Would you leave your spouse over money trouble?

No problem about your ranting, we all need to do it at times. I am going to use the response to this discussion as a rant I wouldn't leave my husband over money trouble, because what is the use, if I leave I still have money issues. In my case I was the main bread winner, and my husband stayed at home, doing whatever, but he never really made much money from his ventures. I go laid off from my job four months ago. He got a job as a commission only salesperson. That is almost like not working at all, because if no one buys you do not make anything. All that is happening is spending money on gas for basically a wild goose chase. that being said, money is almost non existent in my house. My husband will use his debit card to get gas, and there is no money on the card, so then we are faced with so many overlimit fee charges. I do not like him know that I am earning on Mylot, because he will then think we got money and spend more, even though these are such small earnings. When I have money, it goes towards bills and food, like your husband my husband will spend on things he really do not need. Just the other day he said, when we get twenty dollars we should take our godchildren to the movies. DUH, do they really need to go to the movie or could we possibly use twenty dollars on gas? I'm done, thanks for reading

Honestly, it sounds to me like the problem lies deeper than just spending issues. I hope you don't think I am out of line by that statement, but you sound like you have other issues between the two of you. While spending money inappropriately within the relationship is certainly an issue, if he respects you, he should also consider your feelings before going off and spending that twenty dollars at Walmart. Also, the sneering at you when you're trying to increase your earnings by writing on mylot is utterly cruel and inappropriate. Do the two of you have the ability to communicate or is he more of a loner who doesn't make the time for you? Seems to me like you need to clean house in other areas before jumping on the financal concerns you're expressing.

I would never leave my husband over money trouble. Never, ever, ever!!!! We promised to love eachother no matter what bizarre crap came our way (yes, that's precisely how I put it in our wedding vows LOL), and we are going to stick together. We don't have a lot of money, but we are getting by, and doing just fine with what we have.

Went through this earlier this year-I know how frustrating it is. My hubby's a great guy-but he can be incredibly immature at times. I feel more like a second mother to a twelve-year-old than a wife. He goes through these- "I can do what ever I want" kind of phases. During this last one- he nearly cost us our cable/internet/phone connections, which would have cost us nearly $800 to get back. Seemingly endless collection calls from his student loan agency. Disappearing Christmas money. Disappearing "pay off the accumulated Christmas bills" money. The last straws came in January and February, when I found out our savings account was gone. That money was being saved as a "baby fund" of sorts. (I don't get paid for maternity leave, so we were putting it aside in advance.) Two days after I found out about that-he revealed that he was overdrawn in his own checking account, once again...(Where the money went is another story- he basically ate and drank it at a nearby pub with a former co-worker, and not exactly a good influence.)At this point- he started handing over the cash from his paychecks to me, after getting gas and setting apart a little bit for meals for the week. I took over all the bills. Then he turned around and spent $85 on a gym membership-that we could ill afford at the time-to use the treadmill for one month-when I was struggling to pay vet bills and get the rest of his first mess cleaned up. He hid it from me and lied to me about why he was coming home late. I caught him the second day, when I found the receipt. So- we had a powwow-I didn't threaten divorce, but I told him if he wants this marriage to survive, he needs to grow up and show some real responsibility-no more lying, no more frivolous spending, no more (other bad habits), because I'm sick of being the only adult here. What he had done was inexcusable. As of now- his main paycheck is direct deposited into my account along with mine. (We kept separate checking accounts; thank goodness for that.) He keeps his second paycheck as long as he helps out with whatever we need first. His soccer referee money is his to do with as he pleases, just as my Internet earnings are mine alone. I still pay all the bills and have caught everything up. I don't know quite what to suggest for you...other than to kind of lay down the law, so to speak. I don't think my husband ever really thought about what he was doing and the fact that what he chooses to do now has consequences for me and his family, (and vice versa, of course.) That "discussion" we had in February was gut-wrenching, but I think it got thru to him and things have been going a lot better in that department. He's been trying really hard to help out and put needs before wants, and to act more like responsible spouse instead of an eternal teenager. :)

Sounds like you have 2 choices... 1. put your foot down and take over the money handling. Give him his weekly allowance for necessities and that is that or 2. deal with it Every couple fights over money... we still have our fair share. I personally am #1 above. I handle all the finances. My husband gets $10 a week for fast food on 1 day and he gets his gas money. He never needs more. I buy him anything else he needs while I do my weekly shopping. I decide what bills are being paid and whatever else we're doing. If we have spending money I tell him so and we usually do a weekly outing on Sundays. This has worked well for us for as long as we've been married. When he was handling the finances the entire paycheck would be blown and nothing would go towards bills. He will still occasionally call and ask if he can buy lunch and I'll flat out say no. If he has a problem... oh well! But that's just me... I don't mind ticking people off, lol. I realize others aren't so comfortable with confrontation and they're the ones who just deal with it. Basically he just wants to complain and not really do anything to solve the problem. A lot of people are like that. You have to train yourself to tune him out when he gets that way.

I would'nt leave my husband because of money trouble. I know sometimes life is hard but there is always a solution to it. I know that sometimes misunderstanding and argument because of money happens but i dont let it ruin the relationship. I usually avoid confrontation when it comes to money. What i usually do is stretch out the budget and not buy stuff that are not necessary. But i dont tolerate if sometimes he becomes grumpy either. If i know he is wrong i make sure i let him know that he has no right to act that way since he was the one who did not use the money wisely. We made a vow in front of God that we will be together for better or for worst. I will never leave his side at times when i know he needed me the most. I know life is tough specially when financial problems arises but i know that there is always a way out to every problem.

I just lost my job, so I can relate a little bit. Thankfully, I don't have kids. How old is your kid? Perhaps you get a job that has a daycare attached. I know there are such places.

