I want to hold on but my past mistakes and current fights make matters worse!
By joniii247
@joniii247 (8)
November 9, 2008 9:43am CST
I really love her so much. We started out as friends, then we got really close to each other and I really fell for not because she is beautiful but because of who she is, and how she made a change in me. All of our friends really vote for our relationship and they really see us really sweet. She is a very sweet, down to earth and the only one of her kind on earth (its true, she's the most honest person I have ever met, she's never a poser on the things she love and do, in short, she's the truest person I have ever met!) On the otherside, I am her total opposite, i tend to forget things (not just things but IMPORTANT things that really matters) clumsy, weak, and I somehow hesitate on my actions and sometimes when I try hard to open myself to her, I end up being the "not-so-open" guy because for her, I tend to be hiding something from her. We underwent many fights already and I had opened my deepest and darkest kept secret that only her knows about me. Yet she has accepted me for who I am. However, whenever I commit the same mistake, it results in a big fight. it was always like that until she thought o me as being very inconsistent. I admit I am inconcsistent, But I LEARN from these mistakes. I just don't know why she can't see that I am trying my hardest not to make those same mistakes again? I know it takes a while before I learn and that means doing the same thing again, but her temper is really getting out of hand. One small mistake, and BOOM! the day is full of fights, cold war and all. I thought everything will be okay by being open, but it seems we're getting even more fights now? I am having a hard time specially of her mood swings... I am just a student in college and but I would spend so much time for her, so many money for her just for us to be together, have a quality time together, talking things out, making every minute memorable (she takes a lot of pictures!!!) but one small mistake, and every effort I gave comes crumbling down.. Boom! Back to ZERO boy! dammit I really hate myself when that happens... because of that, I really have so low self-esteem. every week won't pass by without an argument or fight. Guys I need serious advise as to how to save this relationship...
Right now I want to tell her how I feel when she's being so bossy, but I am having a hard time trying to tell that to her without offending her and might blow things up... Should I hold on to her? I want to but it's so hard to with the way I am... Help
2 responses
@eshaan (6188)
• India
9 Nov 08
Try to be cool, calm, try to avoid meetings and talking for few days, i have experienced that it takes sometime to forget what happened in the past, soon both u and she (if u really love each other) will relise that how important u both are for each other. And both will try tp forget each others fault, and then meet again with all that sweetness..
@joniii247 (8)
•
9 Nov 08
I already did that to her... She's not that type of girl. I really have to be with her and talk things out and not let it pass by. she gets more mad and she even out a "you're losing me" note on our locker coz I was hoping everything would be fine if I don't see her for some time...
@cathya (704)
• Philippines
10 Nov 08
hi,
while reading your discussion i thought of my boyfriend, he's like you..lol
and to tell you honestly, we're in same situation, and as i've said my BF is like you, when we had little arguments (mostly because of him) or fights, after we settle the issue we keep on telling each other "lets forget about it as if it didn't happen" i know by heart that i really forget the issue and don't go back to that issue no matter what happened and i know he's also doing the same. and one thing i love with him is that he initiates that we should not let a day pass without settling our arguments meaning we really don't sleep unless we end up exchanging i love yous.
sometimes i also feel that i dominate the relationship but am always reminding myself not to be like that.
now with your situation , i'd like to suggest that you try to talk as if its your first date, i mean try to go somewhere else where you can talk out your hearts , treat each other as if you are just best friends(it suppose to be like that , right?) trying to help each other, trying to protect each other...and tell her that ones you settle things , forget about it as if it didn't happen for the two of you to move on...reminisce you happy moments and erase the bad ones
lastly, don't just tell her that you changed, show it to her...most of us girls are like that we are not satisfied with just hearing words, we want to feel it, we want to see it...show to her that you learned from your mistakes and trying not to do it again
gud luck!
@joniii247 (8)
•
10 Nov 08
Thanks
well, we had just talked about our situation. It was fruitful and open indeed, its just that we're both facing a really tough situation. Just like you, we don't want to end the day without saying I love you's, even if im the only who would end up saying it. I just hope nothing comes up after this. its really affecting our studies...
Thanks again
