Things Had To Be Sorted Out In My World
By Darkwing
@Darkwing (21583)
September 29, 2008 7:49am CST
Firstly, I must apologise to all my friends for my long absence from the community, but things have been so hectic here that I haven't had the time nor the inclination to spend a whole lot of time. I'm sorry if some of you were worried - I tried to drop e-mails wherever I could, to let you know that I was ok.
Remember what I told you all about my son being beaten and my granddaughter controlled by the boy she had been seeing? Well, things came to a head when I received a text from my son on the Monday evening, September 1st. Already, the previous weekend, she had texted her mum three times and told her that she wanted to come home but she was scared. The police had been around to her, and she hadn't taken the opportunity to leave with them. Then, on the Monday, I received the message from my son saying that she'd texted her friend and told her that she wanted to go home but she was scared... asking if her friend's mum would go pick her up from there? The mum wasn't willing so my granddaughter then texted again, and said that he was stopping her from going to sixth form college, because she was going to study law. The friend duly called my daughter-in-law, and my son texted me!
I saw red! She had studied hard all those years and passed her exams because she wanted to join the police force. She was due to register on Wednesday 3rd September and for me, this was the last straw. I had to get her out of there!!! I phoned a couple of young male friends in the village, who don't put up with any nonsense, and arranged for one of their partners to drive us all up to the house on the Tuesday night. Then, I phoned and left my granddaughter a message in the dead of night telling her to pack her stuff as I was going up there to take her out that evening. Tuesday night, and off we went. I went to the door alone and the guys stood the other side of the road. He answered the door but brought my granddaughter to talk... he doesn't know me, so I was probably the best one to go. She came out in her pyjamas and I had to talk quietly because he was listening out of the bedroom window. She was scared... said she can't just go because he'd go mad and she was afraid he might go back round to her father. I told her not to worry about that, and if she didn't want to go back in for her clothes, I would send the police round to collect them. She reasoned with me and I with her for about twenty minutes to half an hour, and finally, after a few hugs and tears, she walked. I had the guys standing by the door and at the top of the steps and we walked through them to the car with them following behind and him shouting out the window after her about wanting her stuff. I told her to close her ears, keep walking and to get in the car. As we got into the car, he came across with her stuff... only because her phone was in there and he wanted to pester her again, but one of my friends, put the bag in the boot and they sat either side of my granddaughter. I told Heidi to drive away as fast as she could before he attacked the car, which she did, bless her! Honestly!!! I felt like Ma Baker, but I couldn't sit aside any longer and watch my family fall apart. My daughter in law was a bag of nerves, my son dying inside and my little Lauren was really quiet and subdued because of what had happened in the previous three weeks. My granddaughter laughed as we drove her to freedom and when I asked her what she found so funny, she said it was exciting... like MI5!!! She also said she'd never seen him look so scared as he did that night! Maybe he's not as big as he liked to make out, huh? Tears and hugs were repeated when I got her back home, and it was only then I found out that he hadn't even let her wear her make up... I had remarked on how pale she looked and how she had dark marks under her eyes. What a sorry state to get into... I'm so glad I did what I did before it got any worse.
My granddaughter duly registered at sixth form college, passed her entrance exams, and is now one of a class of six pupils studying for her A levels in law. Moreover, she has been invited on a five-day trip to New York with the college, where she will visit the World Trade Centre, the Statue of Liberty and ice skate in Central Park. Costly, but she has money saved and is contributing towards it. She's really excited and loving her studies. So... all is well there, that ends well. She'll be off to New York next April!
The court case takes place on Wednesday. My son and daughter-in-law are dreading this, but let's just hope now that justice will be done. At least the family are back together and she's reiterated to him that it's all over!
To make this a discussion... if you have read my previous discussions about how this guy hit my granddaughter and then beat up on my son, what are your views about how the court hearing might go? He's sixteen now, so in juvenile court, but he pleaded "not guilty" at the first hearing. My granddaughter never made a statement because she was scared of him and other witnesses were afraid for their own children, so although they saw what happened, will not give evidence in court. I just hope now, for my son and daughter-in-law's sakes that he is penalised so that they can carry on their lives as they used to.
Great to be back... I'll be around a little more now. xx
3 people like this
11 responses
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
30 Sep 08
WELCOME BACK!
I knew you had a handful to do or you would have been here so I wasnt worried just knew you would get things done and ya did!
Congrats on getting her back and ya did the right thing!.
I just dont know why ya didnt do it before.
Hopefully that all that can will testify for her and not him.
He should really be locked up for a long time till he gets it through his head this just isnt the way to do things.
