All the stress I'm under is really tearing me up

I use to manage depression, listening musiq, playing violen and i like chocolates, and i feel i get refreshed after having my chocolates. And best remedy is Meditation, try breathing exercise, it will help you balance and handle depression.

Sounds like you have a really tough situation in your house. In my opinion your granddaughter and your boyfriend are the problem that causes you to stress. Maybe your boyfriend is right in some way but like you said he is always drunk and high plus he don’t want you to be close to anyone. Your relationship is not healthy. You should get some help or try to talk to him. Better yet, talk to both of your granddaughter and to your boyfriend to work things out. If things don’t work, you have to get rid either your boyfriend or your granddaughter. Your stress would prolong if you don’t take action. Leaving your toxic environment for awhile would help you to relax and decide the things you have to do.

It sounds like to me that you need to leave or get rid of him. No one has the right to control another person by saying who they can talk to and who they can't. I hope that he doesn't fight with you in front of your grandkids as that can really mess with a kids' mind and they don't need that. If he is drinking and getting high, he needs help!

Check out a local womens cnter sweetie and get some help for yourself. It sounds like you really need it. I know what it is to live with constant stress. I think that you will be able to get the support you need if you contact a center and ask for supportive therapy. You should not leave the house. Unless you feel he will get violent. Consult an attorney.