Should teen mothers be forced ( by their parents) to give up their baby?
By Newmommy2006
@Newmommy2006 (71)
United States
November 6, 2006 2:25pm CST
I know of a girl that this happened to. I don't agree with it at all. She was 15 and wound up pregnant. Her parents made her give the baby up for adoption. She is now about 30 and really wants to have a family but is unable to for some reason. Her and her husband are looking into adoption, but her husband is pretty much against adopting ( almost to the point of not doing it) he wants "his own" baby.She gets pictures and letters from her daugters adoptive parents, but I think that this makes it harder for her! I think her parents were very wrong to make her give up her baby!
4 people like this
17 responses
@Polly1 (12645)
• United States
6 Nov 06
That is so very wrong. No one should ever make someone no matter what the age to give her baby away. That should be a decision left to the mother of the child. The girls parents should try to support her in her decision. She is the one that has to live with it. When we choose to bring children into this world it is our responsibility to be there for them. Even when the disappoint us or do wrong.
1 person likes this
@Newmommy2006 (71)
• United States
6 Nov 06
You are so right! This is what I have been saying through this whole conversation! It is our job to tech our children how to be the best "people/parents" that they can be! Come what may!! We can't just "give up" when things get a little tough!
@Raissa1967 (801)
• Netherlands
6 Nov 06
No I don't think so. I should say it depence on the situation. Wat seems falls now can be right in the future. But the most important thing is what the young mother herself wants. When she wants to go for it let her.
1 person likes this
@Newmommy2006 (71)
• United States
6 Nov 06
I don't think that the mother should even be given the option. I think that she needs to "own up" to what she has done and accept responsibility for her actions.
@flowerchilde (12529)
• United States
6 Nov 06
No. I would never do this to a child of mine! It's just too big of a decision to make for her.. Why would someone do this? Maybe couldn't be bothered with the extra work and responsibilty.. Unless they were way*way) poor.. but even the I couldn't do it!
@flowerchilde (12529)
• United States
6 Nov 06
..but at least the kid's alive..!
1 person likes this
@Newmommy2006 (71)
• United States
6 Nov 06
Agreed! I guess we never really brought the father into play here. I hate to say it but, Most young men (heck, men in general. lol) are way to immature and will want to just "get out"! Don't get me wrong, there are the exceptions!
@stru9559 (633)
• United States
6 Nov 06
I don't think a mother should be forced to give up their baby - a parent that does that will not only lose their grandchild but their daughter as well as it would be natural for the daughter to end up resenting her parents for forcing her into that decision.
@Newmommy2006 (71)
• United States
6 Nov 06
Yes, I can see how this would ruin a parents/daughter relationship forever. Or at the very least, drastically change it. The other sad thing is, I'm sure that the girl would more than likely go do it again! She didn't learn anything except that "problems can be gotten out of".
@sarah22 (3979)
• United States
6 Nov 06
No, i dont think that its fare to ask it of them to do that. If they can show they are able to look after the child then they desurve a chance. But i would not like to see the child get hurt becasue the mother wanted the child and then decided along the ways she did not want it any more. They are just as innocent as the mother and they both desurve a great life and a chance.
1 person likes this
@Newmommy2006 (71)
• United States
6 Nov 06
You know I guess I kinda agree with you. It is a decision that BOTH the parents and the daughter need to sit down and make TOGETHER. I agree that what is best for the baby should be the thing that is done. Forcing the mom to keep the baby would be just as bad as forcing her to give it up!
@loved1 (5328)
• United States
6 Nov 06
I actually know several girls who had babies at 15 years old and turned out to be responsible and loving parents. They had the support of their friends and family to guide them! I know that in at least one case the mother considered giving her son up for adoption and she is very thankful she chose to keep her baby. I think if my teenage daughter had a baby it would be the best thing for her to keep the baby and raise it herself. (With the support of the adults in her life) How else are children going to learn that actions have concequences?
@Newmommy2006 (71)
• United States
6 Nov 06
I soooo agree with you! I think that it would be very difficult or immpossible for the teen to do it on her own, but if she had the love and support of her family there is no reason she couldn't raise a happy healthy baby. I think that that is just another part of us becoming parents ourselves. I think that is one of our responsibilities as parents. If my daughter was to become pregnant during her teen years I think it would be MY responsibility to teach her and help her and yes also make HER take responsibility for HER actions. I believe that giving the baby up only teaches your daughter that when she gets herself into trouble, she needs to take the "quick" way out!
@sillygirlsd (959)
• United States
7 Nov 06
I think It's horrible what the parents did. But then again I wasn't in their shoes. I could understand them doing that if they weren't able to support one more person. The girl having the baby at 15 in most cases wouldn't be able to provide for her child so her parents would be the ones responsible for the baby. I think her husband is wrong for not wanting to adopt. Ever child needs a family. I'm sure that luck will turn her way! She sounds like a real caring and loving person! I wish her the best!
@PiNkKiSsEs023 (594)
• United States
6 Nov 06
i think that is just wrong. the girl should be able to decide if she wants to keep her child or not!
1 person likes this
@sharon_1958 (823)
• United States
7 Nov 06
yes if they are not responsible enough to take care of it
@suzieque (2334)
• Canada
7 Nov 06
No, I don't think they should be forced to give up their baby!! There's a lot of people that are great parents and had their kids when they were teenagers. I knew this girl that even went to university and had her kids when she was a teenager.
@pumpkinjam (8767)
• United Kingdom
6 Nov 06
No, I don't think they should. One good thing I can say about your friends parents is that they didn't choose for her to abort the child. But it makes no difference what age you have a baby, it's still yours and no-one should be able to tell you what to do (unless of course they think the baby is in danger or something)
It's really thoughtless of her husband though. I'm sure he would love to have his own baby but I would imagine that makse everything so much harder for your friend, knowing she already has a natural child she can't see and a pushy husband who expects her to produce another when she can't.
