Do you believe that romance novels influence women's behaviour
By ronnyb
@ronnyb (6113)
Jamaica
November 8, 2008 3:23pm CST
Do you believe that romance novels have an impact on women's concept of love .Do you believe that many women expect that their knight in shining armour will ride in on a white stallion to save them (in a manner of speaking) and everything will be happily ever after .Do you think many women are able to recognise that this is fantasy and rarely happens like that.And dont forget the basic cliche of all these books 'tall dark and handsome"
Do you believe for instance that when Joey rides in on his battered chevy truck nce that he is fighting the battle of his life against gloriuos white stallion (extrapolated for todays time - a porsche or BMW).Does Joey for instance know that his not too straight teeth and wide mouth are in stark contrast to her hero who is tall dark and handsome and will sweep her off her feet.Does he know that the fact that he works nine to five and often come home dirty and smelly is definitely not what her hero does- heck he is born into money .Does he realise that he will have to try twice as much to accomplish only a half of what her mythical prince can do with just a wave of his hand.
Could this be the reason why so many marriages fail? ,failure to recognise the difference between fantasy and reality.Do women feel that everything should come pre -arranged and they should just come in and be princesses and look pretty.What's up with the doing laundry ,household chores and struggling to pay bills .None of her romance books ever speak of ghetto princesses who have to sacrifice to make ends meet ?.None of these book ever mention the hard work that goes in to a marriage and that ,happily ever after is few and far between
This fight betwwen fantasy and reality make the life of a REAL man so much harder.Does it make you wonder how many good realtionships have been forfeited because it didnt fit the profile given in romance novels.
6 responses
@calicot (256)
• Philippines
9 Nov 08
It's probable to be. I myself would tend to be a hopeless romantic after watching a romantic movie. Maybe it's because there are many people that have some longing for something and somehow relate to those situationes described in a story read or have seen in a movie. That doesn't make us an incomplete, naive, dumb person. On the contrary, people who are expressive themselves are far more better to be with.
concerning your topic, the problem would then arise when a person having read or watched too much romantic stories behave in such that their standards are exactly as those. Who doesn't want a knight in shining armor, to be one or help a damsel in distress? I wouldn't. But if that becomes the ultimate goal to have, "being rescued by a knight, a prince and live happily ever after" then sorry to say that that person will be in one big disappointing relationship one after another. reality bites and for a fantasy, romatic person it will bite very painfully. But fairytales sometimes do come true, but only for a very minute and lucky few. Maybe 1 : 1 million or so lol.
@anandkumar35 (33)
•
9 Nov 08
ya most of the time it does and people start copparing themselves with that novel or will be trying to do the same thing as there in that novel to get that kind of life.
so i believe that most of the time it does.............
@migenKC (792)
• Philippines
9 Nov 08
books and novels are very influential to me especially those that the girl narrates the story and she describes the man she had been dying to love. it might be one of the factors why relationships or marriages fail because the girl's expectation of her partner has not been reached to her satisfaction. most probably, the same as to men (it might not be from novels) but should be from someone or somwhere. on this case, people in many situation put a level of standard of what they should achieve on a certain time (achievement in the figure of the partner from choosing who has to be). it is normal that fantasy takes place to people's minds and try to put it on reality. well, thats how all the technology started anyway. but when it comes to "changing a man's ability to make a relationship on success" fantasy such as those on fairy tales does not apply onto it. BUT it is always normal to talk about whatever the girl or either of them expects to one and the other and the both of them has to have an open mind to compromise. understanding is the key.
as for me, i believe i have the man i always wanted to have (the man i dream), there might be flaws but overall he's the only one i could say can make me happy. well, on my standards it is actually based on to other people's relationship and novels i read where a man saves the woman everytime, understands and enjoys the company. my man has everything i dream about (and i think he feels the same for me). we're two different people but we open our different worlds (either fantasy or reality) to be able to understand each other's mind, vision, expectations, and feelings.
i enjoyed responding to your post. thank you...
@Amberina (1541)
• United States
9 Nov 08
I grew up reading those romance novels and they gave me the wrong perspective of what a man should be. Needless to say I never found my fantasy man so I had to let that thought go lol. I did read a book that empowered this woman and the woman was actually the hero, after reading that book I began to think that I have the power to make myself happy no one else is going to do it for me. Life got easier after I realized that lol.
@hildas (3031)
•
8 Nov 08
No. I read romance novels and it does not make women (well not me anyway) want to live up to them. It does make you feel romantic after reading them, but this is a good thing. No, women to not want make believe, they want real stuff. They want their partners to show they care and make them feel special and loved.
I do a lot of laundry, look after four daughters and it is hard work. As long as I feel appreciated and loved, thats all that matters to me. I do feel better about myself when I look nice.
I know what you are saying though. I do think some people live a dream. One that will never happen. They might search forever for the perfect person to come along, but in reality it will never happen. These people will wait around for ever.
These books do not mention real life 'no'. They are fiction books of fantasy living.
@iamfine (740)
• China
9 Nov 08
I do I believe, and watching romatic movie or TV can exert the same influence on women too.
When I was a child, reading romance novels are forbidden in our family and our school, so I have no the chance to read them. When I am in the college, one of my teachers told me that reading romance novels would make you become stupid. I read one or two romance novels, and I find that's really stupid(or maybe I didn't choose the right book). Because such things is obviously not gonna happen in reality. The writer exaggerate everything.
I have ever saw some of my classmates crying in front of computer when they were watch romance movies or TV, and would laugh at them, how stupid, they fake the stories. But sometimes I do the same thing to them...and I will feel that I was so stupid.
