Seeing a little baby today made me feel so sad.......

with every diaper, babywipe, babyfood, child care item commercial ever shown on television. with every carriage i see, every cry i hear, every pregnant women who happens by. ;sigh; as you know, mal and i have been trying since june for baby number 3.. and no luck. so i do understand that feeling yer having.

I'm sorry gemini_rose that you are so sad about not being able to ever have children again. But, as you said... you already have four children. How old are they, may I ask? Are they all grown up and out of the house or are any of them still at home? You are right about the fact that you will eventually have grandchildren! That is something wonderful to look forward to! And, as my mom loves to remind me... she can spoil her grandchildren rotten and then send them home to mommy. LoL! With four children of your own, I am sure you will have quite a few grandchildren to look forward to! I understand what you are saying though about not being able to ever have your very own newborn baby again to hold. They are so sweet and cute at that age. My son is almost 14 years old. He is my only child... so far! I am not sure if I will have any more children or not. I am remarried after a divorce from my son's father and we have been married just over four years. He doesn't have any children of his own so we might have a child or two together. I am only 39 but do have some pretty serious medical problems right now and I'm on nerve pain medication that would be very difficult to go off of, so I'm just not sure what will happen down the road in that respect. My feeling about whether or not I want to have any more children changes every few hours, so who knows! LoL! Some days I feel like I'd love to have another child or two, then the next I think about how great it would be to have the freedom to travel and go anywhere on a whim with my husband if we so choose. I don't know. Like yesterday morning when my son was about to drive me up a wall when he was arguing with me I would have tied my tubes right then & there if I could have! Just kidding. But, then like just last night when my 5'10" 13 year old son wasn't feeling so well from a bad headache and he layed his head on my lap so I could give him a head rub in hopes he would feel better... times like that I'd love to have about 10 more kids! Who knows, maybe you'll have 10+ grandchildren to spoil some day! Take care.

It is a very common feeling shared by many women, the psychological term is called empty nest. Every mother bird wants a little baby bird in her nest to take care of, it is not quite the same when they are older and can do for themselves and much worse once they all leave home. Hon it is normal, sometimes I think that way for about a second or two and then I snap back to reality and say no way, at my age and my health, yeah right!

I understand how you feel. If you were capable of having more children, you would not want another, it's the fact that you can't that makes you sad. You aren't able to choose not to... you're forced not to. I think everyone gets that feeling when they're around a newborn. They think for a brief moment that it would be so nice to have another baby, even if they really don't want one. I felt the way you did once, and I hadn't even seen a baby to make me feel that way. It was sometime in Spring of last year, so about a year and half ago. My youngest at the time was about to turn a year. My twins were heading into kindergarten. My oldest was heading into his last year in elementary school. I just started thinking about how my children were growing up so fast. My husband had a vasectomy while I was pregnant for my 4th child, so in my mind I knew there was no way to have another baby. I think that's where my sadness was really coming from. But to my surprise I did end up becoming pregnant again. It was of course a complete accident. Apparently hubby's procedure didn't work, lol. So it was a pleasant surprise. Now that I know hubby isn't actually fixed, and we are capable of having more children, I'm definitly completely against the idea, lol. 5 is plenty.

I cannot have any children and it always pains my heart whenever I see children getting hurt or abused. Otherwise I loved to play with them and whenever I have things I will give it to them. But I would like to know why would you be sad knowing that you have delivered four children. It is person like me who never give birth would be sad whenever we pass children on the road. I have know my condition since a child that I will be unable to have children so I don't make it brother me. As I said earlier it is only when they are being abused and sad things happen to them my heart bled. Cheer up Gemini and continue to care for your children the best way you can. Just ask God to give you the health and strength to see them pass the worst, married good and give you some grands so that you can have the feel of young ones in your arms again. Be Strong.

well my babies are both still little, and we are planning on having more. but i understand what you are saying. my husband only wants one more- i would like two. but i know whenever we reach that stopping point that i will be so sad knowing that there won't be anymore. :(

I know what you mean....I know how when i just had a baby. Well after getting my tubes tied it hit me that this is it for me no more babies. I just knew my body is not capable of having a baby again. Ill just have to hope for many grandkids in many years. Even though i have a newborn now i know how fast they grow. She wont be so cuddly for long. I love the newborn stage so much.

