I can never seem to relax - can anyone help?

Oxford, England
October 5, 2008 4:36am CST
Many of us suffer from it ... the inability to shut down and relax. Others find it easy. My own predicament is that I am always 'on duty' with any work that I do. I cannot shut that voice in my head up - it keeps on talking, all the time. I would love to be able to get home, then completely forget about commitments for the following day. I know a good many people who can do this at will, and I envy them. If you are one of those people who can just 'switch off', how do you do it?
1 person likes this
14 responses
@shalk_man (188)
• Morocco
6 Oct 08
I think you should concern other matters to be able to get rid of this situation Try to forget it and engaged in some hobbies and I think you will improve the future
• Oxford, England
6 Oct 08
Thank you for your response. GTG
• Morocco
14 Oct 08
Thank you for your subject !! very helpfull and usefull too thanks again I will do my best !! For sharing !!
1 person likes this
• Malaysia
5 Oct 08
For me, if that happened because of work, then i will go to washroom. Because i believe no one will stop me go to washroom and natural call. Also, during the moment at washroom, it allows me not only relax but to prepare on how to solve the situation or provide solutions. Somehow it is just a temporary method, but is better then nothing. Just a note, make sure the washroom or toilet is clean enough though, else it will become another pressure for us just to be there.
• Oxford, England
5 Oct 08
Thanks Adriantys, Unfortunately for us English, almost all public washrooms are utterly disgusting and filthy, but I take your point. Thanks for comment, GTG
• Malaysia
8 Oct 08
Hi GranTurismoGuru, glad that able to share some ideas to you.
• Philippines
6 Oct 08
Hey there! Why don't you go out with your family. Take a vacation leave and have some rest. Take a time out. take a breather. Why don't you try yoga, it's good. You can relax your mind and it makes your body in good condition. That's what I do, A little bit of yoga everyday relaxes my mind and body.
• Oxford, England
6 Oct 08
I've never tried yoga, or anything similar - perhaps I should! Thanks for comment, GTG
• China
6 Oct 08
to be honest ,it is hard for everyone to get out of their job completely ,but i think i can do this easily ,at first i want to introduce myself to you ,i am a chinese and i am a student now ,you may know that students also have stress ,in particular in our country .in the last ,i found a way to relax myself ,that is ,when i feel tension ,i will not think about my study again and i will play some computer games or listen to light music ,by this way ,i find it is helpful to myself ,i hope you also can try it .good luck my friend.
• Oxford, England
6 Oct 08
Thank you for your response. I have great empathy for students - I am from Oxford. GTG
@iman3004 (123)
6 Oct 08
basically, i am also like you.. it's hard for me to relax.. that's why, when i go home, i am watching tv or talking to my friend or family so i can make myself relax
• Oxford, England
6 Oct 08
Thank you for your comment, GTG
• Singapore
6 Oct 08
What i would do is smile!smiling Just keep smiling and u can switch it off Itz Easy Take it easy
• Oxford, England
6 Oct 08
I love your attitude. I am a smiley, happy person by nature, but it won't silence the constant dialogue going on in my mind - I wish it would shut up for a while, but they do say that none of us can actually STOP thinking. Thanks for your response, GTG
@deserve40 (1656)
• India
5 Oct 08
We are human and every individual has got different type of mind. I think that your problem is not very uncommon. Many people now a days have this sort of problem. I think that you should try these things: 1. Check if you are overburdened with work. In that case you are overworking yourself and that plays on your mind even when you are at home. 2. Plan your working in such a way that you finish it well in advance. Sometimes the pressure of completing some work in short period keeps in our mind even at home and so we are unable to relax. 3. Find out the things you like to do very much so that you get involved in those things forgetting about your work and that is another way of relaxing. Change of work is one sort of relaxing. 4. Try to learn "Pranayama" this is simple . Just sit at a corner of your room and try to concentrate in your breating. Try to do regular breathing and that will make you feel relaxed.
