Do you have a problem with other people respecting your "time"?

Amazing that she would ask you when she does nothing all day. But, I have always heard that if you want something done give it to the busiest person you know, and THEY Will get it done! On the other hand about me. I do what I can to make money online. I have friends of family complaining at me that they can't get a hold of me, or my phone number was busy was then tried to call.. I am like what part of I am working don't you understand,. I am thinking that it is because I am at home that they think I can talk to them.. or if they see me online they start to Message me. That is ok I know that they do not know what I am doing at the moment. So I will answer them and then say that I am working..I wish they would understand that just because I do not leave the house does not mean that I am not trying to do what I can. So I am at a loss with it. I do not know how to make people think that My time for doing what I need to do is important!

Hi jillhill. Gosh, you sure do sound like a busy person! Can't imagine getting a book written while working full time! That doesn't hardly seem possible. Plus the other typing and editing job and a craft sale? You no doubt are one of those incredibly energetic people. I do think a task or two falls to me because I'm the only member of my family of origin that works only part time (the other 2 work full time). I do usually try to do as people ask because of that. But, I also talk, rather descriptively, about the other tasks I have to do so that people don't get the idea that I'm laying around on my days away from work. Also, if I've already agreed to do one thing and they try to get me to do another, I say something like, "I can do either of those--make the flowers and table decorations or make the invitations. Which would you like me to do?" I must say that I can certainly understand how you could feel tired just thinking about doing all that stuff, because it sounds like it's alot! Could you buy the invitations as opposed to making them? That seems it will take a lot more time to design, create, and finish them otherwise. Good luck in completing all these tasks. Hang in there.

I am tired just reading that list. No, I don't have problem with people respecting my time because i say no I can't if I am too busy to so things.I give them a rain check but I don't take on things I Know I don't have time for.

Hi Jill, Well they do say if you want something done ask a busy person. I am like this and usually end up running around helping others all I can and also being elected to whilst trying to work, bring up my son, run my own home etc etc and at times I feel like screaming 'what about me, I'm a human being not a blo*dy robot' grrr so I know where you are coming from on this. The one thing I have learnt to say over reccent years though is the word NO, practice it, it is great and people stop taking the P. Huggles. Ellie :D

Ohh hun you sound extremely busy you need at least and extra week to fit all that in no wonder your stressed. I also have this problem so i'm not going to be able to give you advise on it chickidee but i can understand your frustration. I really need to learn how to say no peeople are forever ringing me for advice or help especially on it issues and i love helping people out but i have noticed that some of these people are not so interested in helping back. I have recently started calling in favours i never ask as i'm always the one doing things for other people and alot of the people i have done several things for in the past have now fell of the face of the earth. Where as others are bending over backwards so i have come to the conclusion that i am going to start taking names and for those that help me i will continue and for those that don't i will explain that i'm not freelancing so hence the charge for my time is.... i'm betting i have alot less phone calls. I can help with the invitations if you want i'm pretty good at it can send you some samples if you want i did one for taty last week should only take me a day max.

Actually, I think there are really people who value their time more that anyone else's. I have the same problem. I try to follow a fixed schedule so that I can alot time for everything, but there are people who like to ruin my schedule by setting up meetings or important agendas at the last minute. I hate that, because I might already have something to do scheduled for that and there will be a conflict. I point it out sometimes, but it gets tedious to always remind them that they have to be considerate of other people. I mean, they are not the ones who are busy, so they must learn to respect others.

You might explain to your sister-in-law that you are crunched for time and need her help. Maybe she can make the table decorations and get you off the hook for the shower. Sounds like you are just slammed with work. I don't think there is any real way to make someone respect your time other than to tell them no, you can't do something. I found a way that really works to get out of doing things when time is limited. Play dumb. Sometimes it's not playing either but it gets me out of doing things I can't or don't want to do. If I have time and know how to make whatever project I am suppose to be making or doing, I will do it. People will offer to help if they think I'm some dummy that can't find my way out of a paperbag. It might be a lame way to handle things but it works well for me.

