Why are the elderly always left alone?

Oh this is becoming ever so common these days, people just seem to want to get on with their own lives and forget about the older members, I volunteered for 6 years in a nursing home and I saw it all the time, kids not ever visiting their parents but they always had time at the end to collect the inheritance, I actually saw two sons who never visited their mother actually fighting over the money minutes after she passed away...it is very sad...

Honestly I have seen this as well. I worked in a nursing home for several years before I started working in the mental health field. For some of the residents at the nursing home no one ever showed up to see them or to brighten their day. I was always saddened by that. I always tried to be as friendly as I could to them. It is true some elderly people are starved for attention. It is that way with mentally handicapped people as well. Some family members seem to think that out of site is out of mind, someone else is taking care of them. I hate the thought of it myself.

I don’t know someone who’s left alone but I dread the day when I’ll face the music myself. I may as yet thank the culture I’m born into or the non-existence of geriatric social security in my country India in the sense that these may force me to spend my last years with my only son, but I still don’t know to be sure. For one, I would not like to be a burden on him in any way yet that spectre of loneliness looms in the background if (heaven forbid) my hubby goes first. However, as human civilization progresses to the ultimate mechanized age and we have more ‘free’ time to run after our individual pursuits, people wont really have time for each other in any relation – not only parent and children. The best we can do as practical human beings is to keep some money for ourselves in old age and as children, to ensure that our parents are never in want of anything and if possible, to visit them on and off.

I am my fathers caregiver and have been doing it for the past 5 years nearly. He has heart problems and a few other health issues. He does not get around really well and can't cook etc for himself. I feel it is my responsiobilioty to tend to him now instead of placing him in a home. I can't do it all though so we also have a health care aide come in once a week. They bathe him, trim his nails, cut his hair, shave him, and anything else he requests within standards. He pays for this out of his own pocket as medicaid won't due to it is not mandatory to keeping him healthy. I enjoy being my fathers caregiver. I feel all children should take care of their elderly, ailing parents. But finances cause some to not be able to. HAPPY POSTINGS FROM GRANDPA BOB !!~

hm..pity them...i hope that i'll not let my parent be like them..if none of my siblings wanted to live with them, i'll definitely ask them to live with me...i'll spent my free times talking and enjoying times together...i hope so..people can changing in any seconds...just pray that i wil not be in a group of people that left their parents live lonely...

Hi, My dad is still living, and I have determined that if at all possible, I will not place him in a home. It is not right to leave your parents alone. That is sad that many do not care for their aprents when for so long they cared for them as kids. I will do all I can to help family, and perhaps the elderly. It is sad to watch the kids fight over inheritance, capitalism at its finest!

it is everywhere. I think parents are left by children as the children start thinking that parents are just extra load. they do not think that what parents have doen for them. they are so selfish to think their own happiness. they do not want to take responsibility

Yes both my parents are still alive, for me thou my parents are my mom and actually step dad. Thou to me he is my dad. I have nothing to do with my real biological father. I talk to my mom and dad at least once a day if not more. WE get their wood for them and help them stack it and everything. If something happens they call us and we tell them we will be there at a certain time depending on what has happened. I buy them extra foods that I know that they like and dont normally buy themselves. They are my parents, I love them and if they need anything and I can do it or help I am there along with my husband and kids. I not only think it is sad but sick that some dont seem to think that their parents deserve anything. I could never turn my back on my mom or dad and not help them when it is needed. Or even to talk to them everyday.

hello medney1988, That's one of my frustrations in life, not able to take care of my parents when they're still alive. When I have my job already and have my family of my own I stay away from my parents already. My cousin and his family were their companion at my parent's house. They were the one who took care of them for they don't like to stay here with us for our weather here is cold. Can't stay there to take care of them for we have three children and have no housekeeper. Much of my desire to be with them was really hard for me to do since I have my family that needs me too. So, I just visit them twice a month, gave them money and groceries. I know, what they need is my time but I'm always calling them up everyday, lond distance. Till such time that they were both gone. How I wish they stayed with us when they're still alive to spent more time with them.

I don't know why they don't pay attention to their parents. I pretty much put my life on hold to care for my mom in her last days. It was not easy at all and there is a price to pay...I had my own daughter to care for and a full time job as well so for nearly a year, I had no time for a social life or friends. I had little time for my own daughter and keeping up with running the home. I know that some just don't care but I don't try to 2nd guess them. Others maybe just don't have time to be there all the time. Old people are very very needy. My mom would act as if I were neglecting her if I were 5 mins. late in getting there to do my shift. Are you sure that all these people have no family that ever visits them? If they don't and they are able to then that is pretty sad.

I see it a lot too. I work in a nursing home with people who have dementia...and this happens a lot. And the ones who do come to see their parents, and I mean on a regular basis like daily, they remind you that not everyone is dropped off or forgotten. My own parents are heading into theie elderly years. I am the youngest of their children and after college moved back home to be close with them...I've always been close with them. So we decided to buy some property together with the intention of my building a place of my own eventually...hopefully soon :0) so i can still be able to watch out for them. See up North where my family is from it is pretty normal to have a nuclear family...where the grandparents live in the same household...and it can only work if one you can try to relate in order to get along and two understand respect as both the parent and child get older...But this is something that has always been in our family. And thank you for pointing out how these elderly people, who people simply look at as old people, are the ones who raised us, and gave us the chance to live our lives. I can say I honestly enjoy helping one of my patients smile when it is a sad day for them....as well as I love to hear their stories. Many people do not understand these old folks have seen and done it all...some are more interesting than we are. LOL

Many people in our country leave their parents on the roads..and they dont even offer food or clothing,its really very sad..and some people they will keep them in old age homes they dont even care abt there parents..but parents want to spend there time with chidren..but no chance poor parents..i love my parents..i stay with them..there are protecting there own...but we take care of them...they gave us the life..we have to take care of them...its real truth.i hate people who dont care there parents...i want to kill them

I'm only 15, so yep, my parents are still alive. It's horrible what you said about your elderly patients, I will definitely not treat my parents this way. I care about them and I want only the best for them - I would gladly sacrifice what I have for their happiness when they get old because I know that they have done this for me at more than one point in my life. How devestating it is to hear about these people that are just being dropped of at elderly homes by their children, when they need their help more than ever! Young people today are so ungrateful, it's unbelievable. They should appreciate all that their parents have done for them - and there are very few excuses I can think of not to show some care and respect for them, that's the least they could do. It's good that someone finally sees the problem that only seems to be increasing as people stop caring for their parents. Really encouraging to know that there are other people out there that still care. ^_^

its depends on their children.

Hi, This is so true. I've heard too many horror stories about nursing homes. YOu never know, so why take the chance if you don't have to?