I want your opinions on this.
@cathyisgodschild (94)
United States
November 12, 2008 10:29am CST
I worked in a small town for a drug and alcohol rehab facility. They have a rule that there is to be no personal contact with ex-clients for 5 years after they leave treatment. I have no problem with the rule. I totally agree that it would not be a good idea to establish a relationship with someone who is just getting over addictions because they have enough to worry about. as I said this is a small town and I grew up here so I know most everyone. I am also a Christian and I believe that doing kindness is a necessity if I profess Jesus as my Lord. That is where the problem arises. You see an ex-client whom I had also known for a while needed a ride to church and I gave it to him. Automatically it was blown out of proportion and assumed that we were dating. We were NOT. That is the reason they gave for firing me and they did not do any checking with me or him. If they had they would have found that he has a girlfriend who is also someone I know. They are trying to deny me unemployment saying that I had a relationship with this guy. My question to you is do I fight it or give up? I want to fight for my rights but would love your input please. So fight or give? Does this policy even make sense to you?
4 responses
@YoungInLove (1254)
• Canada
13 Nov 08
I think you have any rason to be upset. Now I dont quite follow if your not allowed to have any contact as in talking, or relatinship, but either way I dont understand. 5 years is kinda harsh. If you've known the person and have been a help or was there for them all along (assuming you were there during the whole process) isnt it kind of unfair to forbid contact for 5 years? I would be pretty upset if I was going through a tough time and met someone who got me through the days only to find out when I was out I wasnt allowed to talk to them for 5 years, rediculous. Isnt there anythng you can do about it? Go to the board of labour or anyhting? Cause by the looks of it its a really weak excuse to fire you, they didnt look into the situation at all, they just assumed and took action. I think thats wrong.
1 person likes this
@YoungInLove (1254)
• Canada
13 Nov 08
That is just completely unreal!! Driviin someone as a favour and all of a sudden you are fired from your job for having a relatinship. Ugh.. Im not sure what you can really do anymore, seems liek all power is against you. That is pretty corrupt though, Im frustrated for you:(
1 person likes this
@cathyisgodschild (94)
• United States
13 Nov 08
See, that is the problem right now. My unemployment from this job was denied by the state. The company said that I was "dating" the guy. The state unemployment office said I was let go due to a "failure to follow company policy by having a relationship with an ex-client"
I was not doing either. Do you think that maybe the term relationship is a relative term in that it might mean different things to different people. Personally I think most people agree on what a relationship is. These people are supposed to be "the healthy" ones. Opal, I know you will laugh at that one.
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
13 Nov 08
Hi cathy! Welcome to mylot! I am very familiar with those
rules as you know! I spent 15 months in a rehab facility as
a client. I wanted to keep in touch with my counselor. She
was having some very serious health issues and was having a
kidney transplant. And even though I was no longer in the
facility any longer she said I couldn't keep in touch with
her. I felt really badly about this, but she said that it
was the rules. I think that you should absolutely fight this
since you know and this person know that it was nothing more
than what you say it was! If this person is willing to stand
up and make a statement on you behalf the I would definitely
fight. I had to fight for my unemployment once and it was
against a law firm that fired me. They lied about the real
circumstances. I had to come face to face with the managing
partner in from of the Judge. I won the case! In fact the
Judge was yelling at my ex-boss! It felt so great to win over
an attorney who was lying! So you can win this too! I will
discuss this and give you all the help that I can and all the
tips that I can to help you! Just pm me and let me know me
what you want to do!
1 person likes this
@cathyisgodschild (94)
• United States
13 Nov 08
Like I said I sent a letter of appeal. I'm not sure what I am supposed to do from here other then wait. As you know very well, the old me would have been throwing a fir when they fired me. surprisingly enough I took it real well. I'm just being honest here in that it does anger me that they did not even investigate but just took someones word for it. If you have more information on what to do next please tell me. thank you for such a wonderful answer to my first discussion.
@sudalunts (5523)
• United States
12 Nov 08
You are in an unfair and unfortunate situation. If I were you, I would fight it. I would not give in and make themd think that they were right without evein giving you an opportunity to tell what really happened. I would imagine that it was church members who starting talking. I can not understand that, but I guess I need to live in a small town to understand how people talk.
Maybe there is someone in your church who can be a witness for you that you were only giving this person a ride.
I wish you luck, and do not give in.
1 person likes this
@cathyisgodschild (94)
• United States
12 Nov 08
I did send an appeal letter to unemployment but I do not know how that will go as I have never done anything like this before. I have been looking for work but as I said it is a small town and we are suffering like everyone else. I have been trying to make some money on the computer but it is slow and a few cents here and there is not easing the burden much. It took them 8 weeks to tell me I was denied. I wonder how much longer I can hold out. I try to keep positive by remembering that I have placed this in God's hands and that He will work it out for my good. I still need some work in the patience department I guess. LOL I imagine that you are probably right about it being a church member. it is hard to believe that so many who say they are Christian just do not act like it. Even now I find myself not being very Christ like in that I am worrying. Thanks for commenting and please keep it up.
@mdesigning (345)
• Netherlands
12 Nov 08
Sorry if my answer is not what you'd like to hear, it's just difficult for me but I will try. I think you did broke a rule because the rule was to not have any contact. But to be honest, you didn't do anything wrong. What's bad about giving someone a ride? Nothing is. Doesn't it make you upset? I would fight for it but I'm sure a lot of people would just let it go to save their energy. And no, that policy doesn't really make sence to me. I mean, I understand and respect the rule. But I think just helping someone out is nothing bad at all. Good luck and best wishes!
1 person likes this
@cathyisgodschild (94)
• United States
12 Nov 08
It does indeed upset me and I feel they are being narrow minded. As I said it is a small town and I do know most everyone but oh, how they talk. Maybe that is why god told us not to be gossipers. The rule is personal contact and I do not believe that a ride to church is all that personal. Thanks for commenting and I would love to hear more from you.
1 person likes this
