My In Laws Hate Me

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I have been married to my husband for 26 yrs. My in-laws still hate me because they have this thing about who is blood and who is not. I have been married before and have children from my other marriage. Our first real beef was about the fact that they would never accept my children as being one whole family. They would send Christmas gifts to only the sons I had by my husband and that's where all the fighting began. When I had another small child who was only 4 yrs old he would wonder why Santa sent his two brothers gifts through the mail and not him. I have raised foster children also and one has acutally lived his life with us. He is now 29 years old and we are his family. I never speak of half brothers or step brothers, etc. My sons are my sons no matter who's blood is running through their vains. My husband has always taken his families side in everything and when I speak up I am always the one who is wrong. Recently this past Christmas he told me the only family that is his was our two sons and his birth family. This hurt me so bad and was the cause of some major problems. He hit me with all this on Christmas eve and then he was supposed to go in the hospital the day after Christmas. After years of taking care of him for his numerous medical conditions I finally decided this time I would not be present 24/7 during his hospital stay. My nerves were shot and I eventually had to leave my home and go stay somewhere else because his family was sending me nasty emails and phone calls of how I was this horrible person. I bit my tongue and never fought back this time. To top it off they all lived as close as I was to him and not a single one has ever come to help me with him or visit him in the hospital even when he was having open heart surgery. However this time the surgery was not serious and I felt that he should see who would step in my place and take care of him if I wasn't around. He was planning on moving away to a mountain which is pretty far from us. I told him if he did, then I would not be there with him because I want to be with my FAMILY (meaning my children and grandson). They condem me because I wasn't there for the less serious surgery after Christmas yet none of them would come down to help him. This man has had about 30 surgeries in his life and I have packed his chest that was laid wide open due to the hernia he had. I done things that I could never have done before for him. Then when he is finished with me taking care of him, he tells me he never asked me to do so or he didn't need me to take care of him. He then takes his families side in all they say and do. I was never good enough for him or his family simply because I was not blood related. What would you have done if this happened to you on Christmas eve and how would you feel if your husband told you that you weren't family, along with the other children? What would you do if your husband's family is always attacking you and he takes their side? Would you be there for him?