have you been so weak in your life you feel like you've got no one but yourself?

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i am a strong person. i am a strong girl. i know that. and everyone who knows me knows that. people who feel so weak talk to me, they say i just have that speech ability that gives them hope. it makes me happy being able to do so. however, there are times i myself feel weak, and no one is there for me. i have always been a strong person, and i can say that times like this even made me stronger. but somehow, i also want to know how it feels like to have someone i can run to. i lost my grandmother more than a year ago, and she has always been the one to make me feel better. now that she's gone, i feel so much weaker. i feel like i lost the person i draw my strength from. the feeling drains my life away from me. it hurts me knowing that she might be hurting because im still crying for losing her. i should be happy because up there in heaven she's all better. i know i should be happy for her, but i just cant stop these tears. now that she's gone, i feel like i only have myself. problems are flooding me, and even though i know i'll be fine, i would want to have someone who can lend me a shoulder when i need one. despite the fact that i have a lot of friends, and i belong to a close knit family, they see me as strong person, so strong that i can go through anything. have you ever felt this way? if so, what can i do to help myself?