Only 16 what a darn bully!
Be sure he will get his .
Karma can go to work here for sure
HUgs and blessing to all
1 person likes this
@Lakota12 (42600)
• United States
30 Sep 08
I can just see that friend doing that. and I was wondering why no one else did it but they were all probably over age so couldnt hit a minor!.
Still beleive KArma will move in . But if he does get away with it I just in hopes he dont come back and try any thing about it . Not beat up your son again!
CAn you get e restraining order against him now!?
@Darkwing (21583)
•
30 Sep 08
Thank you, my dear friend. I think you're right... I should have perhaps moved before that, but I had to think it all out properly as to how I was going to go about it, and get backup, just in case. I got to the stage where I had watched my family drop to rock-bottom, and when he said she was NOT going to sixth form college, everything kicked off in my head. That was the last straw, as they say!
As for the court case, I'm not sure which way it goes. He pleaded "not guilty" before, which is why it has been reset. Maybe he'll change his plea... I don't know, but as he's a juvenile offender, one never knows what the outcome might be. Still, as you say, Karma will go to work, and he will get his come-uppance sometime.
An old school-friend of my deceased grandson was so incensed when he heard what had happened to both my son and granddaughter, that he went and gave him a clout, for his trouble. I guess he thought he'd step into Daniel's shoes for the moment, or maybe even Daniel asked him to do that small thing for him! lol. I applaud the kid... but, I hope that the story isn't twisted into my son and daughter-in-law asking him to do it, for that would look really bad in court.
Fingers crossed now... the time is almost here. Brightest Blessings my dear friend and thank you for your contribution. x
1 person likes this
@Darkwing (21583)
•
30 Sep 08
He's already under restraint. He's not allowed near the family or home, but that doesn't seem to be a big deal to him. We didn't choose the violent way ourselves because the court case was looming. If my son got involved or knew of anybody else who got involved with hitting him, then it might have changed the case. Not only that.. I don't agree with fighting violence with violence. My wisdom can help me talk my way through it, as I did with Sarah. lol.
@teapotmommommerced (10359)
• United States
30 Sep 08
OMG darkwing I am glad you are fine and you got your granddaughter out of that mess. I am so sorry to hear she got messed up with that creep in the first place.
I hope they treat him as an adult and prosecute to the full extent of the law. He needs some jail time and counseling lots and lots of counseling. I am wondering if they don't treat him like an adult because he is living on his own like an adult.
I hope your granddaughter has learned her lesson and does not get cought up in anyone like that again.
Pat yourself on the back and thank god for good friends with cars and big guys who are not afraid of 16 year olds.
@Darkwing (21583)
•
30 Sep 08
He's not living on his own. He has no job, was thrown out of school and takes money from his ex-girlfriend. More fool her!!! He's living with a mutual friend of his and my granddaughter and his Mum, sharing a bedroom with his friend.
The court case is at 10 a.m. tomorrow and I've asked my son to let me know the outcome as soon as it's over. I'm praying that he gets detained for a long time, and yes, he needs a lot of counselling to sort out his head.
He he ... my name is Pat, so to pat myself on the back sounds strange! Sorry... I was amused by that remark! Brightest Blessings my friend, and thank you for your contribution. I will let you all know the outcome of the hearing tomorrow.
1 person likes this
@Darkwing (21583)
•
1 Oct 08
Hello again, my friend! The court hearing is over but a verdict may take up to three days to reach. I have no idea whether this country's legal system thinks out of its head or it's rear! What's the World coming too, my friend? Anyway, they'll let my son and DIL know as soon as they reach a verdict, so we'll just have to hang on that little bit longer. I have my doubts as to whether they'll punish him severely enough though.
1 person likes this
@teapotmommommerced (10359)
• United States
1 Oct 08
Boy it is late over there. You need to sleep soon because it is almost tomorrow already.
He does not live with his parents so in my book he is living like an adult.
Good luck to all involved.
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
11 Oct 08
My dear friend...Hooray! This is good news and I'm sure you've all been through the ringer. It's a shame your granddaughter put herself and her family through all that but it's over now and she is safe and getting on with things.. I'm glad you went in and took her out of that situation. Good for you!
1 person likes this
@Darkwing (21583)
•
13 Oct 08
Thank you, my dear friend. Now the court case is over, he's getting a bit lairy again, but I think she's kicked him well into touch now. A further piece of good news is that she's secured a part-time job, on Thursday evenings and Saturday afternoons, four hours each day, at New Look. New Look is a youngsters' fashion shop, and she's over the moon. I told her "See what you can do without him? You would never have been allowed, or have had the confidence to get that job if you were still around him." She agreed. lol.