Have you ever thought about dpoing volunteer work at a pediatric hospital? They always need volunteers and it would be a great way to hold and tend to babies etc. Just a though. I miss small children but I now have a tiny granddaughter to hold etc. Try some volunteer work for a couple hours a week maybe. HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB !!~

I'm sorry to hear that. I had a hysterectomy when I was 25 years old. the lord did bless me with one child though. She is now 16 years old. she recently had an ovary removed also. I hope she can have children later on so we can have a grandbaby.

Yes Rose I have! My Special needs (Autistic son) is five now and he is all I have... We waited to see if he was going to talk etc. as he was very difficult to handle, especially the first three years of his life! He is now a loving, obedient child most of the time and verbal and so we are wanting to have another one...I am also thirty now and so my biological clock is ticking but we live in such a tiny apartment it is very necessary for us to find another place that is within our budget and in our son's school district (Very hard to do) I am getting a bit discouraged at this and yes, every time I see a baby I am like this! I'm praying one day soon we will find a new place to live and that will certainly be a start! ~Heavens~

We have been trying for more than 3 years and have not been blessed ... yet. We have decided to just let it go and if it happens, then YAY and if not, then that is OK too. I'm thinking with the health issues going on with my hubby, it could be another reason why we haven't been able to have another baby. I get clucky all the time when I see babies and even younger children than my son.

I know what you mean I had my tubes tied after my 2nd cause of my insides being turned i wasn't supose to have a child an I had 2 but the last one the delveiry was bad so while they had me cut open they asked my hubby how fixing her tubes now so she can't have nomore an hubby said he would rather have 2 kids with a mom then 3 without but i still wish I had one more

I'm not in your position and so have never felt like that but i can kind of understand why you would. But you have had your four children, who you obviously adore, and they must be a handful, it's probably not the case of wanting another child but just the option! I think it's only natural for women to feel maternal around young babies, i know when i see one i start to wonder what sort of mum i would be! You will get to be a grandmother at some point though and that will mean more newborn babies, but the bonus with that is that you can give them back when they cry or have a dirty nappy! I hope you're not feeling too down about it though, keep smiling! xxx

I know the feeling. Even though physically I am still able to have children, I am 48 and a single mom. I would love to have another baby, but I'm not sure at my age how my body would react to being pregnant. Besides, I have two that I have raised by myself and my youngest is almost ten now.I definitely do not want to raise anymore children by myself. It's too hard, especially with trying to work, go to school, and also be there for my children.

thank you for best response, I see my therapist degree is paying off lol

I know the feeling, but let me say something. I don't mean to hurt you by this, but just to make you feel better. Whenever your get that feeling, just think of the women who have never been able to conceive at all and never had what you have. Do you feel better now? You do have another choice. Why don't you adopt a newborn baby, if your husband is also willing. You will be giving a chance in life to a little one who has nobody. Just a suggestion. And pray to God to give you strength. There is a God up there who helps us overcome anything and everything.

[i]Hi gemini, Ohh..sorry to hear about that! I am not a mother yet but can feel how you feel! I haven't tried to experience that but I love kids really, I just don't see myself having kids, I do know maybe because I have never tried taking care of babies.. I have only one Sister and we were one year apart and I never tried having babies in the family! I always tell my Sister to have babies soon! LOL! ANyway, maybe time will come I will also feel the urge of desiring to have my own![/i]

This may sound harsh but please try not to take it that way, ok? Consider yourself very lucky to have children at all because there are so many people out there that can't. I'm one of them. I had to have a hysterectomy too a few years ago due to health problems but was suppose to have it done years before but I wanted to have children but couldn't concieve or afford to have the procedure done to help me so I had to give up. Don't feel sorry for me either because I know that God has other plans for my husband and I and I don't know what the plans are YET but eventually He'll reveal them to us.

I feel like this often. I wanted several children and because of an ovarian tumor, was only able to have the one. I wish often that I could, even now, afford to adopt or take one in. And it is a wanting and a needing feeling. I feel for you!!