I watched my friend die today..... :(
By NrgDfenZ
@NrgDfenZ (1810)
Belgium
October 3, 2008 12:40pm CST
Hi all
I don't know if you really care, but I just have to talk about this..
It helps me if I can talk about my feelings..
Especially now..
Today a friend of me had an accident with his car.. I was in school when they called me and told me. Without a doubt I jumped up and ran out of the class. Teachers were mad, but I don't care..
The person who called me was waiting in front of school, so I ran to his car and we went as fast as possible to the hospital..
Once there they brought us to his room, all kinds of things were stuck on him, a really horrible sight.. I thought it only happened on tv, but I guess it doesn't..
After a moment of silence, I sat down and started talking to him. I don't know why, but I think he could hear me.. At least I hope he could..
Suddenly a machine made a beep.. His heart had stopped....
Nurses running in, doctors also..
They took me outside.. After a moment they came out of the room.. And I knew what he wanted to say.. He looked at me, and then looked at the floor, that was all I had to know..
He died.. In front of me..
Yesterday I went out with him, and we had lots of fun and laughed all evening..
Yesterday when he left to go home, he said these exact words: "Be nice to all"..
Those were his last words against me....
Now I don't know what to do.. I can just sit down and start crying, but I know he wouldn't want that.. I want to remember his the way he was last night, but I keep getting that picture in my head with him lying there with all those things on his body...
Well thanks for reading anyway..
I just had to say this, thanks :)
17 people like this
54 responses
@Chevee (5905)
• United States
3 Oct 08
I am sorry about your friend, I know it is easy to say, but just remember your friend through the good times. Remember how you spent that last day with your friend having fun and enjoying your friend's company. You will miss your friend but don't let that get you down you will not gain anything and your friend wouldn't want you to do that. Everything happen for a reason and it was your friends time to go. Your friend said good bye to you he heard your voice you were there for your friend. I am sure your friend left this world knowing you cared. Your friend waited until you got there before he passed that was a sign that he cared to and that you gave your him permission to pass on into the after life.
God bless you and your friend.
@owlwings (43910)
• Cambridge, England
3 Oct 08
You should cry all you want ... let it all come out but don't blame yourself for being lees than you think you should have been. You gave what you had for him and once people understand that you had to be there, it will be fine.
You know, three people die every second in this world. So few of them have a friend as caring as you to be with them when they go. Your friend was one of the lucky ones.
Nothing will bring him back. That is incredibly sad for you but that is the way it is. You, however, are still there to bring him forward ... to remember what was worthwhile in him and to live that ... to make the memory of him shine in whatever you do and how you live from now on.
It hurts - terribly - but that is how you must be because you knew him. Your life will always now contain everything of the best you could possibly wish that his did.
God bless you.
1 person likes this
@owlwings (43910)
• Cambridge, England
3 Oct 08
"Be nice to all" is one way of putting it. "Love those who deserve it with all your heart and be generous, at least, to those whose worthiness is not yours to know." is another.
Your life is ahead of you. All that you found good in him is part of that and can't be denied.
@jonesy123 (3948)
• United States
3 Oct 08
I'm sorry for your loss. This is so tragic. It is difficult to come to terms with what happened. Just hold on to the good memories. Btw, it is okay to cry.
Maybe it'll help if you and your friends would plan a memorial service together with his family. It helps to do something positive. If that is not possible try and do something else to keep his memory alive like creating a website for people to visit and remember him.
I know it sounds cliche right now but eventually you'll be able to move on and think about your friend without feeling terrible. Take comfort in the fact that you were there for him at the end. I'm sure that was important for him not to be alone in that environment.
Take care and don't forget, it is okay to grieve.
1 person likes this
@owlwings (43910)
• Cambridge, England
3 Oct 08
Yes, you will do something special ... for him but also for yourself!
@ms1323 (259)
• United States
3 Oct 08
I think he would understand if you did just sit down and cry...for a while. It is perfectly normal to grieve for him, and for your loss of friendship. Your last picture of him will stay with you for a while, but it will eventually give way to the happier times. Do him the honor of being true to his last words spoken to you, and what fabulous last words they were. It says a lot about his character.