Brightest Blessings, my dear friend and thank you for your contribution. x
@kayrod2 (1304)
• Australia
30 Sep 08
what fantastic news, darkwing. i am so glad things are looking up. it is hard to say how things will go in court. i so hope justice is served so the family will get back to normality.will your granddaughter be able to give evidence now? if so it will be of help. but he needs to be locked up. i will be thinking of you all while this goes to court, you can be sure of that. he is bad news and i am sure the courts will see that.
best wishes to you and your family, and great to see you back
xxxxx
@Darkwing (21583)
•
1 Oct 08
Yes, it does serve him right. Well, the court case is over now. My DIL got a little bit frustrated... angry even at some of the questions she was being asked by the defence, but it's over. The problem is, the verdict can take up to three days!!! What the heck is this country coming to... I ask you? They will, however, let my son and DIL know as soon as a verdict is reached, so still praying!
Yes, neat, the bashing, huh? he he he. xx
1 person likes this
@Darkwing (21583)
•
30 Sep 08
Yes, it's great that it's over now, my dear friend. My granddaughter won't be giving evidence, as her parents don't want her to be in court. They would rather she stayed well clear of him and went to college as normal. If she decides she wants to make a statement then they won't stop her, but neither do they want to push her.
If he is sent to a detention centre or punished severely enough for his crime, then my son and daughter in law will be able to put this behing them, but if not, they will continue to fear leaving the house alone, I'm sure. He has already suffered the wrath of an old school friend of my deceased grandson. My granddaughter was invited to a friend's party a couple of weekends ago, but wouldn't go because she knew he would be going. Well, apparently, this ex-school friend of my grandson's had heard about what happened to my son and granddaughter, adopted Daniel's "big brother" attitude and beat the kiddie up on his way to the party! lol. We had no knowledge of his intentions, but I guess, like me, he had his deceased best friend's sister and Dad in mind, and did what he had to do. Now, all we need is a fair sentence at the court case, and we can all get back to normal before Christmas. It's my birthday on Friday, so I couldn't wish for a better birthday present than to see him convicted.
Brightest Blessings, my dear friend, and thank you for your contribution. x
1 person likes this
@kayrod2 (1304)
• Australia
1 Oct 08
Yes, it's great that it's over now, my dear friend. My granddaughter won't be giving evidence, as her parents don't want her to be in court. They would rather she stayed well clear of him and went to college as normal. If she decides she wants to make a statement then they won't stop her, but neither do they want to push her.
If he is sent to a detention centre or punished severely enough for his crime, then my son and daughter in law will be able to put this behing them, but if not, they will continue to fear leaving the house alone, I'm sure. He has already suffered the wrath of an old school friend of my deceased grandson. My granddaughter was invited to a friend's party a couple of weekends ago, but wouldn't go because she knew he would be going. Well, apparently, this ex-school friend of my grandson's had heard about what happened to my son and granddaughter, adopted Daniel's "big brother" attitude and beat the kiddie up on his way to the party! lol. We had no knowledge of his intentions, but I guess, like me, he had his deceased best friend's sister and Dad in mind, and did what he had to do. Now, all we need is a fair sentence at the court case, and we can all get back to normal before Christmas. It's my birthday on Friday, so I couldn't wish for a better birthday present than to see him convicted.
Brightest Blessings, my dear friend, and thank you for your contribution. x
i couldnt help but have a smile on my face when i read he got beat up. serves him right. i can certainly understand them not wanting to have her in court. i am hoping he gets punished accordingly.
best wishes
1 person likes this
@FaerieAne2003 (679)
• United States
30 Sep 08
Oh, wow. I was reading this and thinking "How many other women has this guy done this to? How old is he, and how old is she? Is he so much older than she that he thinks he has the 'right' to control her? Is she so young that she thinks she can't fight back?" And then you wrote that he's ONLY SIXTEEN?! OMG, you're kidding! And he beat up a grown man, too?! WTF?! That sounds totally insane to me. I live in America, so I don't understand much of British law, but still. Why was your granddaughter living with this creep, and where were his parents? Is 16 the legal age there? It's 18 here, which seems much more "grown up" to me. At 16, you're still trying out your wings and learning to fly, but you still need plenty of parental guidance. But he's only 16...so wasn't there more that could have been done a lot sooner? And if 16 is the legal age of accountability there, then why is he being tried in juvenile court? So, enough knocking Brit law for now. I don't think I'll ever understand it anyway.
