My friend got beaten by her bf...and now she got pregnant!!!

Some women just never learn and just keep coming back for more. I dont understand this. I have heard so many excuses why they stay but none is what I find acceptable. One hit and Im gone. You do not hit eachother...simple as that. I dont even tolarate being yelled at or if someone uses abusive language with me. NO! I want my partner to respect me as I respect him and act accordingly to that. And that also mean we talk and not insult. You can not hurt emotionally or phisicly someone you love and respect. It is normal everyone gets mad or angry but you should always stay in control and stop at some level. There is a level for everyone even those who hits, if there wasnt any control then they would kill a person they are mad at, so the excuse such as 'i cant control' my self is bull. Everything is just a matter of choice and respect. If you see a partner as not equal as a possession then you can not set the level but if you see her/him as equal then it it easy as you feel you have no right to do some things.

There's an abusive relationship for you. This type of thing happens everywhere. It's sad, but it happens. Women, like your friend, who are in an abusive relationship, don't always realize that they are being abused and that it's not right.

I think from the moment a relationship gets violent the couple should split up. I wouldn't stay with a man that hit me. I couldn't be around a man that I was frightened of. I think in some cases an anger management class might help such a nasty man. Hitting a lady during pregnancy is dangerous for the lady and her baby. By now your poor friend must have had her baby. I hope that she and her baby are safe.

Hello daryljane, I found it hard to believe that your friend still went back to her boyfriend. You're right, they are yet to get married and he could hit her whenever he is pleased to do so. I just don't know what will happen if she becomes his wife later. So, are they still together or they already broken up? What will happen to the child then? I don't think this is a good example.

I feel sorry for her but she could go on with life without her boyfriend. I just hope you can advise her not to see him forever. If this happens to me, I will not allow anyone to beat me whether my bf or anybody else. I hope your friend knows anything about girl power.... Have a great day!!!!!!!!

hmmmm... idk what i would do in the situation. I would try to be there for her and try my best to talk her out of going back to him and to make sure the baby alright.

It doesn't matter if they are married of not. That guy should not beat her when she didn't do anything wrong. And for you, you can't do anything because their relation is different. No matter how hard they fight, they will still be back together if they really love each other. So there is nothing you can do about their fights.

its true you helped what you can. but still it should be better. now it is clear the boy is just taking advantage. when the girl is pregnant he has left. I know you can't do all in friend's life, but can say her the ways,

Well i guess you just remain to a be a good friend to her and hopefully she would decide what is best for her. I guess as a friend we could only intervene so much for their welfare but there are limitations to that too. We just have to respect that and when they fall we must accept them back in our loving arms to give strength to them again. So for now what you can do is try to tell her that you care and hopefully she would realize your point in time.

This is where the thing called "Love is Blind" comes. I feel sorry for your friend She doesnt want help all she wants is her boyfriend. Time will come she will snap out of it or probably snap her head due to her boyfriends abbusive behavior. Just dont leave her side you are a good friend someday she will realize his wrong doings and you better be there to catch her from falling. It will take time and a lot of lesson but be patient she will come to her senses. God bless you both!!!

if i were in her shoes, i would leave my abusive partner immediately.. if he did it to her the first time then i am sure there would be next.. cruel people tend to do silly things over and over again.. they will say sorry for hitting you or what but then they will do the same violent thing again when they feel upset or angry.. just be there to support her most especially now that she's pregnant.. goodluck to your friend..

That's so bad.I hope your friend wont end up being with that guy again.women do not deserve to be treated like that.If i was in her situation,i could have him reported and arrested by the police.He doesn't deserve to be a father also.Imagined if you were not there during the time your friend was being hurt.He moght have lost the baby.I hope your friend will get back on her feet again soon.

I think your friend should break up with her bf,because there will be the same situation for the second time. her bf is a violent man and he is not worthy of love.

If I were in the shoes of your friend I'll definitely leave that irresponsible boyfriend. Its ok to have misunderstanding but beating a girlfriend is a different subject. I think its an act of cowardness. Even without the support of the boyfriend I think your friend will definitely survive her pregnancy with your help. Your friend is very lucky to have a supportive friend like you. Hope you're friend will think twice if ever she'll accept the man again because others say that if the man already beaten her once he'll probably do it again anytime when they're together. God bless!

She should stay as far away from him as she can. But you are correct, you cannot make her decisions. Some people learn from one experience like this, and others do not learn until it happens over and over again. I hope she learns fast.

all you can do is to be there for your friend and hope that she will figure out what's right for her and her child. Sad that a child has to be in the middle of this situation but maybe for the sake of the child she'll realize that getting away from an abusive relationship is the best choice.

Well its really very hard by now because it seems things are getting worse w/ the coming of the baby. She don't seem to have any sense of security by him. He displays a negative attitude. If I am in her situation I'd rather live alone w/ my child than marrying or living w/ somebody who hursts me. But she can demand for child support....but if he refuses to give some, then she would just have to stand up for herself.......she is matured enough and all the things happened to her was her responsibility. I assume she's no longer a teen ager. She must have to stand up and pick up the peices of her life and live a new life hopefully learning the lessons she had.

hi daryl, woman everywhere are the same ... we claim love for all this suffering ... if the guy beat her once, he will beat her anytime event when she is pregnant ... This type of girl normally have very low self esteem, she must think that she got the beating because she deserved it, or she is not able to have a good life without him .. may god bless her and her child cheers

I have this classmate in college whose bf constantly beats her up, but hits her in places where it can be disguised by our uniform. Yes, we still had uniforms during college and we all hated it!lol Anyway, she always comes to class with swollen eyes and when we ask her about it she just flippantly says "oh, ----- and I had a fight last night." What she wasn't telling us though is the guy has been hitting her since they got together and for reasons that were superficial! We knew about it because one friend of hers told us. The friend couldn't take it anymore and was already asking for help. Everyone was really worried about her and told her to break up with him. That was when she opened up to us that she had already done it millions of times but then he says sorry and promises not to do it again. Weeks after that he would pick a fight and hit her again. There was even one time when I actually saw half of her upper arm turn bluish black! It was really scary. And one male classmate of ours nearly got run over by her bf's car, and later she said the bf got jealous of our classmate. It's been a long time since I last heard from her, and she seems to have finally broken free from him. AS to how she did or what happened between them I do not know.

I will leave him, and will never come back to him. I think it will be better for me to live alone with my baby, and i know my family will be always there for me. They support me all the time, they will feel sad if i have such a bf or husband. From my perspective, a man who beats his gf or wife is not responsible person, and somemore she is pregnant! This is unacceptable for me. I know it might be a big hit for me if i leave him, but how long will this sadness last? Finally it will be replaced by the happiness of having a healthy baby! Love sometimes blind us to make foolish things in our life! I bless your girlfriend, hope she is fine now and be happy.