I would make it clear that I am a busy person and that you cannot comply with their whims whenever they feel like. I would talk frankly with my sister in law that although I love her company my time is really restricted for her.

sat down and tell her, that you are busy how will she know if you don,t tell her are you could include her in your schedule and let her help you that way you and her could spend time together get it all done really she could help you.sounds like she just misses you and want to spend time with you.if you have no time this is a good way for her to spend some time.you said she don,t work call her out and ask her. so you want feel over worked.

i can sympathize. i do not "work" outside the home but i do work from home and make my own hours and schedule so i am very flexible. i get asked for favors alot, and do not get me wrong, i love my family but i have my own things to take care of and i do not ask anyone for any help. i give of myself when and if i can and i always make time to do at least one good deed per day but when people assume you just have time to do whatever then it gets annoying. i have learned to just say "no". no apologies. i just i cannot and leave it at that. if people do not understand they will get over it and if they don't that is their problem.

Here is what you do, make a list of ALL the things that you are working on , hand HER the list and tell her that you can make time for what she wants to do if SHE completes something on your list. And yes i relize that she probably can't do anything on your list it will serve to show her that you have no spare time to devote to something that she can do just as well. Or just do what i used to do when i worked all the time and say NO, SORRY!

Yes I have that as well, I have learned in the last three months to tell then all NO. When they say what I say here let me tell you again. NO. And yes I mean it. I can't I don't want to. And you know I'm just to busy taking a bath for once. Please give me my time. PLEASE. That didn work. for about two weeks. Then had to just not answer phone.lol

time is big part of life. and every think run by time.and iam student so i respet time because i need the ful time for my study.so i try to save my time and all people try to save thier time. many time my friend go outside for fun and they foce me to go with them .but i try to ignor them and try to save my time

Well, its her duty to know that you are not free for all these stuffs... your sis in law should contribute somewhere... as she cant just live like that. in today's life, no one has free time, everywhere everybody is in a big hurry, so its ourself who make the importance of time... if we think and work as if our time is lot important to us, then other automatically respect your time... and if we impose like we are not bothered about our time then no one is going to care about how much time they waste out of your life.

I think this is a tricky thing for people to understand because everyone sort of assumes things about other people. I have friends who are pretty busy, and they make funny comments to me - the other day someone commented to me that "at least you have time off' - except that I work more than 50 hours every week and still have to prepare lessons, purchase supplies, and mark kids' work. I just smiled, because I know she's very busy and all she can see about other people is the time that they have free, not the time that they are working. My family just assumes I am working all of the time. Accolades are given if I go to a movie or take a day off. So if I do something for a family member, they are appreciative.

Yes, I do. I think part of it is because I am in a wheelchair and part of it is because I work at home. When you're in a wheelchair people assume you have no life other than waiting for them. Sorry, not the case. In the past 2 days I've had 4 interviews for new help and no one has shown up to even one of them. I'm sorry but there's more to my life than sitting around waiting for you especially when you want to be my employee. Also I work at home writing on the internet and people assume falsely that that means I can just drop whatever I'm doing and help them or do something for them when they need me to. I want to be like, "I'm sorry, this is my job. Go away and come back in an hour!"

I am a Wish List Moderator on a Yahoo Group Board. I'm having trouble getting them to update their wish lists. They want me to drop everything. I think many are disrespecting me and wonder why they think their time is more important than mine.

[i]Hi jillhill, wow..sounds so busy really! ANyway, I never experienced that because when I am very occupied already, i will not accept task anymore from friends! In your case, maybe they failed to realize that and just assume that you have all the time to concentrate on the task being assigned to you! [/i]

One thing i don't like is somebody taking my time.One thing i want to say is foolish people wait money but fools waste time.Every passing minutes and every passing second in our lives when sum up becomes many years in our lives,so anyone that wait my time is a bad person and such a person need to be avoided

At first, I used to get bombarded with phone calls from friends wanting me to visit with them when I was starting a full time job that took up the majority of my day. I don't get as many annoying phone calls now but one in particular bothers me. My mother... she's my mother so of course I love her and respect her but she's as scheduled as I am. She'll call me and ask me if I can visit with her. Of course I tell her sure. Instead of telling me what day she has in mind, she'll continuously ask me my preferences. I really don't have time during the week to do anything and on the weekends, I love to sleep in and then spend the rest of my days doing all my running around and house cleaning. So I'll tell her that I can make time to visit on Sunday. She then responds telling me that Sunday won't work for her and she'd rather do it maybe Saturday or Thursday... and how about we meet here at 10 A.M. on Saturday. It drives me crazy! I don't want to disrespect her or seem as though I never have time but I am so tired and I have too much on my plate. There really isn't any way to make people respect your time because everyone wants what they want. Either way they'll be disappointed but eventually they'll get the message and leave you alone.