then I think she should for the moment cancel the relationship. It's hard to get into a marriage or a life time commitment when problems like possessiveness and obsessiveness are just outside the door.

Your friend needs to run FAR FAR AWAY!!!! When my husband and I first met, we'd both had our fair share of past problems, and we danced around eachother for quite a while, quizzing and questioning eachother to make sure that we woudln't change. He'd been married to a woman who changed as soon as he'd married her, and I was told by one of my parents that the other had changed after the wedding. Hubby didn't want crap again, and I didn't want to go through it the first time. We were lucky.

I would tell her to get out before it is too late also. I have been in those types of relationships in the past and they are not anything to play around with.

[i]Hi zandi, trust is very important in a relationship and if this guy can't trust her, that will be an ultimate problem and heartache in the future and in their daily life...I will advice her to talk to this man heart to heart and then tell him how irritating and how burden is that in their relationship.... Hopefully, he will learn to trust![/i]

Advice your friend to leave that guy alone.

I would have told her the same thing you did, get out. I wouldn't put up with that kind of behavior for two minutes. I think a very small amount of jealousy is just human nature, but when it becomes an obsession....then it's out of hand. And if he is acting like this now, before they are even married, it will only get worse once she says "I do". I hope she gives the ring back, packs up and leaves him far behind. And I hope she cuts all ties with him if she does leave him. And if he 'appeared violent and dangerous' odds are he will be once they are married.

This is not the kind of person she would want to be tied down with for the rest of her life. She would be miserable and probably having to watch her back constantly. When someone sees these bad qualities in someone, they need to get out as soon as possible.Doesn't matter that she's engages; break the engagement today! My granddaughter had a boyfriend recently that was shooting her lots of bull, telling her he loved her after 2 months. She is young, sort of naive, but mostly that she really cared for her last boyfriend and he treated her dirty, and they broke up for good, so she was on the rebound. He shot her some good lines, was talking her into moving out of her home because 'her family didn't care anything about her and he did'. Man, when her Mother and older brother found out about this, and they told us, we all jumped on the bandwagon, talking to that girl. We knew he was deceiving her and she was eating it up. We kept telling her that he was only wanting to get her moved out and he would then tell her what to do. Her mother was taking her car, cell phone and anything else she had paid for. We knew that she would have to have a way to work, and she'd never be able to attend the ball games at her old high school. This guy was 5 years older than her, had his joys and now wanted to take over her young years. WE were having no part of it. Well, we got her away from him, thanks in part to her older brother that told him in no uncertain terms NEVER to have one thing to do with her again or he'd be sorry. Then, other day, she told her Mother how he had really treated her. He had broken down her self-esteem, and they'd be talking about something, and he'd say, "Oh, I forgot your stupid, you are just 18." Man, when I heard that, I wanted to go after him myself. She is anything but stupid,but she was on the rebound and he knew it, so he used it to his advantage. We had heard similar things from other girls, but it took some hanging in there by family members to make sure she'd never see him again. Now she is just playing the field, and right now seeing a very nice boy that is in college and going to make a lawyer.

I would go ahead and brake us with him considering she is not married yet this is a good time to do so. If she is having issues with him now waiting would just make it worse.

I think she should probably get out, marriage will either mellow him out or make him 100 times worse. It is not a gamble she would want to take.

it may be some psychological problem with that guy. elkse why should he behgave like this? i have seen this type of transformation in some relationship where th eperson started acting violently after.

Hi zandi... What would I do? I'd run for the hills as fast as my feet could carry me!! Or as fast as my car could fly!! I've been in that sort of situation when I was just a kid, 18 years old and had the day lights smacked out of me so many times that I can't count. When he broke my foot, I left for it was the final straw. He went for my throat but I had kicked him but not hard enough and that's when he tackled me and beat the living hell out of me. Never ever again did I stay in such a relationship. The first sign of abuse, I was gone!! Now I'm married to a wonderful man who I would do anything for as he would for me.

zandi I would tell your friend that it is good to find out now before she g ets married to him, what he really is, and break it off right now while she is unattached. I would kick him to the curb so fast he wou ldbe dizzy with it. A life with him would be really awful and she can dodge that right nowwith just a few guts and some back up if necessary . tell her to geou

If still the relationship has not been converted into the wed-lock, she may have to think it again and if possible get rid of it before the balloon blast. I am thinking that if I am in the place I would have nullified the things once for all but here is the problem of heart,how we can.... Tell your friend not to run after but be slow and watch, if the things resolves then get more time or prolong the proceedings as more it can be. May be the things become normal by the time. I think it will work, if not the end is there. How you see my suggestion please comment and have a nice day.

It's too bad that most of the time it's too late already that we realize the bad habits of the person we love. Also most of the time it's too late to change them. I think separating from a relationship is better than staying there only to suffer in the end. I hope the guy changes so that no one gets hurt in the end.

If I were in her shoes, I would leave now before it is too late. The problems she sees now will only get worse once they are marriage. Be a good friend to her as she walks through this. She may need you.