Say it to Their Face

Hi GT, This is definately an ethical dilemma. I believe it is usually best to confront or discuss an issue with someone we care about. I wish it were that easy. Unfortunately there are so many dimensions to peoples personalities and levels of understanding that it is not always the best to approach someone on a personal issue. For example, if I have said or done something todisturb or upset someone else, I can assure you it was done by accident. and if I'm not aware of the situation. I would want that person to come to me and present me with the issue. I can't fix something I don't know about. And I would want to fix it. If someone was offended by me because of who I am, then that is a whole other subject. Sometimes it's best to discuss an issue with a confidant that you feel secure with and get an opinion before approaching the issue with the person involved. Some people are not open to discussing issues that pertain to them. Example--My twin--Elaine does not take advice or shall we say criticism well. No matter how well put, she takes immediate offense. Once they take that stance, nothing else gets through. If someone is talking about you badly, you have the right to confront that person. And I have to say that it is not easy to do that intentionally. Do what you have to do GT and don't let them slide. leenie

I think once we grow up we should be able to talk to people about any issues we have with them. They don't have enough guts to tell you things to your face. They talk a good game though and carrying on how they are a good friend, blha, blah, blah. Actions speak louder than words. I don't lower myself to talk badly about anyone. I just keep any negative thought to myself. I walk away from people who talk badly about others because I know once my back is turned it's me they are going to be talking badly about next. The funniest thing is finding out a good friend is talking about you to their family members and they tell you. It's been quite the eye opener for me. Then they wonder why things happen and why friendships die! Karma!!!!!!

talkin behind someone's back is so juvenile...we are all grown people and grown folks shoulden't say stuff behind another grown folks back... that's just my opinion... i can honestly say i haven't did that too anyone.i'm usually straightforward with them,if i hold something in it usually bothers me till i say something...