1 person likes this
@gracetreyes (529)
• Philippines
3 Oct 08
sorry to hear that.how old is your friend?the way i see it his too young to die.But we cannot do anything about it either.God has a purpose for everything under the sun.I will pray for you and your friends family, that God comforts you and his family in this trying times.May your friend rest in peace.My condolences...
1 person likes this
@annjilena (5618)
• United States
4 Oct 08
iam sorry you lost your friend he will be missed remember the good times you and he had together he don,t have to worry no more about anything under the sun his spirit goes back to god his sins are forgiven.
@sudalunts (5523)
• United States
4 Oct 08
Please accept my condolences. I am sure he knew before he passed on that you were a true friend. It is so hard I am sure to lose someone that was so dear to you. You started your discussion with: "I don't know if you really care". Don't feel that way, there are many people who care, even though they may not know you personally. I care, because I can feel your pain through your writing. It will get better for you, say a prayer for your friend's soul, and always cherish the memories you have of him
I wish you strength as you go through these trying times, I wish you peace, that you accept what has happened, and know that you were there for him.
Take care
1 person likes this
@sanjo0679 (225)
• United States
4 Oct 08
I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your friend. He sounds as if he was a great, fun person and an important part of your life. I can only imagine how devastated you must be. Watching a loved one die is something you never forget. As time goes on, your pain will lessen. Remembering the good times you shared will help you through this trying time. Even though he's no longer with you, he will always be in your thoughts and heart.
1 person likes this
@tangledinbarbwire (76)
• United States
4 Oct 08
When you got the call i know you were wondering how bad it was. You never know maybe he wanted you there when he passed cuz your friendship was so strong that he held on till you got there. I think god works in mysterious ways. I have been where you are and i know how you feel. Just keep the thought in your head that someday you will see him, and know he is in a better place. I am sorry for your lose.
1 person likes this
@vanities (11395)
• Davao, Philippines
7 Oct 08
that was a tragic one for you!!seeing your friend die really hurts...all you can do is pray for him that he may rest in peace and be with the Lord above...i guess time will heal all bad memories and the incident as well..grieve today and tomorrow just move on for another day..theres so much instore for you in the near future...
@ahgong (10064)
• Singapore
4 Dec 08
Sorry to hear of your loss.
IT has been three months since you posted this discussion. I hope you have gotten past his passing.
A person never really leaves us if we keep his legacy alive by keeping his memories alive.
The best quote I can offer is from the movie Phenomenone.
John Travolta said this in character...
"Now if we set this apple down it would become spoiled within a few days. But if we take a bite of it like this...it becomes part of us forever, and we can take it with us."
~ George Malley
Be happy and grateful in the fact that he was a part of your life. And you shared a part of yours in his.
@shell94 (990)
• Canada
3 Oct 08
I am so sorry to hear about your loss! It's horrible that you have the memory of the hospital lingering in your mind. All i know is that time will help things get easier.
Have you tried to write a letter or a poem to him...open your heart and soul and spill, everything and anything you want or have wanted to say to him. I have done this and had the letter sealed in the coffin with the person I lost...I found it relieving to let things out...
There is nothing wrong with crying...it is a natural part of the grieving process and means that you are not in denial about the passing of your friend...in exxence its a good thing. Your friend would want you to go on with your life and be happy. well you need to grieve first to be able to go on....
I think you need to remember the words he spoke the night before to you...make his memory proud and live by them and "be nice to all" as he would want you too.
My heart goes out to you as the loss of someone close is the hardest thing in the world to deal with....but you are strong, and you will make it through. The next few days will be extremely hard for you, surround yourself with friends and family and remember the fun times you had together, the goals and dreams you shared. This will all help you...I know you find that hard to believe, but please try to trust me with this and someday maybe you will be able to say, Hey that chick on mylot was right!!!
All the best to you and my thoughts are with you at this difficult time!
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
3 Oct 08
i'm so sorry about your friend, bless his heart. try to think about the good times, the fun times y'all had & try not to think of him the way he was in the hospital. time will help.take care.
@msedge (4011)
• United States
23 Dec 08
I feel for you.I lost my love ones and i know how hurt that is.I know its been three months.I hope you had recovered from sadness now.Remember if you lose one, there must be one coming in for you.