[i]HI beauty, I will not and the best solution is to talk over the topic and have a goal and each one of us must be determined to work on our goal! Sometimes, I am doing that when I am stress but I will also realize that not fair to my husband! Anyway, do not apologize for ranting,I guess this is a perfect site to release and share our feelings! [/i]

When my husband and I were married about 5 yrs, we were dealing with money problems. Both of us were working, but it was him who was so strict on what we would spend money on. He would get mad at me if I took my son to Burger King during lunch time. I would spend money only of fries and then he played on the playground. He was always on my case, like we couldn't afford one stinkin dollar. I almost left him over this. I told him that I couldn't live the rest of my life this way.....so now, he is like your husband!! Now I do give him an allowance so he can't stop and just buy whatever he wants on the way home from work. When it gets too much, I ask him to sit down and go over the budget with me. This way he knows exactly where we stand on money and who is spending what and on what.

NO infect its time to show ur sincerity, Loyality Marriage is called Sharing all Good and bad times, If u stay in High time and feel in Low time then its better that they leave u At low times spouse need support, both moral uplifting and some what finanicial. And thats what u called Family, stay togather and support each other in every condition Take care

You dont have to be sorry for ranting we are your friends and friends listen,I really dont have any answers though to money problems I have them myself sometime and I think things are going to get alot worse,my husband use to be alot like yours until we started running out of things,like toilet paper,mouthwash,things like that,when he ask why I simply pointed out his spending habits,since then he gets what he calls a allowance and I get the rest we no longer run out of things.No I would not leave him over money troubles.You have a great night.

No worries, a lot of us are in the same position money wise. I do not have the problem that you have with your hubby, he probably gets it more off me as I worry terrible about money and lack of it and I am always bending his ear about everything! I have been in charge of the finances more or less since we first got together, I give him so much money a week for himself, and if he spends it all, tough. He has now got used to the amount he has and is in fact doing really well with it and he makes it last and he manages to stretch it further each week, but he used to spend all of it plus the overdraft too and I used to get so mad at him. My hubby is very supportive of me working online, he knows that what I earn is no fortune but he always encourages me by saying "every little helps" and that means a lot because he knows that I feel bad that I cannot work because of having the children, he does not want me to have to work.

I can imagine how you feel. Inever let my wife worry about money. I tell her teh limits and let her buy what she wants. She is neve short of anything. If she wants some thing and she tells me about it, I make sure that she gets it. She never knows how much money we have and never asks me. I do tell her where the problems areas are and she genuinely does not demand too many things. I only try to spoil her by fulfilling alher needs.

I would not leave my husband over money issues, but I would get out and work even more than I already do if I had to. I have three kids of my own, so I understand the need to have them looked after. Surely there is someone that you know that could babysit for you, even if it is only so you can work a part time job. He may be unwilling to change his habits to help the situation, but you have the ability to make a change yourself. Take a stand. If you feel that more money is needed to make ands meet, and he doesn't want to help. find a sitter for your kids, and get a job. He may not like it, but at least you will know that you are doing everything that you can to care for your kids.

I have heard it said that it is money troubles that break up most relationships. I think by the world's economy turning the way it appears to be turning, then we are probably going to see a lot more of it in the months to come. Maybe what will happen is that those in weak relationships will fall away whereas those in solid relationships like yourself will carry on. It sounds to me as though he needs to get a better job himself if he wants to carry on spending like that. Maybe the simplest solution is the one to go for, see if he will up his search for work?

ok, i know i'll get a lot of negative feedbacks on this post and will be judged.. but i did leave my husband over money trouble. before you throw rocks at me, let me tell you that i left him about 3 yrs ago with my 7yo son. i went back to my mom and she helped me move on. i realized i need to do something when one day i had nothing to feed my child, we can't pay rent and tuition, was neck deep in debts. and he told me that we should move our son to a public school. i told him, our son is in a good school and he's doing great. all we need is to find a way to earn money. i know i shouldn't blame everything on him. but i feel that he can't support/raise his family. he's picky in getting a job, he wants to have his own business but needs a huge capital, he wants to get a job abroad but he needs to study (we can't even pay our son's tuition). unless things go his way, he relies on his mom to help him out. us being together with this kind of problem isnt any good for my son, who always sees us having an argument. now, i couldn't be happier. i got good job, my son is doing great in school, i can provide for him, and i'm stress free. i do feel guilty leaving him. but i can't wait for him to come around and realize that he's got a family to feed. bills can't wait. i'd feel guiltier if i can't give my son a good future. to finish off, i only married him because i got pregnant. maybe that's why i caved in, my love for him is not that strong. maybe i'm not meant to be a wife.. only a mother. my son is my priority now.

Of course I won't leave my spouse because of money trouble. As what we have promised when we got married, we shouldn't leave each other because of the financial and healthy problems. Money is important, but it's not the most important thing for me. If I have to think out a reason to leave my husband, then it will be the betray or something like that. I love China

I would leave them peniless, and i would fake my illness first and let them work hard for everything. Seriously, hardwork gets the best of everything. I don't want my kids to have a golden spoon when they born.

Leaving your spouse during crisis is one of the cheapest thing one does in their life.Money is not the things which will be there with you all the time.. Every people face some problem in their life today or tomorrow but this doesnot mean that we keep on leaving our nearest one ... we should not panic with thw situation we should face it this is only the solution for any problem.........leaving your spouse will not make everything good in life or give money....

i will never ever leave my spouse..i always keep on my mind the wedding vow to be together IN RICHER OR IN POORER.. every problem will be solve easily if husband and wife talk sincerly and find way how to solve bout the issues in their house.