• Oxford, England
5 Oct 08
Excellent advice! Hey, you don't fancy being my Fitness Guru do you? Thank you for your comment, GTG
@leenie50 (3992)
• United States
5 Oct 08
Hey GT, What happened to us? Did someone drop our friendship off the board? Thanks for noticing. I kind of stepped away from mylot for a couple days to catch up on other things and I didn't realize I hadn't heard from you. Glad we're back. As for your question. I find that I am easily able to turn off the day by laying back and reading a good mystery thriller. My favorite. My husband is more like you. He doesn't like to read anything but non-fiction. The problem there is that it sometimes makes him more stressed if he is reading about politics. But he really likes to read the history of our country and biographies of the Presidents. Very interesting I'm sure but I love a good mystery. I also will rub his back to help him relax. If you have that option, try it. I really can't think of anything else to help divert your thinking into relaxation mode. leenie
• Oxford, England
5 Oct 08
Hello my dear, hope you are well, Yes, a good book does wonders for me too. But the problem I have is not wanting to pick up a book because I'm never in the mood when a book would be useful - a 'catch 22' situation. I never was wired up right! Thank you for your words as always, GT
• United Kingdom
5 Oct 08
This is quite a difficult thing to do I think but there are a number of things that you can try. You can practise meditation! You can sit in a comfortable chair for about half hour and listen to very relaxing music and this should take your mind off other matters for a while. I do practise this myself and it helps a lot. I think that those meditation tapes are terrific and you should always have one handy that you can just stick on whenever you need to relax. Don't forget the hot brew whilst you have your eyes closed. Also, you can try soaking your feet as well! Andrew
@belk89 (1103)
• Philippines
5 Oct 08
Well sometimes pressure at work can make a person experience anxiety. Sometimes to relax is already hard to do since you have lots of things in your mind that you wanted to get done soon. One thing i can advise you would be just dont take things too seriously. No matter what we do we can never avoid it so a time to enjoy and relax is good for you. Give yourself a chance to enjoy things that youve always wanted to do without worrying things. For sure it will make you feel better once you did that.
• Oxford, England
6 Oct 08
Thanks Belk, I take on board your words about taking things too seriously. Good stuff - thanks. GTG
@glords (2614)
• United States
5 Oct 08
Now that I'm a stay at home mother I feel the same way. I can't turn it off. I try to get in bed for the night, but my mind tells me no get up, you need to find that bill, or fold the laundry, or you forgot to prepare the diaper bag for tomorrow. Before being a stay at home mom I was great at relaxing. I used to have a long commute. The time in the safety of my car was great. I'd listen to music and just relax. It gave me, me time. By the time I got home I was completely destressed. i hope you find a solution to your problem because its really hard to be on the clock all the time. Thanks for posting and happy mylotting.
• Oxford, England
6 Oct 08
Thank you for your words. Being 'on the clock all the time' is exactly what its like - an excellent description. GTG
@zulito (174)
• Germany
5 Oct 08
sports! always works for me!
• Oxford, England
6 Oct 08
Another good idea - thank you. GTG
• Pakistan
5 Oct 08
Well here are some other things you might like to try: First: Try to train your mind to separate the two things i.e work and home. You might find it difficult at first but as time passes it will become easier. Try to think of it as two different aspects of your life. Don't talk about your work at home and vice versa. Second: Exercise. Make it a routine. Remember that healthy exercise (and not overdoing it) relaxes you instead of making you tired. Pick a time somewhere in the evening or maybe after dinner (atleast 1.5 hours after dinner). Of course what and how much would depend on your level of fitness and age and any pre-existing medical condition. Third: If you are married and have children, try to spend some time with them after work. This is also a sure-relaxer! Fourth: If, after trying everything else you are unsuccessful, and this problem is affecting your daily life, consult a Psychiatrist. He will counsel you and listen to your problem and may prescribe certain medications that will help you to relax ...hope it helps :)
• Oxford, England
6 Oct 08
People who know me would definitely agree with your 'Psychiatrist' suggestion, unfortunately not for the same reasons as you. I like your idea of exercise - swimming sounds good to me. Thank you for your comment, GTG
• United States
5 Oct 08
This happens to me all the time. I find the best thing is to get comfort food and put on some comfy clothes, and just sit. I will watch a movie, or TV, or read a book, or take a bath....sometimes all you want is to just.....be.
• Oxford, England
6 Oct 08
Yes ... you describe the state I love to be in. Trouble is, I find it hard to get there. Thanks for your comment, GTG