I'm SO GLAD that your granddaughter is safe! I know how horrible it is to think you have no hope, and to live in constant fear. Like I said, I don't know about over there, but here your son and granddaughter would have an EXCELLENT case against this guy, and would most likely WIN WIN WIN!!! I know that nothing will ever be quite the same, but now your granddaughter has an excellent learning experience under her belt, and I doubt she's likely to make the same mistake again. I hope she's able to conquer herself in this battle, that's the only way she'll be able to move on and learn. She's got great potential from the sound of things, and I'm sure she's going to succeed in whatever she tries. I hope things work out the best for all of your family, and I hope the little cretin spends a chunk of time in jail, therapy, and money to make amends and move himself forward as well. He is just 16, so he's still got a chance to change, too. Here's hoping for the best for everyone, especially for your son and granddaughter.
1 person likes this
@omar0913 (942)
• Legaspi, Philippines
29 Sep 08
God is good, For such a wonderful person like you Darkwing your such a brave old man, I do hope that I can act like what you did to protect my family in those kinds of delima. It's so nice to have you back here in myLot, I've been very busy this past previous month that I have'nt got any spare time to visit our most beloved site (myLot) because of my work. But when I checked my E-mail I saw a message from myLot that you have posted a discussion I got too excited to read it. As I'm reading your posted discussion, I was thinking where did you got those courage, thats why I did not wait for my spare time to answer that discussion of yours, bravo!!! take good care of your self always, again, nice to have you back here. I hope things will go well for your family.
1 person likes this
Just thought I'd set the record straight... thank you for your continued support. You're a true friend, Omar.
@winterose (39887)
• Canada
29 Sep 08
oh my what a story and thank you so much for sharing it with us. You are ma barker and good for you. You did the right thing, somebody had to help that poor child. Now about the law, I do not know, each country has different laws,
here in quebec, he probably would not have gotten much of a sentence, especially if it was a first time offense, being that he is a minor. He probably would have gotten community work or probation nothing much. I hear in England the laws are tougher.
1 person likes this
@craftcatcher (3699)
• United States
30 Sep 08
*whistles* *applause* Way ta go sweety!! Dang woman you remind me... of me!
I don't take kindly to people messing with my family either.
I am so glad you're back and I am thrilled that your granddaughter is out of that horrible situation and on her way to a better life. I can't imagine how relieved you all must be after all the stress and upset.
I have a feeling that karma is going to come back and bite that boy on his behind, one way or another, and he will get what he deserves.
Welcome back my friend, you were sorely missed.
I don't take kindly to people messing with my family either.
I am so glad you're back and I am thrilled that your granddaughter is out of that horrible situation and on her way to a better life. I can't imagine how relieved you all must be after all the stress and upset.
I have a feeling that karma is going to come back and bite that boy on his behind, one way or another, and he will get what he deserves.
Welcome back my friend, you were sorely missed. 
@littleowl (7157)
•
30 Sep 08
Hi my dear friend..I think you know how I think my views are the way this guy will be penalised in court..in my case even I had no witnesses but my ex would of gone to jail had I not pulled back at the last minute..this guy young though he may be will get his just rewards without a doubt...also if your grandaughter has a good lawyer that will help too..but he will be punished.
Its great to have you back you have been in my thoughts and prayers..Brightest Blessings littleowl
you have been in my thoughts and prayers..Brightest Blessings littleowl@Darkwing (21583)
•
30 Sep 08
Thank you dear friend... really though, it was the knowledge of your help and that of the other special person who contacted me just a couple of hours before I left which gave me the strength and determination to carry this through. I'll always be grateful to you both. xx
@littleowl (7157)
•
30 Sep 08
You always are my friend and may you be rwarded a thousand times fold for your brave actions and the happiness you have brought not only you but your family and grandaughter it is so lovely to hear how well she is doing now...Brightest Blessings littleowl
1 person likes this
@tamarafireheart (15384)
•
29 Sep 08
Hi DarkWing,
Wlecome back, yes we were all worried but I knew were having problems, phew! thank goodness it all over for a while and your granddaughter is ok, but that young should be taught a lesson by the law as he will do it again maybe to another girl, as long as you granddaughter is well and truely stay away from him, good for her and having ma Baker for grandma is great.
Bright Blessings.
Tamara
1 person likes this
@Darkwing (21583)
•
30 Sep 08
Thank you, my friend. I'm glad to be back and although the court case is looming over us, I hope that justice will be done. My granddaughter said I was the best person to go round there and get her out and she has shown her appreciation by sticking with the family. Ma Baker was a tyrant but I don't mind taking her name in this instance!
Brightest Blessings and thank you for your contribution, my dear friend. xx
