please explain the "female friend" situation? i don't get it!

can I just say something here? coming from the other angle. I am a woman and only seem to attract male friends and I believe that is only because they want to get in my pants. I continue to just play it off as friends but I know different and so do the guys. my husband is very trusting and never says anything about who I can be friends with altho he isn't stupid. I am home alone alot while he works and I look after kids that are almost grown and not around much. Friends are the only contact I have outside of the confining walls of my home. but male-female friends is probably not a good idea. It just puts alot of pressure on a relationship, even if nobody is saying anything about it. the pressure is still underlying and the ideas are still in people's heads. People are human, they think stuff. If you had a fight and he left the house where do you think the first place he would go for comforting?......to a friend who just happens to be another woman. Those women friends probably have him on a mental waiting list and he probably has them on a backup list. Im telling you as a woman with male friends, that I am feeling that it is unfair and disrespectful and I should not continue to have male friends. It would be great for your husband to come to that conclusion on his own also because pressure from you might not work. I hope that he does or that you could approach the topic gingerly and make him realize how uncomfortable it makes you feel. Like as if, you are not enough for him. it's just allowing temptation to permenantly park at your front door. everybody is tempted, no matter how much they love their spouse. Anybody who says otherwise is a liar. You just have to avoid the temptation by focusing on the family you have chosen to love for the rest of your life and build your life in them. It's not always easy, it's not always exciting, but it is honorable and rewarding. I guess people just have to decide for themselves what kind of person they want to be and then act accordingly. A virtuous man would not have female friends that he see's regularly, especially single ones. that is all there is to it, plain and simple. How do I know this? because the male friends I have are married and I know the things they tell me....not virtuous. good luck, I hope he comes around and fulfills your every dream.

I'm not married yet, but I have lots male and female friends; I bi. If my partner said I couldn't be friends with a person of whatever gender they were I probably wouldn't bother liking them anymore, unless they were committed to working on the issue. I've had friends of both genders my whole life and I don't plan to stop that when I get married.

hi kyeedah1 I never did deal with it, as it just to easy to go from friend to friend with benefits, better he has male friends instead. I nipped his budding friendship with this woman who was looking for a lover in the bud, namely its her or me, as I would leave him with our two kids if he thought thatlittle of me, and he quickly dropped the friendship as he told me he loved me and respected me. we had married friends but no single women friends for my husband.It wasnt so much that I did not trust him, but I knew I should not trust her at all.

A husband having female friends and that two single girls may not go well with you i am sure, and no wife would be able to accept it with ease. But I feel that if you make an issue of it, he will not tell you about it and still continue the freindship silently. That could be worse. This way at least he will be open about it and will meet them in your presence. You have to have faith in yor own capabilities and your own charm to attract yor husband. Give him so much love that he does not need it from anyone else. Satisfy him psychologically and physically. When he is happy with you, he will slowly forget his other female friends. If you nag him, you willdrive him right into the arms of his other female friends. The situation could get worse.

I know you do feel a bit uncomfortable in such a case, but you have to trust your husband or otherwise your relationship will in effect be affected. Anyway, he has the right to talk to and be friends with other males and females just as you have the right to be friends with males and other females. It does not mean that he is having an affair with that person.