How do I break it to my ex... that we broke up 5 months ago?
By Simoneetah
@Simoneetah (420)
Canada
October 28, 2008 11:28am CST
First of all I'd like to thank those who helped me through my break up with my ex. There were some key people who posted comments just when I needed it. Especially my dream analysis. My friend you have no idea how blown away I was that you were able to tell me exactly what was going on in my life. It was a hard decision that needed to be made and I did it.
NOW... It has been a stress free (kinda) 5 months except for this. I've gone out, slept, ate, and took the time to do me. Not to mention everyone took a big sigh of relief when I broke the news to them that I broke it off. BUT THE EX still try's to win me back. Worm his way in. He is deaf, stubborn and persistent to the point of creepiness. He argues with me like we're still together. It's gotten to the point where he is calling my friends and siblings and talks about proposing to me. TOO WHO?!?! I'm tired of hanging up on him. Tired of receiving text msgs. Mind you I got 10 in 2 min yesterday. Tired of him leaving v-mails and e-mails. I want to shake him and tell him to leave me alone. I've explained my decision to him till I was blue in the face! He still asks me out. Gives me a speeches. The works! It's not flattering and is pathetic, desperate and neeeedy. It is to the point now that I've been cautioned not to be alone with this person and to cut him off completely. However I can only do that in February 2009. Such a long way away. (I will not explain why but trust me if I could break that umbilical cord I would in a heart beat)
I try not to be outright rude with him because he seems to be in a not so good place and I don't want him to become violent. I'm not saying he would do something like that but you never know. He's very fragile right now. BUT I WANT TO SOOOOOOO BADDDDD!! I don't know any other way to tell him that I've moved on and he should too. I find some of what he says SO FUNNY! Of course I don't tell him that. (as we speak he is calling my cell right now!)
My friend gave me this analogy. It's like he got fired and doesn't want to believe it so he shows up to work...everyday....for 5 months.
How can I stay sane!!!! When will this end!!!
3 responses
@jesssp (2712)
• Canada
28 Oct 08
Hi there, I don't know your back story but I'll try and give a little advice anyway.
If you can't cut ties until February for whatever reason then you seem to have limited options. Whatever the reason for waiting I would strongly suggest taking some steps now because it sounds like things could get really scary. I would recommend blocking his number from your phones and block his email. Changing numbers and emails would be even better. You could always get a big guy to have a little chat with him, not beat him up or anything but intimidate him a little. And if you had a good relationship with his parents or other family you may want to go to them and explain what's happening. Sometimes if a family member is made aware of what's going on and they talk to the ex it can be more effective.
Most importantly you have to make sure that you aren't giving him any hope whatsoever. It certainly doesn't sound like you are but unfortunately sometimes the only way to do that is to absolutely cut all ties. And since you can't do that it makes everything more complicated.
And my last little bit of advice is if you start to get really scared and are actually worried that he is going to harm you then call the police! Whatever the reason you need to wait until February, if things start to get dangerous then you need to take action! Hope I helped at least a little.
2 people like this
@Simoneetah (420)
• Canada
29 Oct 08
Hi Jesssp,
Thanks for your advice. I hope I don't have to go to the police. I was thinking maybe going to one of his friends house and asking them to talk some sence into him. They are a well rounded couple and were great friends to us. Especially him.
Blocking his number from my cell is something a friend and I discussed. She brought up the idea that he should only call the house. Once my house knows what is going on he can't call me and act a fool. Whatever business he and I have until February will be structured and filtered through my parents. He wouldn't want to get on my fathers bad side.
@Simoneetah (420)
• Canada
29 Oct 08
Hi Subha,
I sure hope he does. It is very irritating. I hope it's sooner rather than later.
@ronaldinu (12422)
• Malta
8 Nov 08
It seems that you have not explained why you cannot make a clean cut with your ex? Maybe you prefer to keep it a secret. But that;s what you need to do. Make a fresh start in your life. If he persists, change your mobile phone number. Soon he will grow out of it. If not seek professional help and the police for pestering you.
© ronaldinu 2008
